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A little humor...

Discussion in 'Off-topic Zone' started by trickblue, Mar 1, 2011.

  1. trickblue

    trickblue Old Testament...

    29,493 Messages
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    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

    Bud looks at the man, a yuppie type - then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his iPhone that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with an email on his iPhone and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young struggles to stuff it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give back that calf?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

    "You're a congressman." says Bud.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you wanted to get something for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are - and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter: This is a herd of sheep... Now give me back my dog."
  2. Yeagermeister

    Yeagermeister Active Member

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    :lmao:
  3. BrAinPaiNt

    BrAinPaiNt Backwoods Sexy Staff Member

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    :laugh2: @ it being a dog.
  4. MonsterD

    MonsterD Quota outta absentia

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    That was pretty funny. :)
  5. big dog cowboy

    big dog cowboy THE BIG DOG Staff Member

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  6. Phoenix

    Phoenix Well-Known Member

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    Nice :laugh2:

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