Mens, womans, TheraFlu takers, misfits, cubicle dwellers and visionaries: I was seated on my favorite lawn chair, watching the workmens finish building a culvert near my house when it occurred to me: Jerra half always wanted to be the ultimate "football guy." And he is not getting any younger. And then this ugly thought occurred to me. Ugly, ah tell you. Uglier than a double date with Mayra Angelou and Golda Mier at a Pistol Pete's restaurant. Uglier than Richard Sherman's usage of the englitch language. Uglier than a next year's Pro Bowl (Goodell's idea might be to suit up all owners and GMs for a flag foosball game to hike the TV ratings.) It can happen: Jerra as head coach of the Cowboys. That is what he half alwlays wanted. What would satisfy him, professionally. Bare with me. Because it (echo chamber) can happen. Imagine. Jerra would be able to make up his own plays: QB Statue of Liberty with a handoff to a fullback blocked by a wide receiver who laterals to the RB who tosses it to the QB in the end zone. Or, the center snaps the ball to the RB who in turn keeps it on an option play to a tight end. Or his favorite: A student body sweep to the middle, just like the Razorbacks would never do. You mens here with NO vision will scoff and say "Gimme don't know nothing!" But I say to you: THIS CAN HAPPEN. (annoying echo chamber again) Crazier things can happen. May I mention the name Campo? May I mention the name Ryan Leaf or "500 coaches could this team"? Now I see you all are trembling with the realization that yes, stranger things half happened and will happen. But all is not lost if Jerra is HC. Allow me to splain. 1. He will half to hire a GM (which he can overrule. but still we'd half another GM) 2. He will at last know the heartbreak of facing the cameras and the press after losing to the Falcons 54-3 ("Ah thought the student body sweep would -- after 15 times -- work. We failed and in the words of Romo, half to do better, and we will." 3. Jerra will lose so many games we will half the No. 1 draft pick for the next 5 years and boy, won't that be a team made up of 3 1st round RBs and 2 first round receivers. 4. Jerra will find hisself. At last he will no he is know HC or football guy. 5. Jerra, by losing so many games, will have many tax deductions if his bill on football loses is carried in congress by our esteamed senators. So, accept the mystery of Jerra. When he steps up to the podium and announces he named hisself head coach, you can say, "Gimme predicted THAT and he predicted jet packs for all Texas schoolchildren!" Give it a chance: The thought of Jerra coaching the Dallas Cowboys. The more I think about it the more I like it for the draft picks. Yes, some of you will say "drugs" or "midlife vices" or "aw, he's off his rocker" or worse. But when it happens dont come running to me because I will be in South Oak Cliff under a presumed name and alias. Discuss but don't thow stones. It be lonely at the top . . . But not on the sidelines!