I hate to post something so personal but support is needed

CouchCoach

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I am sure Ron will be back as soon as his head begins to clear. I went through it but I had a year to prepare for it and was still a basket case and unable to fix on one thought but if I did, that was the only thought I could focus on. It truly becomes a one foot in front of the other existence for a while.

This was unexpected and I can only imagine the additional overwhelming effect of that. I do believe that takes some additional time to deal with that part of it.

Ron, even if it's difficult to respond right now, you are in our hearts. Just know this, wherever you are right now, that is temporary. I know it feels as if life has ended and the grief is so strong that it's hard to breathe but that will subside in time. One thing that kept me going was repeating to myself, even out loud, "what would she want me to do"? I fixed myself on that over and over and it helped.
 

nightrain

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My wife passed away unexpectedly on Thursday. She was my life, my caregiver, and my soulmate. She nursed me along and cared for me through my heart surgeries this past year.
I went in to wake her up and she was unresponsive. After calling 911 all I could do is lay next to her and cry like a baby. I know many others have been through the same thing and may can offer some support. This is unbelievably surreal and painful.

Thanks for being a shoulder to lean on.
Very sorry your Wife passed, Ron. Wishing peace and comfort for you and your family. May your Wife rest in peace.
 

JW82

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My wife passed away unexpectedly on Thursday. She was my life, my caregiver, and my soulmate. She nursed me along and cared for me through my heart surgeries this past year.
I went in to wake her up and she was unresponsive. After calling 911 all I could do is lay next to her and cry like a baby. I know many others have been through the same thing and may can offer some support. This is unbelievably surreal and painful.

Thanks for being a shoulder to lean on.

wow. That is just terrible Ron. So very sorry for your loss. My wife and I are best friends, we have no kids and are inseparable. That thought is just a nightmare. Please take care of yourself and be sure to know, it's OK to have happiness as she would want that for you. Sending a prayer brother.
 

G2

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Unfortutately I know how you feel a bit and I am sorry to hear this. Time. Just time.
Well put sir. I've been through this and that's honestly the only thing I know for sure. Time.

That got me thinking. Another thing is trying to learn to go on and live without them physically, while honoring and savoring all the memories.
 

CouchCoach

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Well put sir. I've been through this and that's honestly the only thing I know for sure. Time.

That got me thinking. Another thing is trying to learn to go on and live without them physically, while honoring and savoring all the memories.
G, I agree but one must be careful with time and not just wait on that as I did. I, emotionally and mentally, stayed in one place and time could only stand still with me. It can be a friend but it needs help to do it's work.

Humans are social creatures, we are built to lean on each other and not go through the hardships alone. I didn't get that. I thought I was a lot stronger that I was. And in thinking that, I actually became weaker.

I didn't realize, and I hope Ron realizes this well before I did, that time was there right with me, begging me to move, to not stand still in one place to long because the darkness likes the lack of motion. Using time is the path to the light. And there are time guides available to us.
 

Corso

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My wife passed away unexpectedly on Thursday. She was my life, my caregiver, and my soulmate. She nursed me along and cared for me through my heart surgeries this past year.
I went in to wake her up and she was unresponsive. After calling 911 all I could do is lay next to her and cry like a baby. I know many others have been through the same thing and may can offer some support. This is unbelievably surreal and painful.

Thanks for being a shoulder to lean on.
My good friend... I am destroyed for you. I'm offering my number also.
So much love I'm trying to send your way.



You can call me a year from now at 3 in the morning. I don't care, my line is open.
 
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cowboy_ron

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My good friend... I am destroyed for you. I'm offering my number also.
So much love I'm trying to send your way.



You can call me a year from now at 3 in the morning. I don't care, my line is open.
Corso, I wish I could put into words how much your reaching out to me means to me. I've pretty much lost interest and the drive in everything. I thought it would improve much quicker than it has but I was wrong. The VA has been really good to me they call me every other day if not everyday.

I still look in here occasionally but my interest level is really low. Hopefully it'll get higher as the season heard.

Thanks again for your concern, I left my # on your VM.
 

Corso

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Corso, I wish I could put into words how much your reaching out to me means to me. I've pretty much lost interest and the drive in everything. I thought it would improve much quicker than it has but I was wrong. The VA has been really good to me they call me every other day if not everyday.

I still look in here occasionally but my interest level is really low. Hopefully it'll get higher as the season heard.

Thanks again for your concern, I left my # on your VM.
Saw it! I was cooking. So sorry. Not even done! Call you in the morrow, my friend.
Looking forward to it.
 

CouchCoach

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Corso, I wish I could put into words how much your reaching out to me means to me. I've pretty much lost interest and the drive in everything. I thought it would improve much quicker than it has but I was wrong. The VA has been really good to me they call me every other day if not everyday.

I still look in here occasionally but my interest level is really low. Hopefully it'll get higher as the season heard.

Thanks again for your concern, I left my # on your VM.
Allow yourself some time, ron. I knew a year ahead what was going to happen and still I was paralyzed for almost two years. Your loss was sudden and I think that carries it's own special healing needs.

I expected to get better sooner as well but I don't know why, there is no template for the pain of loss. Stay as strong as you can.
 

RustyBourneHorse

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My wife passed away unexpectedly on Thursday. She was my life, my caregiver, and my soulmate. She nursed me along and cared for me through my heart surgeries this past year.
I went in to wake her up and she was unresponsive. After calling 911 all I could do is lay next to her and cry like a baby. I know many others have been through the same thing and may can offer some support. This is unbelievably surreal and painful.

Thanks for being a shoulder to lean on.

I'm so sorry to hear that my friend. I'm so sorry. I will be praying for you. Please feel free to talk to me if you would like to do so.
 

John813

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My god, that's terrible. At first I though it was bad news about your surgery, but I didn't expect this.
My condolences.

What you're feeling is normal. You lost someone you loved deeply.
There's nothing that can be said to make you feel better or snap out of it. It's something that will take time to learn to accept and slowly develop a new normal.
 

Jake

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Somehow I'm just now seeing this thread. I haven't had much luck with marriages so I can only imagine the grief you feel. Looks like there are others here who can relate.

My condolences to all of you. It's one thing to have never had something, it's quite another to have it and then lose it.
 
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