The Pirate Ship is Docking at Cowboys Stadium!

Pittman4Two

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Good morning ladies and friends,

Well, the season has officially started and now the time is nye for the Pewter Pirates to run a muck throughout the entire NFL League. At this point in the season, it feels good to be .500, but to have the knowledge to know that we were one or two replacement ref muff calls away from 2-0 is saddening, yet frustrating. The team is as alive and vibrant as the colors red and pewter. This should be a competitive affair with a somewhat equal opponent.

As you know, the Dallas Cowboys won their first game earlier this year. I'm sure the fans were happy to finally raise their arms in victory. Be beforewarned however, this is an early season. You'd hate to see complacency or comfortableness give the team a black eye after getting punched in the eye. Judging from the multiple articles and internet bloggings, it appears your coach's first priority is to put a W in the win column.

Let's see how these teams matchup (or don't matchup in this case):

When the Buccanneers have the ball...

Josh Freeman has become a household name talked about around the dinner table in many homes in America. In that case, I would almost call him America's quarterback. I'll hold off on that praise until we eclipse that second or third win. Doug Martin's running technique reminds those experts like myself of a young Christian Okoye. Same size, same speed, same elusiveness...he can lower the boom when necessary. I went back and watched some youtube videos of his tendencies. Every video I saw was Doug running by defenders and scoring touchdowns. Perfect recipe for success. Now...Vincent Jackson, Mike Williams, and Sammie Stroughter or the "Triple Hits" (notice I didn't call them the triplets because a lot of you may or may not remember Brad Johnson, Keyshawn Johnson, and Michael Pittman). These guys have speed and catching ability unparralleled with any other WR tandem in this league. I'm not biased...just look at the numbers.

Look for Donald Penn to again have his way with DeMarcus Ware. As you can see from the box score, Ware has not had a sack against TB since last season and if he did have a sack then, I'm sure he was off sides since he loves cheating by running off sides. I had trouble recognizing your linebacking corpse...Sean Lee? Bruce Carter? What happened to Brookings? I remember him running from the field to the sideline in every game. It will be an undertaking to replace that void.

ADVANTAGE: Bucs


When the Cowboys play defense...

Let's not beat around a bush here...everyone knows in the free country that Mike Jenkins played some ball down here at USF. We saw with our first hand what he can do on the field. Look for Schiano to exploit the other half of the secondary for some big gains and yardage. Luke Stocker makes a living by finding soft zones and eluding manned coverage. That's his fortay. I shudder to think what the limitations on this offense could be (if any). Carl Nicks was a huge free agent acquisition from free agency. I call him a road grader because he's big like those large pieces of machinery that dig up the old roads and then clear it out so the other things can come in and drop the asphalt on the ground. That asphalt is LeGarrette Blount.

ADVANTAGE: Bucs


Summarization

OK, so after typing all of that (and you reading with full undivided attention), the parody between both teams is slim to none. The age of the Cowboys will come back to haunt them for this game. They probably can't keep up with our speed and intensity. Schiano prides himself on playing hard until that final whistle blows. I see a tight game that becomes loose by the end.


Prognostic Stats:

Freeman: 14-19, 312 yards, 2 TD's, 0 picks
Blount: 23 rushes, 119 yards, 2 TD's, 0 picks
Martin: 13 rushes, 98 yards, 1 TD, 0 picks
Jackson: 7 catches, 122 yards, 3 TD's, 0 picks, 1 INT
Romo: 2-19, 210 yards, 0 TD's, 1 pick, 3 INT's
Murray: 19 rushes, 55 yards, 2 TD's, 0 picks
Bryant: 5 catches, 11 yards, 1 TD, 0 picks
Witten: 8 catches, 31 yards, 2 TD's, 0 picks

Final Score:

Bucs 27
Cowboys 13


Thoughts?
 

Faerluna

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I've been waiting for this post all week. I can rest easy now. :D
 

ETex

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Thanks friend or as we say down here in Tejas, Gracias amigo. I've been awaiting your post!
 

Kilyin

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I especially enjoyed Carl Nicks was a huge free agent acquisition from free agency. I call him a road grader because he's big like those large pieces of machinery that dig up the old roads and then clear it out so the other things can come in and drop the asphalt on the ground. That asphalt is LeGarrette Blount.

:bow: :lmao: :laugh2:
 

jazzcat22

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Enjoy the enthusiasm....but not in our house.....:D

Even though in another post I said 20-17 TB on last minute FG....but now since I had a good nights sleep on it....

Cowboys 27 Pewters 10
 

dragon_mikal

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I know this is supposed to be lighthearted and funny but my sense of humor was killed last Sunday by the Seahawks.

I don't see the Cowboys winning this game.
 

AMERICAS_FAN

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Welcome back bro! The pirate ship may shoot canons but it's no match for the Cowboys drone strikes. :D

As long as Dallas doesn't point those drones to themselves, I think we'll be allright. :bang2:

By the way, Mike Jenkins is a backup now. We have a whole new upgraded set of CBs that will make sure your QB never becomes America's QB. :)
 

BrAinPaiNt

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Heisenberg;4741304 said:
I like Romo's stats. Those are a couple of seriously long completions. :D

I prefer his int to picks ratio
 

Doomsday

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I went back and watched some youtube videos of his tendencies. Every video I saw was Doug running by defenders and scoring touchdowns. Perfect recipe for success.

That is awesome, thanks for laugh, I needed one.
 

Kilyin

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BrAinPaiNt;4741308 said:
I prefer his int to picks ratio

I guess he found out about Ryan's new defensive defense package scheme featuring Romo as the elephant-man linebacker.
 

Apollo Creed

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http://i1053.***BLOCKED***/albums/s467/mobu000/Gif/the_rock_clap_clap_gif.gif
 

Mr Cowboy

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Murray and Witten each score 2 TD's and Dez scores one, yet we lose 27-13?

Sounds like Jethroe's 6th grade educated deciphering!
 
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