Official 2006 Excuse Guide For Mike Zimmer.

Wolverine

Zimmer Hater
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If Mike Zimmer is back for 2006 I have decided I would be nice and help out the Zimmer lovers in here who think Mike Zimmer is the greatest DC the NFL has ever seen and he can do no wrong.

The thing is their excuses for Zimmer are old and just lame. I am not sure if I should laugh or cry now when I read there same ol laughable excuses for this guy. So I thought I would help them get started with some excuses they can use for Mike Zimmer for the 2006 season. Here they go.


Mike Zimmer was 3 minutes late to the 1st minicamp and that threw off the whole season.

The NFL called Mike Zimmer and told him he was to good and that he needed to hold back so the other teams could have a chance.

The year is 2006 and poor Mike Zimmer....did you know the number 2006 is his bad luck number just like some peeps think the # 13 is bad luck.

A virus destroyed Mike Zimmers computer and it destroyed all his game plans.

Chuck Norris kicked Mike Zimmer in the head and he never recovered in nuff time.

Chuck Norris lightning punched Zimmer KOin him and he never recovered in nuff time.


Mike Zimmer woke up on the wrong side of bed the day of the game and it threw off the game plan.

D-Ware T-New Spears and Roy Williams are all busts. No DC would ever have a chance at havin a good defense with garbage like this.


Sundays are Mike Zimmers bad luck day. If the game was played any other day Mike Zimmers defense would not even allow a 1st down.


If the other team should ever score more then 3 points it was cuz Mike Zimmer was tryin a new game plan. That would be the only reason we did not shut them out.

If the other team scores more then 20 points then it was cuz one of the other teams players stole Mike Zimmers game plans.


Here is a great excuse for the end of the 2006 season........this was really Mike Zimmers 1st year with the 3-4. Here is why. You see in 2005 and in 2006 our defense spent less then 1/2 the game on the field. So really a whole game only counts as half a game. So really Mike Zimmer had a little less then 8 games for 2005 and less then 8 games for 2006. So after a few games in 2007 he will finally have 1 year in the 3-4.


Chuck Norris kicked the game plans from Zimmers hand to the moon.

Chuck Norris used his lightning fast hands to take the game plans right outta Zimmers hands and to the other teams hands.


When the Cowboys were on a road game Mike Zimmer got stuck on a metal chair instead of a leather chair. It threw off his game plan.





Ok.....now thats a start for you Zimmer lovers who think Zimmer is perfect and the greatest DC ever and the greatest DC there ever will be. You know who you are.


Hopefully these excuses will help cuz the ones you are usin now are so old and lame you need all the help you can get.
 

Bob Sacamano

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I keep hearing how aggressive Greg Williams would make our D be if he were our D-coordinator, so I decided to look up each team's defensive rankings for this regular season, and I chose the 2 most important ones, scoring D, and takeaways....pretty interesting results came up

note: Zimmer's 1st year calling 3-4 defensive plays, and starting 2 rookies and 2 1st year players all 16 games, as opposed to Williams 2nd year running the Skin's 4-3, w/ only 1 1st year player starting all 16 games

Washington Commander's scoring D, 2005:

18.3 ppg allowed, gave up 32 TDs

Dallas Cowboy's scoring D, 2005:

19.2 ppg allowed, gave up 35 TDs

Commander takeaways, 2005:

28; 16 INTs, 12 fumbles

Cowboy takeaways, 2005:

26; 15 INTs, 11 fumbles

Commander's total defensive ranking: 9th

Cowboy's total defensive ranking: 10th



shoot, here's some more

average yards per play Washington allowed:

4.9

average yards per play Dallas allowed:

5.1

rushing D, Commanders:13th Cowboys: 15th

rushing yards allowed per game, Commanders:

105.4

Dallas:

108.2

average yards per carry against Commander D:

4.1

average yards per carry against Cowboy D:

4.2

rushing TDs against Commander D:

15

Dallas:

13

20+ yard runs against Commander D:

11

Dallas:

7

Pass D, Washington: 10th, Dallas: 11th

passing yards per game allowed, Commanders:

192.6

Dallas:

192.7

passing TDs allowed, Commanders:

15

Dallas:

18

SACKS, Washington:

35

Dallas:

37



so is Greg WIlliams that much better than Zimmer?
 

Bob Sacamano

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I keep hearing how aggressive Greg Williams would make our D be if he were our D-coordinator, so I decided to look up each team's defensive rankings for this regular season, and I chose the 2 most important ones, scoring D, and takeaways....pretty interesting results came up

note: Zimmer's 1st year calling 3-4 defensive plays, and starting 2 rookies and 2 1st year players all 16 games, as opposed to Williams 2nd year running the Skin's 4-3, w/ only 1 1st year player starting all 16 games

Washington Commander's scoring D, 2005:

18.3 ppg allowed, gave up 32 TDs

Dallas Cowboy's scoring D, 2005:

19.2 ppg allowed, gave up 35 TDs

Commander takeaways, 2005:

28; 16 INTs, 12 fumbles

Cowboy takeaways, 2005:

26; 15 INTs, 11 fumbles

Commander's total defensive ranking: 9th

Cowboy's total defensive ranking: 10th



shoot, here's some more

average yards per play Washington allowed:

4.9

average yards per play Dallas allowed:

5.1

rushing D, Commanders:13th Cowboys: 15th

rushing yards allowed per game, Commanders:

105.4

Dallas:

108.2

average yards per carry against Commander D:

4.1

average yards per carry against Cowboy D:

4.2

rushing TDs against Commander D:

15

Dallas:

13

20+ yard runs against Commander D:

11

Dallas:

7

Pass D, Washington: 10th, Dallas: 11th

passing yards per game allowed, Commanders:

192.6

Dallas:

192.7

passing TDs allowed, Commanders:

15

Dallas:

18

SACKS, Washington:

35

Dallas:

37
 

Wolverine

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Another Mike Zimmer excuse.



Greg Williams stole Mike Zimmers game plans and that is why his defense has more sacks and turnovers then Mike Zimmers.


If Chuck Norris played LB for Mike Zimmer...then Mike Zimmers defense would lead the NFL in sacks and turnovers every year.




And here are some Mike Zimmer facts -


Mike Zimmer taught Tom Landry everything he knows and was really behind those great Cowboy teams.

Mike Zimmer taught Jimmy Johnson everything he knows. That is the only reason Jimmy Johnson won 2 Super Bowls.

Mike Zimmer carried Barry Switzer to his Super Bowl win.


If we did not have Mike Zimmer.....the Cowboys would not have won ever been in the Super Bowl.


The 4 coaches that have their teams in the Championships this year....Mike Zimmer taught them everything they know.
 

Bob Sacamano

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I keep hearing how aggressive Greg Williams would make our D be if he were our D-coordinator, so I decided to look up each team's defensive rankings for this regular season, and I chose the 2 most important ones, scoring D, and takeaways....pretty interesting results came up

note: Zimmer's 1st year calling 3-4 defensive plays, and starting 2 rookies and 2 1st year players all 16 games, as opposed to Williams 2nd year running the Skin's 4-3, w/ only 1 1st year player starting all 16 games

Washington Commander's scoring D, 2005:

18.3 ppg allowed, gave up 32 TDs

Dallas Cowboy's scoring D, 2005:

19.2 ppg allowed, gave up 35 TDs

Commander takeaways, 2005:

28; 16 INTs, 12 fumbles

Cowboy takeaways, 2005:

26; 15 INTs, 11 fumbles

Commander's total defensive ranking: 9th

Cowboy's total defensive ranking: 10th



shoot, here's some more

average yards per play Washington allowed:

4.9

average yards per play Dallas allowed:

5.1

rushing D, Commanders:13th Cowboys: 15th

rushing yards allowed per game, Commanders:

105.4

Dallas:

108.2

average yards per carry against Commander D:

4.1

average yards per carry against Cowboy D:

4.2

rushing TDs against Commander D:

15

Dallas:

13

20+ yard runs against Commander D:

11

Dallas:

7

Pass D, Washington: 10th, Dallas: 11th

passing yards per game allowed, Commanders:

192.6

Dallas:

192.7

passing TDs allowed, Commanders:

15

Dallas:

18

SACKS, Washington:

35

Dallas:

37



\
 

Wolverine

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Mike Holmgren was a nobody till Mike Zimmer taught him everything he knows.

Payton Manning
Donovan McNabb
Tom Brady

None of them would be the best QBs in the NFL if they did not have secret meetings with Mike Zimmer and learn from him how to be the best QBs.


Terry Bradshaw
Joe Montana
Troy Aikman
Tom Brady

The only QBs with 3 or more Super Bowl wins......if they were not secretly coached by Mike Zimmer they never woulda won any Super Bowls.
 

BigDFan5

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SkinsandTerps said:
Wow. Talk about a disappointing thread.


Watching Wolverine hide from facts is like watching dogs have sex. It catches your attention at first, but then you realize its just wrong to watch something so pathetic
 

Wolverine

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They should change the name of the Vince Lombardi Trophy to the Mike Zimmer Trophy.
 

Future

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Wolverine said:
They should change the name of the Vince Lombardi Trophy to the Mike Zimmer Trophy.

i was annoyed until that post lol
 

Juke99

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4) Personal attacks or insults directed at other members of this site are not allowed. Name calling and commentary about another user's family, intelligence, etc. are all considered personal in nature. Violating this guideline will result in your account being suspended or banned.



Let's keep this in mind, ok?
 

BigDFan5

Cowboys Make me Drink
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Juke99 said:
4) Personal attacks or insults directed at other members of this site are not allowed. Name calling and commentary about another user's family, intelligence, etc. are all considered personal in nature. Violating this guideline will result in your account being suspended or banned.



Let's keep this in mind, ok?


I have it in mind sir
 

marsbennett

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summerisfunner said:
you thought this thread had any promise to begin with? shame on you :lmao2:
It sure got off to a good start. I really got a laugh outta some of those.
 
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