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Paul Alexander wrote a book and he grades offensive linemen by how they squeeze ketchup

Discussion in 'Fan Zone' started by waving monkey, May 18, 2018.

  1. waving monkey

    waving monkey Well-Known Member

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    Excitement concerning the Dallas Cowboys offensive line was rejuvenated this offseason when the team drafted Connor Williams in the second round.

    Connor would surely help the unit get back to being the best in the NFL, at least that was the thought most had. Not that this isn’t true, but Connor is the second big-time piece to land with the men up front this offseason.

    Dallas exchanged offensive line coaches with the Cincinnati Bengals, Frank Pollack for Paul Alexander. It wasn’t a literal trade, just one that happened out of coincidence. Neat.

    You know what else is neat, though? Paul Alexander. I’m literally talking about Paul Alexander the human being. CowboysCast’s Bobby Belt found a goldmine of nuggets on Wednesday evening.

    https://www.bloggingtheboys.com/201...en-by-how-they-squeeze-ketchup-dallas-cowboys
     
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  2. gp_cowpolk

    gp_cowpolk Landry Hat Zone Supporter

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    How does he grade offensive linemen that do not eat ketchup?
     
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  3. Pompey-Cowboy

    Pompey-Cowboy Well-Known Member

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    I grade my wives on how vigorously they mash potatoes.
     
  4. gp_cowpolk

    gp_cowpolk Landry Hat Zone Supporter

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    Or the way they squeeze mangoes Hard to beat a good pork puller though
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2018
  5. vicjagger

    vicjagger Well-Known Member

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    That SI article was awesome.
     
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  6. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    I've certainly changed up my approach on where it comes to squeezing the mustard bottle,,,ever since I'd shook that bottle in a tossoff fashion and it shot yards down the counter of that out of state truck stop diner ,,,that one time,,,er,,,it didn't make me all that popular with my fellow road men at the time either o_O



    * all true*:lmao2:
     
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  7. Bullflop

    Bullflop Well-Known Member

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    On the surface, it really seems absurd to use squeezing a ketchup bottle to grade an o-lineman. Oddly enough, the explanation is somewhat believable, somehow. I'm still pretty sure I'd be reluctant to reveal that idea for public consumption (for fear of being committed.);)
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2018
  8. 3rd_n_inches

    3rd_n_inches Well-Known Member

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    They don’t get past phase 1. You literally have to eat a bottle of ketchup to make it in his system.
     
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  9. 3rd_n_inches

    3rd_n_inches Well-Known Member

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  10. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    Being a Concert Hall pianist is kinda 'weird',,,as I'm hereby torn on either the Clint Eastwood ' play misty for me' & that flamboyantly foppish Liberace,,,,:huh:



    * ya,his boys couldn't cut the mustard when they last squared off against us,but he's OUR guy now:starspin::thumbup::starspin:
     
  11. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    Um-hum!

    :lmao::lmao2::lmao:



    *that slingblade post is pretty Hilarious:lmao2:
     
  12. northerncowboynation

    northerncowboynation Well-Known Member

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    Tease me, squeeze me... you know what I like!!
     
  13. JackOfNoTrades

    JackOfNoTrades sunbum

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    I was at a Round Table event recently where local HR executives discussed the job market and shared insights on the hiring process from their perspective. This ketchup story reminds me of one of the stories a participant told.

    In short and during the hiring process, they took the prospect out to lunch for some candid discussions and setting. The HR Mgr. noticed that after the food arrived, the prospect immediately applied salt and pepper to her food. He noticed this action and took issue on how someone could do such a thing w/o tasting the food first. As a result, the prospect was passed upon because in his words/opinion "she made uninformed decisions".

    The entire room was was perplexed, he looked like a dope and many of his piers and those in attendance remarked to this story that his company is probably not somewhere one would want to work. lol Was actually pretty funny.
     
  14. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    Hey there ,my canuckish fellow!
    Have you really made 3100 posts since January?,,,:huh:,,,or is that a glitch in the matrix being presented due to that LHC/ CERN casing-liner's activity?o_O
     
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  15. northerncowboynation

    northerncowboynation Well-Known Member

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    Damn brah, yes apparently that's the count. What a waste of time eh! I'm building up trophy points for my trophy case. Figgered if the Eagles got a trophy, I deserved one:banghead:
     
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  16. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    :lmao2: ya, that's a tool-ish approach to utilize in compiling a yes/no call on a prospective hire,man! I'll always salt&pepper my mashed potatoes & green beans before samplingo_O


    * except for my 'momma's' it was always rock solid:thumbup:
     
  17. Melonfeud

    Melonfeud I Copy!,,, er,,,I guess,,,ah,,,maybe. Zone Supporter

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    :lmao2::yourock::lmao2:

    *I'm glad yer' here,friend:thumbup:



    :starspin:o_O:starspin:
     
  18. 3rd_n_inches

    3rd_n_inches Well-Known Member

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    Apparently During interviews with the Dental school you go out to eat with some of the students that they select as their “get to know you group”. I shall take notes.
    lmao Ain’t got no gas in it um-hum. Sling Blade aka the movie from my child hood I will show my kids so they can wonder why I can’t stop laughing throught the movie.
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2018
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  19. ghst187

    ghst187 Well-Known Member

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    I suppose a Hebrew King once judged warriors by how they drank water from a stream....
    Worked out okay for him....
     
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  20. JackOfNoTrades

    JackOfNoTrades sunbum

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    you must also have seconds or she'll suspect somethings up!
     
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