Bad Christmas gifts

Discussion in 'Off-topic Zone' started by KJJ, Nov 14, 2009.

  1. KJJ

    KJJ You Have an Axe to Grind

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    It's getting about that time to start thinking about Christmas shopping. You find out just how someone really feels about you by the type of gift they give you for Christmas. No gift says screw YOU like a Chia pet. That has to be the worst gift in history, especially for Christmas. I would be less offended if someone forgot me than to receive one of those. What the hell kind of enjoyment can someone get from a Chia pet? We all had a day when even a slinky or some silly putty could keep us entertained for an hour but C'mon! What pisses me off about receiving a Chia pet is you know the person who sent it must have just completed their Christmas shopping and was at the checkout line when they spotted them and thought "Oh I forgot about **** head!" Another Christmas gift that says "I could care less but felt obligated" are those sausage sampler boxes. We've all seen them they have a variety of sausages, cheeses, crackers and if the person who sent it had a heart and dug deep and splurged a couple of extra bucks you'll get a small container of jelly with it.

    I've actually received a few of those. :mad: Honestly I don't mind receiving them anymore because you can just put them away and give them out the following Christmas. :p: I find they really cut down on your Christmas shopping every year and they make an excellent gift for a relative you haven't seen in years. I have an uncle I haven't seen in 15 years and he sends me one every year. I just rewrap it and send it back to him the following Christmas. :tongue: We've been sending it back and forth to each other for over a decade. A couple of years ago I had a cousin send me an ant farm....MERRY CHRISTMAS! :mad: It included a glass case, a bag of dirt and a jar of worker ants. What the hell kind of gift is that to give a 35 yr old man? My Mom told me to be nice and send him something to make it at least appear like I care so I debated between a korky universal flapper tank ball for his toilet or a top of the line enema bag that included a comfort nozzle and a solution to cleanse his colon. I opted for the tank ball. :D
  2. LeonDixson

    LeonDixson Illegitimi non carborundum

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    That had me literally lol. I've got tears in my eyes. It sounds like something Dave Barry would right. I love that guy's stuff.
  3. Cowboy Brian

    Cowboy Brian Augmented. Zone Supporter

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    Im loling irl
  4. CliffnMesquite

    CliffnMesquite Well-Known Member

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    I always hated getting socks. Then when I grew up and didn't have any socks my feet were cold. :(
  5. rkell87

    rkell87 Well-Known Member

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    a card with nothing in it.
    my pawpaw got me a buddle of switches(yay!) one year to use one on me every time i was bad...this was the same year my uncle got all the kids an 8" bamboo reed blowpipe and a huge bag of corn... i went through 4 switches that day
  6. Duane

    Duane Well-Known Member

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  7. CowboyFan74

    CowboyFan74 Cowboys Analyst

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    Thanks..:lmao2: :lmao2: :lmao2: :lmao2: :lmao2:
  8. Yeagermeister

    Yeagermeister Active Member

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    One year I send my best friend a rack of hot know the insanity types...He said he tasted a small drop of one and it almost killed him. :laugh1:
  9. Sam I Am

    Sam I Am Unfriendly and Aloof!

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    I will send you a Chia **** for Christmas. At least it will appear as though you have some pubes! :laugh2:
  10. KJJ

    KJJ You Have an Axe to Grind

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    I'll be sending you a copy of this to add to your collection. :p:


  11. KJJ

    KJJ You Have an Axe to Grind

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    Here's a few gift ideas that have hidden meanings behind them.

    This dead body towel would make a great gift if you know anyone who's in the mafia. You just better hope they have a sense of humor. :pray:


    A face and butt towel would make an excellent gift for a family member or roommate who struggles with poor hygiene. :gassy1:


    This would make a terrific gift for someone who has trouble tying a tie. :p:


    Man these as seen on TV people come up with everything. Nothing more entertaining than a talking toilet paper roller. Just imagine the hours of pleasure that could bring to someone special in your life. :shades:


    This gift is great if you know an avid golfer who spends alot of time in the bathroom. Send them this along with the talking toilet paper roller and they can turn their bathroom into an entertainment room. :dance3:

  12. hairic

    hairic Well-Known Member

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    One year, I gave sweets to a diabetic.

    That was a fail.
  13. bbgun

    bbgun Benched

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  14. Teren_Kanan

    Teren_Kanan Well-Known Member

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    Whatever you do, please don't buy your kids clothing for Christmas or Birthdays. Making "gifts" out of things you as a parent, are responsible for buying anyways (and would have to buy regardless of a Holiday) is cheap, and lame. Stop it.

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