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Outdoor Christmas Decorations Violation List

Discussion in 'Off-topic Zone' started by Juke99, Dec 14, 2009.

  1. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    I don't post very often but this is a time of year that is so important, I can't help myself.

    As I drive around, every year I notice homes that are decorated, clearly breaking an unwritten code (mine) of acceptability.

    Each year I promise myself that I am going to compose a written checklist, check off the items that are in violation, after I review a decorated home, and drop off the citation in the mailbox.

    The violation list is not going to cite sloppy decorating, strings of bulbs that hang rather than being affixed in a straight line...it's more of a set of foundational rules.

    For starters:

    NO BLINKING ICICLE LIGHTS! What's the point? They're supposed to look like icicles. Do icicles blink? NO!

    ONLY ONE SANTA PER HOUSE. There is only one Santa. Ya can't have TWO on your lawn.

    When connecting lights to a tree that is away from the house, you have to remove the lights in the connecting string OR just use an extension chord...otherwise, your home looks like a used car lot.

    Mixing bulbs. A biggie of mine. If you're going to use those little twinkly bulbs, then that's what you use. You can't use little twinkly bulbs and then big old fashion retro bulbs on the same house.

    I have several more...but I'd like you to join in with yours. Since I am the self elected Outdoor Christmas Decorations Sheriff, I reserve the right to dismiss or alter any suggestions. :)

    Thank you in advance for your participation.
  2. CowboyFan74

    CowboyFan74 Cowboys Analyst

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    You know this is the 1st year in memory where I have seen a house with two Santa's, I need to write my neighbors a citation..:laugh2:
  3. Sarge

    Sarge Happy New Year! Staff Member

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    I think the blow up snowmen and Santas are really cheesy.
  4. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    Nope. Sorry.

    This kind of thing doesn't make the list.

    You might not like a decoration but there is no violation.

    Now, if there were TWO blow up Santas, that would be a different story.
  5. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    Thank you for being a concerned citizen.
  6. CowboyFan74

    CowboyFan74 Cowboys Analyst

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    Yeager has two blow up santas...:D
  7. Bob Sacamano

    Bob Sacamano Benched

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    [youtube]mt9CrVwZNMQ[/youtube]
  8. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    and I'm he's got an array of blow up Mrs. Santas.
  9. Sarge

    Sarge Happy New Year! Staff Member

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    I disagree - it's clear waste of latex.
  10. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    You're not allowed to "disagree" if you want to start your own "Cheesy Christmas decorations thread" that's fine.

    I'm in charge here. ;) :D
  11. Faerluna

    Faerluna I'm Complicated

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    I don't like blinking or running lights, period. They remind me of bodega lights. They look trashy.

    Apologies to anyone that currently uses blinking or running lights. :p:
  12. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    I'll allow blinking lights, but running lights, very good point. NG. I'm gonna add it to my list. Looks like the lighting on the runway at JFK airport.
  13. cowboyeric8

    cowboyeric8 Chicks dig crutches

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    I recieved this e-mail. I'm not sure if it true or not, but either way it is funny.

    [IMG]

    "Good news is that I truly out did myself this year with my Christmas decorations. The bad news is that I had to take him down after 2 days. I had more people come screaming up to my house than ever.Great stories. But two things made me take it down.

    First, the cops advised me that it would cause traffic accidents as they almost wrecked when they drove by.

    Second, a 55 year old lady grabbed the 75 pound ladder almost killed herself putting it against my house and didn't realize it was fake until she climbed to the top (she was not happy). By the way, she was one of many people who attempted to do that. My yard couldn't take it either. I have more than a few tire tracks where people literally drove up my yard."
  14. Signals

    Signals Suspicious looking stranger

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    I really enjoy trees and trunks that are loaded with lights, but it really looks stupid when only a third of them blink. Thats serious violation. Inconsistent color combinations and blinking. Example; a framed window with 63% blue blinkers and 37% continuously illuminated purple lights. Lame.

    I also have a few Christmas tree decorating rules as well. Never over decorate a tree. Trees that are totally covered with decorations that don't match are a Signals decorating code violation.
  15. Hostile

    Hostile Tacos are a good investment Zone Supporter

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    Christmas is my least favorite holiday. My wife and kids love it. My only rule is, I will get the boxes out, I will put them away, but don't ask me to decorate.
  16. Dallas

    Dallas Old bulletproof tiger

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    Boooo you are no fun.


    Im sending you a box of Dunkin Coalnuts.


    Happy unfortunate holiday for you, Hos...er Grinch. :D
  17. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    I have another one that I noticed last night. It’s the “Almost Merry Christmas” infraction. I saw, on two occasions, trees with lights halfway up. The message to the viewer, “Hey, I don’t have the interest in taking out the ladder to finish the job…so I put the lights as far as I could reach”

    “Almost Merry Christmas”
  18. StanleySpadowski

    StanleySpadowski Active Member

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    No more than 20% of a yard's square footage may be covered with decorations.


    Very few things are as unsightly as yards that look as though they're selling decorations because they're so full.
  19. Juke99

    Juke99 ...Abbey someone

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    Definitely adding this one to the list.
  20. dcdallaschick

    dcdallaschick Member

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