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Somali Pirates in Discussions to Acquire Citigroup

Discussion in 'Political Zone' started by MilesAustinforMVP, Nov 21, 2008.

  1. MilesAustinforMVP

    MilesAustinforMVP Benched

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    Somali Pirates in Discussions to Acquire Citigroup


    By Andreas Hippin
    November 20 (Bloomberg) -- The Somali pirates, renegade Somalis known for hijacking ships for ransom in the Gulf of Aden, are negotiating a purchase of Citigroup.

    The pirates would buy Citigroup with new debt and their existing cash stockpiles, earned most recently from hijacking numerous ships, including most recently a $200 million Saudi Arabian oil tanker. The Somali pirates are offering up to $0.10 per share for Citigroup, pirate spokesman Sugule Ali said earlier today. The negotiations have entered the final stage, Ali said.

    "You may not like our price, but we are not in the business of paying for things. Be happy we are in the mood tooffer the shareholders anything," said Ali.

    The pirates will finance part of the purchase by selling new Pirate Ransom Backed Securities. The PRBS's are backed by the cash flows from future ransom payments from hijackings in the Gulf of Aden. Moody's and S&P have already issued their top investment grade ratings for the PRBS's.

    Head pirate, Ubu Kalid Shandu, said: "We need a bank so that we have a place to keep all of our ransom money. Thankfully, the dislocations in the capital markets has allowed us to purchase Citigroup

    at an attractive valuation and to take advantage of TARP capital to grow the business even faster."

    Shandu added, "We don't call ourselves pirates. We are coastguards and this will just allow us to guard our coasts better."

    *CITI IN TALKS WITH SOMALI PIRATES FOR POSSIBLE CAPITAL INFUSION
    *WILL REQUIRE ALL CITI EMPLOYEES TO WEAR PATCH OVER ONE EYE
    *SOMALIAN PIRATES APPLY TO BECOME BANK TO ACCESS TARP
    *PAULSON: TARP PIRATE EQUITY IS AN `INVESTMENT,' WILL PAY OFF
    *KASHKARI SAYS `SOMALI PIRATES ARE 'FUNDAMENTALLY SOUND' '
    *Moody's upgrade Somali Pirates to AAA
    *HUD SAYS SOMALI DHOW FORECLOSURE PROGRAM HAD `VERY LOW' PARTICPATION
    *SOMALI PIRATES IN DISCUSSION TO ACQUIRE CITIBANK
    *FED OFFICIALS: AGGRESSIVE EASING WOULD CUT SOMALI PIRATE RISK
    * FED AGREED OCT. 29 TO TAKE `WHATEVER STEPS' NEEDED FOR SOMALI PIRATES


    http://www.theglobeandmail.com/serv...streetwise20081121112035/WBStory/WBstreetwise
  2. BrAinPaiNt

    BrAinPaiNt Bad Santa Staff Member

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    :laugh2: @PRBS...wonder if I could invest in those. :D

    Also They are not coastguards they are just legit trading ships with Letters of Marque.
    :p:
  3. Phrozen Phil

    Phrozen Phil Active Member

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    I wonder what shareholders meetings are like in that organization? ARRRRRRgh :D
  4. JiggsCasey

    JiggsCasey Benched

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    joke stories aside...

    Citigroup IS on the verge of complete collapse... and when that corrupt giant falls, it's "look out below!!!!"

    I predict Citi will die within 1 month... You heard it here...

    And that will be huge news.
  5. MilesAustinforMVP

    MilesAustinforMVP Benched

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    This whole financial crisis is like the ending to fight club.
  6. JiggsCasey

    JiggsCasey Benched

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    Ah yes... One of my favorite films of all-time...

    "where is my mind? wheeeeeeeeeeere is myyyyyyyyyy mind?"

    [youtube]HnBJBaHbwak[/youtube]
  7. MilesAustinforMVP

    MilesAustinforMVP Benched

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    I am partial to the pixies myself.
  8. burmafrd

    burmafrd Well-Known Member

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    pretty sad comment on Jiggssy that he is looking forward to citi group failing and thousands more losing their jobs. So much for liberal compassion.
  9. Rogah

    Rogah Well-Known Member

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    Well they certainly couldn't do a worse job of running it than current management :(
  10. JiggsCasey

    JiggsCasey Benched

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    Hey there, one-sentence hit-and-runner.... good to see you're back following me around the forum. Anyhow, when you're done making up stuff, let me know where I ever said I was "looking forward" to Citi's collapse, or that people would lose their jobs...

    Is this about all you have in your arsenal? Fabrication? Run along now, adults are talking.

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