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The Hormone Warning!

Discussion in 'Off-topic Zone' started by Signals, Nov 2, 2004.

  1. Signals

    Signals Suspicious looking stranger

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    The Hormone Warning


    THE HORMONE WARNING:The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!


    DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
    SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
    SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
    ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

    DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
    SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
    SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
    ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

    DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
    SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
    SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
    ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

    DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
    SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
    SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
    ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

    DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
    SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
    SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
    ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.

    13 Things PMS Stands For

    1. Pass My Shotgun
    2. Psychotic Mood Shift
    3. Perpetual Munching Spree
    4. Puffy Mid-Section
    5. People Make me Sick
    6. Provide Me with Sweets
    7. Pardon My Sobbing
    8. Pimples May Surface
    9. Pass My Sweatpants
    10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
    11. Plainly; Men Suck
    12. Pack My Stuff
    13. Potential Murder Suspect

    For all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good Laugh!
    Or for men who need a warning.

    Remember: Money talks.... But Chocolate sings
  2. SoTex

    SoTex Giddy Up

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    El Oh El. That's funny stuff. :D
  3. trickblue

    trickblue Old Testament... Zone Supporter

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    Poor Men Suffer...
  4. SoTex

    SoTex Giddy Up

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    Practically Makes Sense
    :D
  5. CowboyPrincess

    CowboyPrincess Priceless

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    Pleasing Men Survive...
  6. SoTex

    SoTex Giddy Up

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    Nice........ :D
  7. The30YardSlant

    The30YardSlant Benched

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    Men are so overated.....
  8. trickblue

    trickblue Old Testament... Zone Supporter

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    Are you a chick? :eek:
  9. The30YardSlant

    The30YardSlant Benched

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    LOL no :D
  10. CowboyPrincess

    CowboyPrincess Priceless

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    he's trying to make brownie points with us female posters.... :D
  11. trickblue

    trickblue Old Testament... Zone Supporter

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    I am making you an honorary chick for that statement... :D
  12. CowboyPrincess

    CowboyPrincess Priceless

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    Play nice now Trick...LOL :D
  13. BrAinPaiNt

    BrAinPaiNt Brotherhood of the Beard Staff Member

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    Damn Oprah Junkies ;) :p
  14. Signals

    Signals Suspicious looking stranger

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    If smart men only knew how right you are, this world would be a better place.

    CP you hit the nail on the head.

    In other words humility and understanding pays great dividends.
  15. The30YardSlant

    The30YardSlant Benched

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    Maybe, but whos the one driving a brand new FREE car...Thats what I thought ;)
  16. jacs

    jacs I'd Hit It

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    its not nice to be calling someone names :D
  17. CowboyPrincess

    CowboyPrincess Priceless

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    I have told that to every man I know and they still piss off their wives or girlfriends... or both...LOL cuz they don't practice what I'm preaching to them... when a woman reaches for midol... get your list of compliments and yes honeys out and you will survive long enough to continue sharing a bed for another month. Otherwise.... DUCK!! :D

    Funny thing is I scare them cuz I don't get vocal, argry or whine... I get quiet and clean everything in the apartment or watch more sports...they don't know what to make of me....lol
  18. CowboyPrincess

    CowboyPrincess Priceless

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    Love your avitar jacs.... it's soooo you
  19. jamez25

    jamez25 Active Member

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    the perferct woman....
  20. jacs

    jacs I'd Hit It

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    [IMG]

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