Fun Ideas to Improve Jerry's Owners Box

[ArtClink]

1. Owners box challenge flag bazooka - NFL approved allowing Jerry to challenge calls from his perch
2. Add a new room adjacent to owners box for attorneys to sign NDA’s with _______
3. Call girl hotline - Looks like the 60s red Bat phone and gives Jerry quick access to his favorite hobby
4. Johnny Walker Blue hair piece flask with convenient drinking tube
5. Dallas Cowboys ball cap w built in hair piece (caution: it cannot be removed even for Jerry’s pseudo-patriotic gesture during national anthem)
6. AI goggles so Jerry can watch a simulated Cowboys win
7. A swear jar only payable when Jerry says “uh” or “candidly”
8. The little golden book of things Jerry thinks he learned from the great Jimmy Johnson
9. An in owners box psychologist to analyze why Jerry hates the Cowboys fans so much
10. Father of the year loving cup award

 

[Bobhaze]

11. A running clock showing how many years, months, weeks, days, hours and seconds since the last time the Cowboys won a divisional playoff game.
12. Multiple t-shirt cannons that fire canisters full of cash into the crowd each time the Cowboys score.
13. A miniature replica of his yacht in the owner’s special bathroom.
14. A life size wax figure of Stephen Jones giggling.
15. Free pairs of his wife’s designer “Gene Jones Jeans” shot from the t-shirt canons at the end of each quarter.
16. Jerry’s childhood coloring books hung up as part of the “art collection”.

 

[ArtClink]

11. A running clock showing how many years, months, weeks, days, hours and seconds since the last time the Cowboys won a divisional playoff game.
12. Multiple t-shirt cannons that fire canisters full of cash into the crowd each time the Cowboys score.
13. A miniature replica of his yacht in the owner’s special bathroom.
14. A life size wax figure of Stephen Jones giggling.
15. Free pairs of his wife’s designer “Gene Jones Jeans” shot from the t-shirt canons at the end of each quarter.
16. Jerry’s childhood coloring books hung up as part of the “art collection”.

Wow, I love #11!! How about an e billboard with that clock located near the stadium?

 

[Bobhaze]

Wow, I love #11!! How about an e billboard with that clock located near the stadium?

We need a wealthy benefactor to buy that billboard.

 

[ArtClink]

We need a wealthy benefactor to buy that billboard.

Indeed!

 

[ICP]

Fill it with clowns and a small car that Jerry and Stephen can watch the game in

 

[maryquality]

You guys crack me up!

 

[kskboys]

Stink bombs every 4 minutes.

 

[KingintheNorth]

I just wish the Owner's box had to face directly into the sun through that stupid opening in the stadium he refuses to close.