timb2
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This is my disaster satire draft of Jerry Jones. For us Cowboys Diehards we have lived with the pain as Jerry and his megalomania and incredibly horrible drafts from years past. Jerry unlike AL Davis who used Combine stats as a guide, Jerry has the most ridiculous reasoning for picks.
Just some of the Jerry rules
1- No Miami Hurricanes since Jimmy left ( except that 1 year they must have read my post on this). Jerry still hurts and anything conjuring Jimmy ,Jerry wants to avoid. Jerry holds bitter grudges and Miami gets the brunt. No Hurricanes.
2- Razorbacks can do nothing wrong. Jerry loves his Alma Mater and if he doesn't d4aft them,he will bring them in years later as free agents.
3- Jerry likes Nicknames and names that are hard to pronounce. You got a Stupid Nickname and Jerry must think that makes you good.
4- Jerry likes Frankensteins for O- Lineman. You can be timed by a sundial and as long as you are big Jerry is enamored with you. Jerry likes especially those guys who couldn't walk and chew bubble gum at the same time. Those clumsy goofy types.
5- Jerry doesn't mind Criminals,Pyschos,and Country Cooters. Jerry likes to team some street thug with some guy who looks like one of those hillbillies from the movie " Deliverance".. Just cannot take a normal person we have to draft the next Norman Bates.
6- Jerry drafts Edge Rushers and Tight Ends early. Jerry is year after year doing this.
7- Jerry will find some small school player No one ever heard of and make them a draft pick.
8- Jerry likes players named " Jones". I think Jerry fantasizes that's him making the play when he hears the name " Jones" by the announcer.
9- Jerry would trade top picks if he can get multiple 7th round picks. Jerry thinks he is a Riverboat Gambler and constantly trades down thinking he is doing good,not by getting lesser talented players.
10- Jerry will draft Homestate Texas players if Cowboys fans are hating the earlier draft picks. To appease the Wrath of fans. Jerry will draft a Texas player hoping fans will not want to harm him.
11- If Jerry has success with a pick ,he will double dip and go back to that college next year.
Just some of the Jerry rules
1- No Miami Hurricanes since Jimmy left ( except that 1 year they must have read my post on this). Jerry still hurts and anything conjuring Jimmy ,Jerry wants to avoid. Jerry holds bitter grudges and Miami gets the brunt. No Hurricanes.
2- Razorbacks can do nothing wrong. Jerry loves his Alma Mater and if he doesn't d4aft them,he will bring them in years later as free agents.
3- Jerry likes Nicknames and names that are hard to pronounce. You got a Stupid Nickname and Jerry must think that makes you good.
4- Jerry likes Frankensteins for O- Lineman. You can be timed by a sundial and as long as you are big Jerry is enamored with you. Jerry likes especially those guys who couldn't walk and chew bubble gum at the same time. Those clumsy goofy types.
5- Jerry doesn't mind Criminals,Pyschos,and Country Cooters. Jerry likes to team some street thug with some guy who looks like one of those hillbillies from the movie " Deliverance".. Just cannot take a normal person we have to draft the next Norman Bates.
6- Jerry drafts Edge Rushers and Tight Ends early. Jerry is year after year doing this.
7- Jerry will find some small school player No one ever heard of and make them a draft pick.
8- Jerry likes players named " Jones". I think Jerry fantasizes that's him making the play when he hears the name " Jones" by the announcer.
9- Jerry would trade top picks if he can get multiple 7th round picks. Jerry thinks he is a Riverboat Gambler and constantly trades down thinking he is doing good,not by getting lesser talented players.
10- Jerry will draft Homestate Texas players if Cowboys fans are hating the earlier draft picks. To appease the Wrath of fans. Jerry will draft a Texas player hoping fans will not want to harm him.
11- If Jerry has success with a pick ,he will double dip and go back to that college next year.
