Why American Kids Are Brats.

[ScipioCowboy]

Approach the article with an open mind. It makes some decent points.

http://ideas.time.com/2012/02/10/why-american-kids-are-brats/

 

[VietCowboy]

I've already mentioned this, but I guess it bears repeating. The biggest difference is the popularity of strollers and carrying your baby around in a seat. If you look at parenting across other cultures, you see babies are often carried very close to their parents face. This actually encourages infants and toddlers very early on to notice social cues when their parents are speaking to others. This is very important for socialization, and if you are being carried at the knee in a seat or stroller, you (the baby) do not have that easy access. The only time you are getting that social interaction is when your parent or their friends/strangers, brothers, sisters, are directly interacting with YOU (the baby) and making faces, talking in baby talk, trying to make you react (good or bad). So, that can cultivate more of a selfish (in a social sense) attitude since most of your early social interactions are between others and yourself, not others with others (i.e. your parents and someone else).

 

[JohnnyHopkins]

The French have to emphasize those things to their kids because being subserviant and submissive are requirements for service in the French Military. (I kid, I kid!).

 

[ScipioCowboy]

The French have to emphasize those things to their kids because being subserviant and submissive are requirements for service in the French Military. (I kid, I kid!).

You, sir, are a true comedian.

 

[ScipioCowboy]

I've already mentioned this, but I guess it bears repeating. The biggest difference is the popularity of strollers and carrying your baby around in a seat. If you look at parenting across other cultures, you see babies are often carried very close to their parents face. This actually encourages infants and toddlers very early on to notice social cues when their parents are speaking to others. This is very important for socialization, and if you are being carried at the knee in a seat or stroller, you (the baby) do not have that easy access. The only time you are getting that social interaction is when your parent or their friends/strangers, brothers, sisters, are directly interacting with YOU (the baby) and making faces, talking in baby talk, trying to make you react (good or bad). So, that can cultivate more of a selfish (in a social sense) attitude since most of your early social interactions are between others and yourself, not others with others (i.e. your parents and someone else).

This sounds reasonable.

But I think the article also makes a good point about the approach American parents take to praising their children. It's one thing to be proud of and praise your kid. It's something else entirely to raise your child up at the expense of other children.

You can witness this very tactic in the first "Facebook Parenting" thread.

 

[Cajuncowboy]

This comes down to kids not being taught respect and being handed everything they want on a silver platter.

Years ago, I was taught that if I was sitting in a chair and there were no other seats in the room, if an adult came in. you didn't offer them the seat, you simply got up and sat on the floor. Not today, they will just sit there and ignore the adult.

I was taught to say yes sir and yes mam. Today you are lucky if you get a thank you from some.

I was taught the value of a dollar by earning things and not by just asking or begging for them. Today, there is no respect for even the dollar.

Somewhere along the way the parents lost their way in raising their kids. They think it's best to coddle them and pamper them and then when they get to the real world, they are dumbfounded and shocked.

 

[jnday]

I think kids just take after their parents . With each generation , people show less respect for others . I see many examples of this behaviour each day . I have never had much for this " Me Generation " thing .

 

[Bigdog]

I differ from what she said that the French our more polite than the Americans. I visited France and found them to be very rude to the Americans I was with. I was little taken back by this. I am not going to generalize and say that all French are rude because it would not be right.

With that being said, I think children in general have a sense of entitlement. This is because of the world we live in today with the techology that we have at our disposal (internet, cell phones, computers, etc.). Technology can be blessing and curse to a society and cultural. Also our American values that we instill on our children is different from the rest of the world. We few ourselves as independent, free enterprise thinkers that made thsi country what is today. One of the best book that I have read was called "Habits of the Heart" that discusses American values throughout history. The main part of the book was individualism vs. community. The French as whole have a different governmental structure than we do which would never be tolerated here because it is against our value system. I teach my daughters to be polite to others as well as be gracious in defeat and wins. Americans are competitve but I think we sometimes want to coddler our kids especially if they don't win a game or get first place. It is like Trent Dilfer said you are not going to win at everything. Kids need to learn that too.

 

[SaltwaterServr]

I say yes ma'am and yes sir to anyone, regardless of age. Until you prove otherwise, I was raised to respect you as a gentleman or gentlewoman in polite society. Once you cross a line though, i was raised that you aren't worth hog spit. somebody like roethlisboerger? He falls of the Earth tomorrow? I'd probably dance a little jig.

 

[CanadianCowboysFan]

I say yes ma'am and yes sir to anyone, regardless of age. Until you prove otherwise, I was raised to respect you as a gentleman or gentlewoman in polite society. Once you cross a line though, i was raised that you aren't worth hog spit. somebody like roethlisboerger? He falls of the Earth tomorrow? I'd probably dance a little jig.

do you call everyone Mr and Mrs too?

 

[CanadianCowboysFan]

This sounds reasonable.

But I think the article also makes a good point about the approach American parents take to praising their children. It's one thing to be proud of and praise your kid. It's something else entirely to raise your child up at the expense of other children.

You can witness this very tactic in the first "Facebook Parenting" thread.

well there is also the issue of parents being competitive. It shows we are better parents when yours can read earlier, be better player etc

At the same time, teaching them to say yes maam, yes sir, telling them never to disagree with an adult etc won't make them better children. If anything, I want mine to stand up for himself in school, if the teacher is wrong, tell him/her, not to take crap from other children.

Do I give him everything he wants, pretty much, but he's an only child, born to Mrs CCF and I when we had pretty much given up having our own natural child, and is pretty much a miracle baby so to speak. He's the only grandchild to his one remaining grandparent.

He is the centre of world now, he knows it etc

Strange thing is, he is pretty much only rude to us and his grandmother at times, not to anyone else.

 

[ScipioCowboy]

well there is also the issue of parents being competitive. It shows we are better parents when yours can read earlier, be better player etc

What if the child has a learning disability?

Are you innately superior as a parent simply because you were blessed with a child without disabilities?

 

[ABQCOWBOY]

I think it's the fact that Children today do not interact directly with people nearly as much. Facebook, text, tweet, whatever it might be. You can say anything you want and there are no direct repercussions. You don't have to have social skills because you are not interfacing directly. You start believing you are invincible and smarter then you really are. You are not forced to live in the real world. This is what I think it is. JMO

 

[CowboyMcCoy]

You, sir, are a true comedian.

Skippy, France? :laugh2:

 

[CowboyMcCoy]

What if the child has a learning disability?

Are you innately superior as a parent simply because you were blessed with a child without disabilities?

A legend in his own mind....

 

[Cajuncowboy]

well there is also the issue of parents being competitive. It shows we are better parents when yours can read earlier, be better player etc

Dumbest statement in the history of the internet.

Strange thing is, he is pretty much only rude to us and his grandmother at times, not to anyone else.

Wow! He's rude to you, your mom and grandmother. And he's only 8?

 

[CanadianCowboysFan]

What if the child has a learning disability?

Are you innately superior as a parent simply because you were blessed with a child without disabilities?

that seems to be the way parents are judged this day or judge themselves.

your question is also unanswerable because one cannot answer it correctly, a) if you say yes, you are called elitist and mean, b) if you say no, then your original premise is said to be incorrect and you are stupid.

in any event, if you don't have children, just wait until you have them and they are in preschool when I swear some parents believe their tots can read Voltaire and understand pythaogorean (sp) theorem before they get to kindergarten. With the way the school system is, if your kid is behind, it is basically your fault for not working with them enough at home.

 

[CanadianCowboysFan]

Dumbest statement in the history of the internet.


Wow! He's rude to you, your mom and grandmother. And he's only 8?

you know a lot about such statements don't you.

you are obviously too dumb to understand the point that parents see themselves as successes if their children are better than other's.

We teach him to stand up for himself, he's a typical upper middle class kid, will correct you if you are wrong, won't just agree with you because you are older. It really is a good thing to be, critical, not blindly accepting etc

 

[CanadianCowboysFan]

A legend in his own mind....

nah, too easy, I will bite my tongue for once

 

[Cajuncowboy]

you know a lot about such statements don't you.

Yeah, because I don't have you on ignore. Yet.

you are obviously too dumb to understand the point that parents see themselves as successes if their children are better than other's.

You are one warped person if you think this. Just because your kid can hit a baseball better than some other kid you re a better parent? But this does speak volumes as to the kind of person you are. Again, your statement is the dumbest thing on the internet.

We teach him to stand up for himself, he's a typical upper middle class kid, will correct you if you are wrong, won't just agree with you because you are older. It really is a good thing to be, critical, not blindly accepting etc

My kids are "Upper Middle Class" and depending on your terminology, maybe more so. But they have been taught to respect their elders and if there is some correcting to be done, they brought it to us. There is a way to be respectful and still a critical thinker.