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It's actually a good read around the middle. Admittedly, the rest is fluff.
Romo needs to drop the Romeo act
Updated: December 19, 2007, 4:47 PM EST 1729 comments
You lay off that pet shop dame. Women weaken legs.
No, Jessica Simpson will never be mistaken for a shut-in stuck cleaning waste from the bottom of a dog cage. She has never looked, acted or dressed the way Adrian did when Mickey Goldmill, trainer, was telling Rocky Balboa, boxer, that chastity was the surest ticket to the heavyweight crown.
But since this has become a Philadelphia story, this Tony Romo habit of bringing his girlfriend to the Eagles game and then playing like, well, an undrafted quarterback out of Eastern Illinois, a warning lifted from the Rocky script feels like a necessary addition to the Cowboys' playbook.
Romo invited Carrie Underwood to the Eagles' game last year and posted a 45.5 quarterback rating. Romo invited Simpson to the Eagles game this year and made that 45.5 a five-touchdown day at the Super Bowl in comparison.
Hey, it's good to see Romo enjoying his apparent sex appeal more than any quarterback since Joe Namath. When it comes to scoring points Monday through Saturday, the guy makes Tom Brady look like a hopeless amateur.
But for the good of the team, shouldn't Romo start channeling the monogamous spirit of the revered family man, Roger Staubach?
"I enjoy sex as much as Joe Namath," Staubach once told Phyllis George. "Only I do it with one girl."
There's a lot at stake here, you see. The Patriots are 14-0. They haven't quite been the same juggernaut of late, but expect that to change when they hit the playoffs. Brady and Bill Belichick will get it rolling again on muscle memory.
New England should end up in the Arizona desert with an 18-0 record, a chance to secure its legacy as the greatest NFL team of all time, and an opportunity to punctuate its historic achievement with a blowout Super Bowl XLII victory over the representative from the inferior NFC.
Tony Romo is the one and only man who can stop all that from happening. Despite the Patriots' 48-27 triumph over the Cowboys in October, Romo remains the star Brady and Belichick fear most.
Nobody's going into Foxborough in the postseason and beating the Patriots, not even Peyton Manning. But at a neutral site, the mission isn't impossible.
The right opponent at the right time could conceivably make the Patriots the most devastated 18-1 team in the history of sports.
On the NFC side, Brett Favre would amount to the best story. He is the old gunslinger going out in a blaze of glory, and America can't get enough of that.
Chances are, Favre would turn to dust against the Patriots the way he did against the Cowboys. He's earned every glowing tribute written about his durability and go-for-broke style, but New England's defense would likely make him appear just as old as his birth certificate says he is (38).
Romo is an entirely different proposition. He is 27, at the height of his physical powers. He has the It factor in overdrive, and his ability to see the field and create something out of nothing with his legs makes him a potentially lethal threat to a dynasty's best laid plans.
Romo is an improvisational genius. If you didn't know it after eight games this season, you knew it after the ninth.
On his first of four touchdown passes against the Giants in Jersey, Romo dropped back, scrambled up the middle, lowered his head and tucked the ball into his belly as if preparing for a collision, and -- at the last possible millisecond -- shot up his head like a carnival Whac-a-mole and threw across his body to Tony Curtis in the end zone.
Hard to believe Romo was signed out of college for a lousy 10 grand, or $53,990,000 less than the deal ultimately given Eli Manning. Romo has arm strength, foot speed, and a radiant can-do aura that serves a quarterback as much as a reliable offensive line.
Last year's season-crushing fumble on a field-goal attempt did nothing to temper his swagger. In fact, Romo carries himself as a two-time Super Bowl champ, and not as a quarterback still looking for his first playoff win.
Maybe that's what attracts women to Romo like moths to a flame.
Underwood. Simpson. Sophia Bush. Britney Spears. Nothing can knock that I-know-something-you-don't smile off his face, so the conga line of actresses and pop icons keeps circling his locker.
Which brings us back to the stakes. As much as the NFL loves it when Jessica Simpson shows up on TV mouthing Romo's name and tugging her pink No. 9 jersey, the league needs Romo to keep his legs strong and sure.
They were wobbly and weak in losing to the Eagles. Romo missed on 23 of 36 passes, threw three interceptions, fumbled twice and was sacked four times. He left the field with an injured thumb and a 22.2 quarterback rating to boot.
The Cowboys fell to 12-2, and Jessica became the easy cheerleading target, the pom-pom girl to blame. But the attention had to be good for her career even if it wasn't so good for Tony's.
Romo went from a touchdown and two interceptions in the Carrie Underwood Eagles loss to no touchdowns and three interceptions in the Simpson Eagles loss. It's not likely Romo will be inviting Jessica Alba to next year's Philly game, we think.
And it's highly unlikely there will be a Cowboys-Eagles playoff game in Dallas for Simpson to haunt next month. But in the meantime, Romo is living a little dangerously as the American Idol on America's Team.
He's got everything going for him -- the fame, the fortune, the Pro Bowl selection and the knowledge that Staubach's grandson wears his No. 9 instead of grandpa's No. 12.
Romo deserves all of the above. He came from nowhere on a little serendipity and a lot of hard work.
He just needs to realize he's not the lead singer in a boy band, or the lead character in HBO's Entourage. Romo is the quarterback of the one NFC team that might be capable of beating the Patriots in Super Bowl XLII.
He could use a Burgess Meredith in his corner about now, telling him to find a nice pet store dame and settle down.
Romo needs to drop the Romeo act
Updated: December 19, 2007, 4:47 PM EST 1729 comments
You lay off that pet shop dame. Women weaken legs.
No, Jessica Simpson will never be mistaken for a shut-in stuck cleaning waste from the bottom of a dog cage. She has never looked, acted or dressed the way Adrian did when Mickey Goldmill, trainer, was telling Rocky Balboa, boxer, that chastity was the surest ticket to the heavyweight crown.
But since this has become a Philadelphia story, this Tony Romo habit of bringing his girlfriend to the Eagles game and then playing like, well, an undrafted quarterback out of Eastern Illinois, a warning lifted from the Rocky script feels like a necessary addition to the Cowboys' playbook.
Romo invited Carrie Underwood to the Eagles' game last year and posted a 45.5 quarterback rating. Romo invited Simpson to the Eagles game this year and made that 45.5 a five-touchdown day at the Super Bowl in comparison.
Hey, it's good to see Romo enjoying his apparent sex appeal more than any quarterback since Joe Namath. When it comes to scoring points Monday through Saturday, the guy makes Tom Brady look like a hopeless amateur.
But for the good of the team, shouldn't Romo start channeling the monogamous spirit of the revered family man, Roger Staubach?
"I enjoy sex as much as Joe Namath," Staubach once told Phyllis George. "Only I do it with one girl."
There's a lot at stake here, you see. The Patriots are 14-0. They haven't quite been the same juggernaut of late, but expect that to change when they hit the playoffs. Brady and Bill Belichick will get it rolling again on muscle memory.
New England should end up in the Arizona desert with an 18-0 record, a chance to secure its legacy as the greatest NFL team of all time, and an opportunity to punctuate its historic achievement with a blowout Super Bowl XLII victory over the representative from the inferior NFC.
Tony Romo is the one and only man who can stop all that from happening. Despite the Patriots' 48-27 triumph over the Cowboys in October, Romo remains the star Brady and Belichick fear most.
Nobody's going into Foxborough in the postseason and beating the Patriots, not even Peyton Manning. But at a neutral site, the mission isn't impossible.
The right opponent at the right time could conceivably make the Patriots the most devastated 18-1 team in the history of sports.
On the NFC side, Brett Favre would amount to the best story. He is the old gunslinger going out in a blaze of glory, and America can't get enough of that.
Chances are, Favre would turn to dust against the Patriots the way he did against the Cowboys. He's earned every glowing tribute written about his durability and go-for-broke style, but New England's defense would likely make him appear just as old as his birth certificate says he is (38).
Romo is an entirely different proposition. He is 27, at the height of his physical powers. He has the It factor in overdrive, and his ability to see the field and create something out of nothing with his legs makes him a potentially lethal threat to a dynasty's best laid plans.
Romo is an improvisational genius. If you didn't know it after eight games this season, you knew it after the ninth.
On his first of four touchdown passes against the Giants in Jersey, Romo dropped back, scrambled up the middle, lowered his head and tucked the ball into his belly as if preparing for a collision, and -- at the last possible millisecond -- shot up his head like a carnival Whac-a-mole and threw across his body to Tony Curtis in the end zone.
Hard to believe Romo was signed out of college for a lousy 10 grand, or $53,990,000 less than the deal ultimately given Eli Manning. Romo has arm strength, foot speed, and a radiant can-do aura that serves a quarterback as much as a reliable offensive line.
Last year's season-crushing fumble on a field-goal attempt did nothing to temper his swagger. In fact, Romo carries himself as a two-time Super Bowl champ, and not as a quarterback still looking for his first playoff win.
Maybe that's what attracts women to Romo like moths to a flame.
Underwood. Simpson. Sophia Bush. Britney Spears. Nothing can knock that I-know-something-you-don't smile off his face, so the conga line of actresses and pop icons keeps circling his locker.
Which brings us back to the stakes. As much as the NFL loves it when Jessica Simpson shows up on TV mouthing Romo's name and tugging her pink No. 9 jersey, the league needs Romo to keep his legs strong and sure.
They were wobbly and weak in losing to the Eagles. Romo missed on 23 of 36 passes, threw three interceptions, fumbled twice and was sacked four times. He left the field with an injured thumb and a 22.2 quarterback rating to boot.
The Cowboys fell to 12-2, and Jessica became the easy cheerleading target, the pom-pom girl to blame. But the attention had to be good for her career even if it wasn't so good for Tony's.
Romo went from a touchdown and two interceptions in the Carrie Underwood Eagles loss to no touchdowns and three interceptions in the Simpson Eagles loss. It's not likely Romo will be inviting Jessica Alba to next year's Philly game, we think.
And it's highly unlikely there will be a Cowboys-Eagles playoff game in Dallas for Simpson to haunt next month. But in the meantime, Romo is living a little dangerously as the American Idol on America's Team.
He's got everything going for him -- the fame, the fortune, the Pro Bowl selection and the knowledge that Staubach's grandson wears his No. 9 instead of grandpa's No. 12.
Romo deserves all of the above. He came from nowhere on a little serendipity and a lot of hard work.
He just needs to realize he's not the lead singer in a boy band, or the lead character in HBO's Entourage. Romo is the quarterback of the one NFC team that might be capable of beating the Patriots in Super Bowl XLII.
He could use a Burgess Meredith in his corner about now, telling him to find a nice pet store dame and settle down.