Funniest One Liner Quotes by Cowboys

[TequilaCowboy]

I think I recall when Roger the Dodger was being compared to Broadway Joe on his squeaky clean image and Joe’s bachelor lifestyle, he said “ I enjoy sex as much as Joe Namath, only I do it with one girl.”

 

[Captain Late]

1967- Lee Roy Jordan on Timmy Brown from Philly getting a broken jaw-

"I broke up the pass and his Face was in the way"

1974 Thanksgiving Day George Allen-

"Who in the Hell is Clint Longley?"

1980 Charlie Waters on Harold Carmichael getting hurt in Week 16-

"We had to do something about his Streak and Dennis Thurman took care of it"

1995 Erik Williams on injuring John Jurkovic in the NFC Championship-

"He took a Rest Play and Paid for it "

1996 Erik Williams before Super Bowl 30 on Greg Lloyd calling him a dirty player and other remarks-

"The only reason he is talking is because he knows he won't be lining up against me "


There are so many more.......

 

[Reality]

"If we had picked Manziel, he'd guarantee our relevance for 10 years."

Jerry Jones

That basically confirmed Jerry's interest being more about relevance than winning Super Bowls.

 

[gimmesix]

Consider yourself sucked. - Bill Parcells

I like "Don't eat the cheese" and "Put away the anointing oil" better.

 

[MarcusRock]

"That's my teammate, that's my quarterback"

That and the accompanying video will never not be hilarious.

 

[Pass2Run]

If he's so good, why is he available? - Mickey Spagnola.

We dem hot Boyz

 

[Pass2Run]

It was a catch.

He's got moxie.

 

[Montanalo]

"I like to look at the fact that over the last 15 to 20 years, we're the sixth-winningest team in the NFL. I like that."

JJ

 

[stuckindc]

"If we had picked Manziel, he'd guarantee our relevance for 10 years."

Jerry Jones

So painful

 

[gtb1943]

"Coach Landry does not discriminate. He treats all of us like we are black."
Calvin Hill

 

[stuckindc]

“ Catch 22 and you still ain’t caught him yet”

Not funny but one of my favorites

 

[Techsass]

All time classic....please share your thoughts! Almost as good as Garrett Sucks!

PSYT is the secret code that let's you start mega threads. Garret Sucks isn't a secret.

 

[Bobhaze]

What do voluntary mean?

- Darren Hambrick

That ^^^ is one of of my favorites.

Here’s a recent sadly funny Jerry quote about loving contract negotiations: “Some of my greatest moments were in these negotiations,"

Just ask all the players that got paid top market price.

 

[FaSho]

Not funny, but always loved this one from Deion:

"Water covers two-thirds of the Earth. I cover the rest."

 

[DanTanna]

“She was better lookin’ when she was younger”

 

[GoCowboysGo]

How ‘bout them Cowboys?!?! - Jimmy