Get to know you

Discussion in 'Members Zone' started by GimmeTheBall!, Jun 16, 2020.

  1. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received



    So tell us your lives' points and we'll tell you the folly of crying.

    Holla!
    And brings me a dollah !
    This could be fun ....
     
    dallasdave and gp_cowpolk like this.
  2. gp_cowpolk

    gp_cowpolk Landry Hat

    5,718 Messages
    9,229 Likes Received
    I like hot buttered buns
     
  3. Xelda

    Xelda Well-Known Member

    3,999 Messages
    13,254 Likes Received
    ksk will have fun with that one. I like salads with no dressing.
     
  4. gp_cowpolk

    gp_cowpolk Landry Hat

    5,718 Messages
    9,229 Likes Received
    Do you know he use to be a school teacher? Makes ya wonder how many warped kids are running around out there now
     
    Runwildboys, Xelda, RGV_C_Los and 2 others like this.
  5. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    Duh, we all do!!!
     
    gp_cowpolk and dallasdave like this.
  6. dallasdave

    dallasdave Well-Known Member

    31,580 Messages
    84,217 Likes Received
    I like a hot buttered biscuits :lmao:
     
    Xelda, Ranching, chris1995 and 2 others like this.
  7. dallasdave

    dallasdave Well-Known Member

    31,580 Messages
    84,217 Likes Received
    I will drink to that :yourock:
     
    Xelda, Ranching, chris1995 and 2 others like this.
  8. dallasdave

    dallasdave Well-Known Member

    31,580 Messages
    84,217 Likes Received
    :omg::eek::omg::lmao::lmao2:lots
     
    Xelda, Ranching, chris1995 and 2 others like this.
  9. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    An EVIL teacher?
     
    gp_cowpolk and dallasdave like this.
  10. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    ease up on the likes, pastor. The MENSA mods are catching on.
     
    gp_cowpolk and dallasdave like this.
  11. dallasdave

    dallasdave Well-Known Member

    31,580 Messages
    84,217 Likes Received
    They have those here :omg::eek::omg:
     
    Xelda, Ranching, chris1995 and 2 others like this.
  12. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    NaĆ­ve American disciple, I could tell you stories not believable, yet, they are.
    Did the instructions help on the device? Is it comfortable? Does it make your hand sweat?
     
    gp_cowpolk likes this.
  13. gp_cowpolk

    gp_cowpolk Landry Hat

    5,718 Messages
    9,229 Likes Received
    Around age 10 my dad got me one of those little compound bow beginner
    kits. Of course, the first month I went around our land sticking arrows in
    anything that could get stuck by an arrow. Did you know that a 1955 40
    horse Farmall tractor tire will take 6 rounds before it goes down? Tough
    kritters
    That got boring, so being the 10 yr. old Dukes of Hazard fan that I was, I
    quickly advanced to taking strips of cut up T-shirt doused in chainsaw gas
    tied around the end and was sending flaming arrows all over the place. One
    summer afternoon, I was shooting flaming arrows into a large rotten oak
    stump in our backyard. I looked over under the carport and see a shiny
    brand new can of starting fluid (Ether). The light bulb went off in my head.
    I grabbed the can and set it on the stump. I thought that it would probably
    just spray out in a disappointing manner. Lets face it, to a 10 yr old
    mouth-breather like myself, (Ether), really doesn't "sound" flammable. So, I
    went back into the house and got a 1 pound can of Pyrodex (black powder for
    muzzle loader rifles).

    At this point, I set the can of ether on the stump and opened up the can of
    black powder. My intentions were to sprinkle a little bit around the
    (Ether) can but it all sorta dumped out on me. No biggie, a 1 lb. Pyrodex
    and 16 oz (Ether) should make a loud pop, kinda like a firecracker you know?
    You know what? Screw that I'm going back in the house for the other can.

    Yes, I got a second can of pyrodex and dumped it too. Now we're cookin'.

    I stepped back about 15 ft and lit the 2 stroke arrow. I drew the nock to
    my cheek and took aim. As I released I heard a clunk as the arrow launched
    from my bow. In a slow motion time frame, I turned to see my dad getting
    out of the truck...OH crap He just got home from work. So help me God it
    took 10 minutes for that arrow to go from my bow to the can. My dad was
    walking towards me in slow motion with a what the hek look in his eyes. I turned
    back towards my target just in time to see the arrow pierce the starting
    fluid can right at the bottom. Right through the main pile of Pyrodex and
    into the can.

    Oh Hek.

    When the shock wave hit it knocked me off my feet. I don't know if it was
    the actual compression wave that threw me back or just reflex jerk back from
    235 freaking decibels of sound. I caught a half a millisecond glimpse of
    the violence during the initial explosion and I will tell you there was
    dust, grass, and bugs all hovering 1 ft above the ground as far as I could
    see. It was like a little low to the ground layer of dust fog full of
    grasshoppers, spiders, and a worm or two.

    The daylight turned purple. Let me repeat this... THE FRICKING DAYLIGHT
    TURNED PURPLE.

    There was a big tgum tree out by the gate going into the pasture. Notice I
    said "was". That son-of-a-gun got up and ran off.

    So here I am, on the ground blown completely out of my shoes with my
    Thundercats T-Shirt shredded, my dad is on the other side of the carport
    having what I can only assume is a Vietnam flashback: ECHO BRAVO CHARLIE
    YOU'RE BRINGIN' EM IN TOO CLOSE!! CEASE FIRE. DAMNIT CEASE FIRE!!!!!

    His hat has blown off and is 30 ft behind him in the driveway. All windows
    on the north side of the house are blown out and there is a slow rolling
    mushroom cloud about 2000 ft. over our backyard. There is a Honda 185 3
    wheeler parked on the other side of the yard and the fenders are drooped
    down and are now touching the tires.

    I wish I knew what I said to my dad at this moment. I don't know - I know I
    said something. I couldn't hear. I couldn't hear inside my own head. I
    don't think he heard me either... not that it would really matter. I don't
    remember much from this point on. I said something, felt a sharp pain, and
    then woke up later. I felt a sharp pain, blacked out, woke later....repeat
    this process for an hour or so and you get the idea. I remember at one
    point my mom had to give me CPR. and Dad screaming "Bring him back to life
    so I can kill him again". Thanks Mom.

    One thing is for sure... I never had to mow around that stump again, Mom
    had been griping about that thing for years and dad never did anything
    about it. I stepped up to the plate and handled business.

    Dad sold his muzzle loader a week or so later. I still have some sort of
    bone growth abnormality, either from the blast or the beating, or both.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is, get your kids into archery. It's good
    discipline and will teach them skills they can use later on in life.
     
  14. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    Damn that's a good story!!!

    I guess the neighbors didn't want their kids hanging with you for a long time.

    I will call CPS to report your parents for having all those dangerous toxins but the evidence is probably gone.

    glad you survived.
    Damnit. I can't top that story.

    ... Maybe I can. It involves an almost brand-new 1970 Dodge Charger.
     
    dallasdave and gp_cowpolk like this.
  15. GimmeTheBall!

    GimmeTheBall! Junior College Transfer

    27,890 Messages
    10,519 Likes Received
    A series of bad decisions and a bad father.

    See, it was midafternoon. The old man walked out of the livinv room to take a nap.
    Seconds later he walked back into the room to say, "Don't Take the car."

    He meant his beloved 1970 Dodge Charger.

    " Yeah, yeah, right you are govnor, " I said in a surly voice.

    Then the mind, a terrible thing, seemingly told me. "The old man will sleep for 2 hours. In 1 1/2 hours you could pick up the curvy little thing 35 miles away and bring her into town for college classes next day. C'mon, chap. Be a good lad. Bring her to town in style in the Dodge instead of her dad dropping her off at the dorms in that awful pickup truck. Good lad you are, aren't you?"

    Well I listened to my borderline criminal brain and took the keys from the large stereo where the old man played Dean Martin and Arthur Askey songs and I crept out into the Texas flatlands to drive 35 miles to me girl's home.
    She was looking fine. Tight shorts. Halter top and she smelled better than the cosmetics counter at the Rexall drug store.
    We rode back in style. Yes sir I felt like Sean Connery with his Bond girl.
    And then I heard it.
    It was a slight tic-tic-tic sound.
    Maybe If I go faster, me brilliant mind told me. I revved that pony up to 80 mph and turned up the old man's 8-track tape of the Tijuana Brass.
    Me girl was impressed. I

    But the tic-tic-tic grew louder. And louder and louder!
    Soon the engine was sounding like steel crushing steel and iron boots being strewn about. The dashboard turned red and then dark!
    Smoke all over!
    Emergency lights. Me girl running from the car and the smoke!

    Me nimble mind had deserted me. OIL PRESSURE GAUGE? WHAT'S THAT! THE OLD MAN WAS LOW ON OIL!!!! HOW DARE HE ENDANGER ME, A HANDSOME BOY WITH GIRLS ON THE MIND!!??
    Me girl's dad was called from a nearby gas station.
    He looked at the smoking enbine.
    "When's the last time you put oil in this Purdy car," he asked with a Deliverance grin.

    At that moment I hated me dad for putting me in such a predicament. And I hated his dad for fathering a son who would endanger the good bloodline. A CAN OF OIL COSTS $.69 !!!! HOW DARE HE?

    I called me dad. Scolded him for ruining me afternoon and asked him to come pick up his dangerous heel on the highway. "Bring the pickup. bring chains," I said testily.

    I rode home in me girl's father's pickup. Dropped her off at the dorms. Dropped me off in the safety of me mum's house and laid low for 2 months.
    Months later me dad told me about how he replaced the burnt-out engine for $2,000.
    Knowing how to put a good spin on things, "I said, "Dear old dad, at least now you have a brand-new engine in the Charger! And now I CAN read an oil gauge!"

    He never forgave me.
    I didn't care. Kids are like that.
     
    dallasdave and gp_cowpolk like this.
  16. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

    23,218 Messages
    25,350 Likes Received
    Nah, wear something slinky!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
    dallasdave, Xelda and gp_cowpolk like this.

Share This Page