I think Amber Heard may have put a hex on me

Reverend Conehead

Well-Known Member
Messages
9,953
Reaction score
11,862
I've written before about how evil Amber Heard is and how she deserves to be executed by hydrogen bomb. Well, she must have come on this site and read some of this stuff because all of a sudden I'm hexed.

I got really into watching this show, Criminal Minds and was binging on it on Netflix. I was only in the first season when guess who invades my viewing? Amber Heard! So I do a search for a movie to steam and I find this cool looking film, Justice League, that I want to watch, and I pay the fee to watch, then guess who ends up being in it? Amber Heard! Then I started watching Youtube vids of late night talk shows, and guess who turns up as a guest? Amber Heard! This evil sorceress just won't leave me alone! It was very unsettling. So I go to take a nap, and guess whose face just keeps materializing in my brain? Amber Heard's! Then I had terrifying dreams of her chasing me, cackling in laughter.

I can't escape her. Wherever I turn, there's some stinking image of her or something to remind me of her. No wonder Johnny Depp was terrified. The woman is relentless. I'm thinking I might have to lure her into my time machine and then send her back in time to be burned as a witch. There can be no doubt she practices witchery. None of this could happen otherwise. I had to go and open my big fat mouth on her and Johnny's divorce, which really isn't my business, but I didn't approve of her evil. Does anyone have advice on protecting myself?
 

DallasEast

Cowboys 24/7/365
Staff member
Messages
62,490
Reaction score
64,386
CowboysZone ULTIMATE Fan
I got really into watching this show, Criminal Minds and was binging on it on Netflix. I was only in the first season when guess who invades my viewing? Amber Heard!
lol!

Did seeing her on the show seem familiar..?

Does this post (click here) give you deja vu?

It should. The few seconds were taken from Heard's appearance on Criminal Minds, minus the, you know, hydrogen bomb explosion I added just for you. :laugh:And without the lipstick smooch at the end too. :laugh:
 

Reverend Conehead

Well-Known Member
Messages
9,953
Reaction score
11,862
lol!

Did seeing her on the show seem familiar..?

Does this post (click here) give you deja vu?

It should. The few seconds were taken from Heard's appearance on Criminal Minds, minus the, you know, hydrogen bomb explosion I added just for you. :laugh:And without the lipstick smooch at the end too. :laugh:

Yeah, I'm pretty sure she saw your little H-bomb gif. Now she's mad at me and my life is in danger. Gee, thanks.
 

kskboys

Well-Known Member
Messages
48,395
Reaction score
51,203
I've written before about how evil Amber Heard is and how she deserves to be executed by hydrogen bomb. Well, she must have come on this site and read some of this stuff because all of a sudden I'm hexed.

I got really into watching this show, Criminal Minds and was binging on it on Netflix. I was only in the first season when guess who invades my viewing? Amber Heard! So I do a search for a movie to steam and I find this cool looking film, Justice League, that I want to watch, and I pay the fee to watch, then guess who ends up being in it? Amber Heard! Then I started watching Youtube vids of late night talk shows, and guess who turns up as a guest? Amber Heard! This evil sorceress just won't leave me alone! It was very unsettling. So I go to take a nap, and guess whose face just keeps materializing in my brain? Amber Heard's! Then I had terrifying dreams of her chasing me, cackling in laughter.

I can't escape her. Wherever I turn, there's some stinking image of her or something to remind me of her. No wonder Johnny Depp was terrified. The woman is relentless. I'm thinking I might have to lure her into my time machine and then send her back in time to be burned as a witch. There can be no doubt she practices witchery. None of this could happen otherwise. I had to go and open my big fat mouth on her and Johnny's divorce, which really isn't my business, but I didn't approve of her evil. Does anyone have advice on protecting myself?
Gawd this is so easy. Let her take advantage of you. Start picturing her nekkid. That's what I do anyway.
 

DallasEast

Cowboys 24/7/365
Staff member
Messages
62,490
Reaction score
64,386
CowboysZone ULTIMATE Fan
Some people on this board seem to think I'm nuts. I can't imagine why.
Bad DE: Maybe because you are obsessed with Amber Heard..?
Good DE: How rude! Apologize this instant!
Bad DE: I will not! He keeps posting about her.
Good DE: So what? You keep posting about comic book movie adaptations! Lame.
Bad DE: Lame??? How DARE you!
Good DE: See? How does it feel big guy?
Bad DE: I'll kill you!
Good DE: You don't have the stones.
Bad DE: Oh yeah?
*BANG!*

7TOb.gif
 

Xelda

Well-Known Member
Messages
5,365
Reaction score
18,240
Bad DE: Maybe because you are obsessed with Amber Heard..?
Good DE: How rude! Apologize this instant!
Bad DE: I will not! He keeps posting about her.
Good DE: So what? You keep posting about comic book movie adaptations! Lame.
Bad DE: Lame??? How DARE you!
Good DE: See? How does it feel big guy?
Bad DE: I'll kill you!
Good DE: You don't have the stones.
Bad DE: Oh yeah?
*BANG!*

7TOb.gif
I was worried about Reverend's situation until you posted this. Should we get Amber Heard to dress as a nurse and come see you?
 

Runwildboys

Confused about stuff
Messages
51,901
Reaction score
97,210
CowboysZone DIEHARD Fan
Bad DE: Maybe because you are obsessed with Amber Heard..?
Good DE: How rude! Apologize this instant!
Bad DE: I will not! He keeps posting about her.
Good DE: So what? You keep posting about comic book movie adaptations! Lame.
Bad DE: Lame??? How DARE you!
Good DE: See? How does it feel big guy?
Bad DE: I'll kill you!
Good DE: You don't have the stones.
Bad DE: Oh yeah?
*BANG!*

7TOb.gif
That's tellin' him!...................o_O
 
Top