-
Read the latest Dallas Cowboys News!Dallas Cowboys Newswire
Joke: Why, Why, Why?
- Thread starter WoodysGirl
- Start date
cowboyfan4life_mark
5 outta 8 ain't bad
- Messages
- 3,037
- Reaction score
- 125
Why is it that when you walk into a room and people are watching TV, and you ask, "What are you watching?", the reply is "Nothing".
Why is it that when at someones house for dinner and you clean your plate, they ask "Did you like it?"
Why is it that when at someones house for dinner and you clean your plate, they ask "Did you like it?"
jksmith269
Proud Navy Veteran 1990-1995
- Messages
- 3,939
- Reaction score
- 57
Since you mentioned this law specificly I looked it up and this law only deals with accesibility issues. Such as rails being in the way, Busses having the ability to transport wheelchairs, Ramps at buildings, so forth but nothing to do with the numbers being done in braille.Rowdy said:
Your first answer I would think is correct it's cheaper to make them all with Braille than it is to have to run two seperate printing lines....
DallasCowpoke111
Benched
- Messages
- 2,242
- Reaction score
- 0
jksmith269 said:
You might wanna go check this out. But be warned, have a LOT of time, and enjoy being bored! lol
http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/ada/pubs/ada.txt
Here's just an excerpt that pertains to this:
5 Super Bowls
Member
- Messages
- 415
- Reaction score
- 0
DallasCowpoke said:Worse..........
Actually she went on to UT to get her masters in political science or something like that. Some people have book smarts and some have common sense, I was lucky enough to be blessed with both.
Longboysfan
hipfake08
- Messages
- 13,298
- Reaction score
- 5,783
I miss ol' Billy. It doesn't matter what party you are,
this is absolutely hilarious. This comes from a black
comedian on a Canadian TV show:
"Yep, that's right - I miss Bill Clinton! He was the closest thing we
ever got to having a black man as President.
Number 1 - He played the sax.
Number 2 - He smoked weed.
Number 3 - He had his way with ugly white women.
Even now? Look at him... his wife works, and he don't!
And, he gets a check from the government every month.
Manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's
shelves
this week with "Clinton Soup," in honor of one of the nations' most
distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water.
Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill
Clinton.
The Dodge Drafter ... It will be built in Canada.
When asked what he thought about foreign affairs, Clinton replied,
"I don't know, I never had one."
American Indians nicknamed Bill Clinton "Walking Eagle" because he is
so full of crap he can't fly.
Clinton lacked only three things to become one of America's finest
leaders:
integrity, vision, wisdom.
The Clinton revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth
as I
know it, the whole truth, as I believe it to be, and nothing but what
I
think you need to know."
Clinton will be recorded in history as the only President to do Hanky
Panky
between Bushes.
this is absolutely hilarious. This comes from a black
comedian on a Canadian TV show:
"Yep, that's right - I miss Bill Clinton! He was the closest thing we
ever got to having a black man as President.
Number 1 - He played the sax.
Number 2 - He smoked weed.
Number 3 - He had his way with ugly white women.
Even now? Look at him... his wife works, and he don't!
And, he gets a check from the government every month.
Manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's
shelves
this week with "Clinton Soup," in honor of one of the nations' most
distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water.
Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill
Clinton.
The Dodge Drafter ... It will be built in Canada.
When asked what he thought about foreign affairs, Clinton replied,
"I don't know, I never had one."
American Indians nicknamed Bill Clinton "Walking Eagle" because he is
so full of crap he can't fly.
Clinton lacked only three things to become one of America's finest
leaders:
integrity, vision, wisdom.
The Clinton revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth
as I
know it, the whole truth, as I believe it to be, and nothing but what
I
think you need to know."
Clinton will be recorded in history as the only President to do Hanky
Panky
between Bushes.
Longboysfan
hipfake08
- Messages
- 13,298
- Reaction score
- 5,783
Remember They Vote
Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old
fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying:
"Free to good home. You want it, you take it". For three days the fridge
sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually
decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to
good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fr! idge for sale
$50". The next day someone stole it. Caution! . . . . . . . . . . . .
These people Vote
=======
While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent
which direction was North because, he explained, he didn't want the sun
waking him up every morning. She a! sked, "Does the sun rise in the North?"
When my brother explained t hat the sun rises in the East, (and has
for sometime), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with
that stuff". . . . . . . .She ALSO votes!
==========
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I
got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center
was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7
days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to
end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . . . . . . . .He ALSO votes!
==========
My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we
overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the
sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a
convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car
was moving". . . . . . . . She ALSO votes!
==========
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car It's designed to cut
through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk . . . . . .
My sister ALSO votes!
==========
My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was! a big party, we bought 2 cases. The
cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount . . . . . . .
He ALSO votes!
==========
I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring
attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the
chain rip out every time she turned he! r head?" I explained that a person's
nose and ear remain the same d istance apart no matter which way the
head is turned. . . . . . . . . . My friend ALSO votes!
=========
I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a
trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me,
"has your plane arrived yet? ".
. . . . . . . . SHE ALSO votes!
=========
While working at a Pizza Parlor I observed a man ordering a small
pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would
like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He though about it for some time before
responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry
enough to eat 6 . . . . . . . . . Yep, he votes too.
=========
Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old
fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying:
"Free to good home. You want it, you take it". For three days the fridge
sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually
decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to
good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fr! idge for sale
$50". The next day someone stole it. Caution! . . . . . . . . . . . .
These people Vote
=======
While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent
which direction was North because, he explained, he didn't want the sun
waking him up every morning. She a! sked, "Does the sun rise in the North?"
When my brother explained t hat the sun rises in the East, (and has
for sometime), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with
that stuff". . . . . . . .She ALSO votes!
==========
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I
got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center
was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7
days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to
end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . . . . . . . .He ALSO votes!
==========
My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we
overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the
sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a
convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car
was moving". . . . . . . . She ALSO votes!
==========
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car It's designed to cut
through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk . . . . . .
My sister ALSO votes!
==========
My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was! a big party, we bought 2 cases. The
cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount . . . . . . .
He ALSO votes!
==========
I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring
attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the
chain rip out every time she turned he! r head?" I explained that a person's
nose and ear remain the same d istance apart no matter which way the
head is turned. . . . . . . . . . My friend ALSO votes!
=========
I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a
trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me,
"has your plane arrived yet? ".
. . . . . . . . SHE ALSO votes!
=========
While working at a Pizza Parlor I observed a man ordering a small
pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would
like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He though about it for some time before
responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry
enough to eat 6 . . . . . . . . . Yep, he votes too.
=========
Reality
Staff member
- Messages
- 30,552
- Reaction score
- 69,626
These are some of my own ..
Why does the sign say "Right Lane Must Turn Right" instead of just "Right Lane Must Turn" since if there is a "right" lane, it means there are at least two lanes going the same direction and the right lane could not legally turn left?
Why does the U-turn sign look like an N? Why don't they call it an N-turn?
Why does the sign say "Speed Zone Ahead" when it really means that you must slow down ahead?
Why does the sign say "Railroad Crossing" instead of "Train Crossing" ?? They don't say "Deer Path Crossing" instead of "Deer Crossing" or "Bike Trail Crossing" instead of "Bike Crossing" ..
Why do they call highways North and South based on where they are located instead of which direction you are driving on them? You know how confusing it is to tell someone to drive north on 99 South without sounding like you're sending them on a suicide mission?
Some favorites from Gallagher ..
Why do they call it a "hot water heater" instead of just a "water heater" ?? If the water is hot, you don't need a heater.
Why do they call them apartments when they are all bunched together?
Why do they call our government congress instead of progress since the opposite of "con" is "pro" ??
Oh, and these are all rhetorical questions ...
Why does the sign say "Right Lane Must Turn Right" instead of just "Right Lane Must Turn" since if there is a "right" lane, it means there are at least two lanes going the same direction and the right lane could not legally turn left?
Why does the U-turn sign look like an N? Why don't they call it an N-turn?
Why does the sign say "Speed Zone Ahead" when it really means that you must slow down ahead?
Why does the sign say "Railroad Crossing" instead of "Train Crossing" ?? They don't say "Deer Path Crossing" instead of "Deer Crossing" or "Bike Trail Crossing" instead of "Bike Crossing" ..
Why do they call highways North and South based on where they are located instead of which direction you are driving on them? You know how confusing it is to tell someone to drive north on 99 South without sounding like you're sending them on a suicide mission?
Some favorites from Gallagher ..
Why do they call it a "hot water heater" instead of just a "water heater" ?? If the water is hot, you don't need a heater.
Why do they call them apartments when they are all bunched together?
Why do they call our government congress instead of progress since the opposite of "con" is "pro" ??
Oh, and these are all rhetorical questions ...
cowboyfan4life_mark
5 outta 8 ain't bad
- Messages
- 3,037
- Reaction score
- 125
Where do you live...Reality said:These are some of my own ..
Why does the sign say "Right Lane Must Turn Right" instead of just "Right Lane Must Turn" since if there is a "right" lane, it means there are at least two lanes going the same direction and the right lane could not legally turn left?
Why does the U-turn sign look like an N? Why don't they call it an N-turn?
Why does the sign say "Speed Zone Ahead" when it really means that you must slow down ahead?
Why does the sign say "Railroad Crossing" instead of "Train Crossing" ?? They don't say "Deer Path Crossing" instead of "Deer Crossing" or "Bike Trail Crossing" instead of "Bike Crossing" ..
Why do they call highways North and South based on where they are located instead of which direction you are driving on them? You know how confusing it is to tell someone to drive north on 99 South without sounding like you're sending them on a suicide mission?
Some favorites from Gallagher ..
Why do they call it a "hot water heater" instead of just a "water heater" ?? If the water is hot, you don't need a heater.
Why do they call them apartments when they are all bunched together?
Why do they call our government congress instead of progress since the opposite of "con" is "pro" ??
Oh, and these are all rhetorical questions ...
StanleySpadowski
Active Member
- Messages
- 4,815
- Reaction score
- 0
If your car could go faster than the speed of light and you put the headlights on would you see yourself in the mirror when you hit the brakes?
Since you only see "Pass with care" signs at certain spots on the highway can you "pass with reckless abandon" everywhere else?
Why were bands like Black Sabbath, AC/DC and Led Zeppelin taboo for radio airplay in my youth yet are now main staples of classic rock stations?
Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?
Why is cable/sattelite tv the only product I can think of that I can't buy on an ala carte basis?
Why can't they put the gas cap on the same side of every car they make. The steering wheel's on the same side of every one in this country, why do I always have to poke and hope when driving a strange automobile.
Since you only see "Pass with care" signs at certain spots on the highway can you "pass with reckless abandon" everywhere else?
Why were bands like Black Sabbath, AC/DC and Led Zeppelin taboo for radio airplay in my youth yet are now main staples of classic rock stations?
Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?
Why is cable/sattelite tv the only product I can think of that I can't buy on an ala carte basis?
Why can't they put the gas cap on the same side of every car they make. The steering wheel's on the same side of every one in this country, why do I always have to poke and hope when driving a strange automobile.