Long rambling rant (?) on the boys

[burmafrd]

One of my few days off with nothing to do early in the morning so I am going to take some time and pretty much sound off on everything boys.



Wade. Like the guy but do not believe he is going to get us a ring. Sadly right now I have to put Switzer up there as a better coach. And not just because he was filling the spot when the boys won one. He does not seem to get the need to push hard on a team - which is what you need to do to when rings. He seems satisfied at too low a level. As for alternatives I do not see any available nor do I see Jerruh willing to make a change mid season so we are stuck with him. Less said about the D the better.

Garrett. Inconsistent. He has masterful game plans and ones that suck. Maybe that is to be expected from a young coach but there it is. he also seems able to adjust mid games sometimes and others not at all. I certainlyh do not see signs that he is ready to be a HC.

Since everyone knows Wade is the head honcho on D I have to give Stewart a pass since we do not know if he could do better if given the authority.


Jerruh. Best owner in the game, but sometimes he sucks as a GM. And mostly because he interferes too much in the day to day stuff. Probably a reason we have not had many tough independent HCs, which I happen to think you need to win multiple rings.

Postition coaches: Has Houck lost it? Its a valid question. Maybe BP knew what he was doing when he let him go from Miami. Maybe Sparano was better then we thought as a OL coach. Campo has not shown much in the secondary- but once again how much of that is wade?
Read needs to be shot, drawn and quartered, hung, then burned at the stake and the ground consecrated with holy water. No more needs to be said.
The rest of the position coaches have not exactly impressed me either.

Romo. forget Brady and be yourself- you have not gotten better at playing QB since you tried to copy him. And I do not care how many big plays you make- YOU HAVE TO CUT DOWN ON THE TURNOVERS.

Brad: might have a chance to show you are not washed up-good luck.

TO: come on guy you have done so well do not start to backslide.

Roy WR. Welcome to a winning team and bust your butt.

MB3. Stop jinking and do what you do best- hit people.
Felix- come back soon.
Tashard- your chance is NOW.
Cricket- stop living off of eating a bug and get with it.

O line: shape up your fat behinds and get with it. ANdre- work on those snaps- by now you know it will never be easy for you so you will have to work on it for good. Flo- effort guy, even when it hurts. Bigg- just keep on trucking. Colombo- maintain your concentration guy- you are better then a lot of people believ e and if you want that big contract this year you have to prove it now. Kosier- I was one of many who did not truly appreciate you.
The backups- SHOW SOMETHING DAMN IT!!

Witten: ALL PRO PLAYING LIKE ONE.
Bennet: grow up.
Curtis: to move up takes CONSISTENT EFFORT.

WRs: Crayton shut your mouth and play. Miles- to prove yourself requires constant repetition. Hurd- good luck kid. Stanback: either heal up or hit the door.

McBriar: see ya next year.
New guy- good luck.

Folk: keep it up dude.

STs: You really do not want me to get into details, do you?

Secondary: Its not a football sin to cover guys tight- HONEST.
And its also not a sin to tackle well.

LBs: Where have you gone Greg Ellis- lonely Cowboys eyes turn to you?
Zack- keep it up and keep on trucking.
Bradie- less talk and more tackles.
Ware- I hesitate to ask for more but we need more. Not reasonable I know but there we are.
Spencer- show WHY we made you a first rd pick.
Carp= sadly I have pretty much given up on you.
Burnett- less typing on your blog and more playing would be appreciated.

Canty- backsliding guy. I expected more out of you.
Spears- I did not expect more out of you.
Tank- ditto Canty.
Hatcher- MIA
Rat- pretty much all anyone could ask and I will not ask for more.

And there it is.

 

[Rampage]

:bravo: I agree with everything.

 

[AKATheRake]

Absolutely perfect! 110/100 in my books! Now get this over to Wade and the team. Just a master piece reflection on this team.

 

[WG5516]

Yes someone email this to Jerruh so he can get 'er done!

 

[burmafrd]

One more thing: who does our game time assessments of injuries? Whoever it is - CAN THEM RIGHT NOW. Seems like they have been WRONG 90% of the time. I love our trainors- but the medical staff and doctors look like they graduated from a hack diploma mill.

 

[MONT17]

Don't forget the Trainers who can't get our guys back from pulled muscles. And those scouts who said no WR in the draft can help us this year! We need Ware to turn into Charles Haley for a few weeks!

 

[Brian_C82]

I could be wrong, but it seems like we have a bunch of players who are not in peak shape to play football. This would explain the inordinate number of injuries that are taking place. Parcells may have been an idiot, but he did put a big emphasis on player conditioning. We had almost no injuries in 2006.

 

[Achozen]

What have you seen/heard from Bennett that says he's still immature?

 

[Tusan_Homichi]

Pretty much agreed on all points. One little caveat though, I think Bennett would be looked at a lot more favorably around here if he catches that ball against the Cardinals and scores.

 

[THUMPER]

Pretty much agreed on all points. One little caveat though, I think Bennett would be looked at a lot more favorably around here if he catches that ball against the Cardinals and scores.

That was supposed to be his strength, catching the ball. He supposedly has great hands but I have yet to see them in a game. Against the Cards he took his eye off the ball to look for the goalline and dropped an easy TD. Lack of concentration and concerned too much with impressing the coaches and getting on SportsCenter.

Maybe it's just freshman jitters but he needs to get over them now and start making plays every time he has the chance.

Fasano, meanwhile is having a very good season in Miami and makes me wonder again why we gave him up for next to nothing and drafted Bennett. Bennett doesn't appear to be an upgrade in any way over Fasano at this point and that draft pick could have been better used for another position.

 

[burmafrd]

To be fair Fasano is starting in Miami so he will be getting a whole lot more work then he ever would here. Any TE that plays here named other then Witten is always going to be getting limited oppurtunities. Which means that he MUST make the most of EVERY ONE. That is why I said grow up; if he has not figured all this out by now then he is stupid.

 

[CrazyCowboy]

:bravo: I agree with everything.

Your so nice--

 

[justbob]

Well written ----well said --that a boyyyy Get up early more often

 

[zeromaster]

Did the OP ever explain how Switzer was superior? I'm not exactly satisfied with Wade's approach (as regards team toughness) so far, but what did Switzer actually do beyond "driving the bus"?

 

[burmafrd]

He won a ring while filling the seat. Untill Wade does the same Switzer has to be considered better due to results.

 

[TEUFELI]

I like. Think the best advice you gave was to Romo.

 

[jazzcat22]

That was supposed to be his strength, catching the ball. He supposedly has great hands but I have yet to see them in a game. Against the Cards he took his eye off the ball to look for the goalline and dropped an easy TD. Lack of concentration and concerned too much with impressing the coaches and getting on SportsCenter.

Maybe it's just freshman jitters but he needs to get over them now and start making plays every time he has the chance.

Fasano, meanwhile is having a very good season in Miami and makes me wonder again why we gave him up for next to nothing and drafted Bennett. Bennett doesn't appear to be an upgrade in any way over Fasano at this point and that draft pick could have been better used for another position.

Crayton is supposed to have great hands...yet he dropped a ball that could have sent us to the NFC Championship game last year....how many balls has TO dropped?. Yet Bennett in his 1st year drops a pass and everyone is jumping on him? There were many other plays that cost us that game.

 

[burmafrd]

Guys who have done it before get some slack. Rookies get none. And should not get any untill they have made some big plays in big games.

 

[Rack]

One more thing: who does our game time assessments of injuries? Whoever it is - CAN THEM RIGHT NOW. Seems like they have been WRONG 90% of the time. I love our trainors- but the medical staff and doctors look like they graduated from a hack diploma mill.

All of the sudden Parcells' rule of "You don't practice, you don't play" doesn't sound so bad, does it?

I always liked that rule. Wish Wade would implement it.

 

[cowboyed]

Parodying for the heck of it...Nothing personal.

One of my few days off with nothing to do early in the morning so I am going to take some time and pretty much sound off on everything boys. I am anticipating keyboarding artistry at its finest.



Wade. Like the guy but do not believe he is going to get us a ring. Sadly right now I have to put Switzer up there as a better coach. And not just because he was filling the spot when the boys won one. He does not seem to get the need to push hard on a team - which is what you need to do to when rings. He seems satisfied at too low a level. As for alternatives I do not see any available nor do I see Jerruh willing to make a change mid season so we are stuck with him. Less said about the D the better. What a bitter ex-lover you are...

Garrett. Inconsistent. He has masterful game plans and ones that suck. Maybe that is to be expected from a young coach but there it is. he also seems able to adjust mid games sometimes and others not at all. I certainlyh do not see signs that he is ready to be a HC. Admit it you've had it up to here with redheads.

Since everyone knows Wade is the head honcho on D I have to give Stewart a pass since we do not know if he could do better if given the authority. Quite big-hearted of you, Stewie's eyes are welling in appreciation.


Jerruh. Best owner in the game, but sometimes he sucks as a GM. And mostly because he interferes too much in the day to day stuff. Probably a reason we have not had many tough independent HCs, which I happen to think you need to win multiple rings. Skip Bayless has nothing on you.


Postition coaches: Has Houck lost it? Its a valid question. Maybe BP knew what he was doing when he let him go from Miami. Maybe Sparano was better then we thought as a OL coach. Maybe if frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their heines when they hop.

Campo has not shown much in the secondary- but once again how much of that is wade? That's quite unfair considering Campo due to his size and bushy hair is also spending valuable time being an elephant tampon.


Read needs to be shot, drawn and quartered, hung, then burned at the stake and the ground consecrated with holy water. No more needs to be said.
The rest of the position coaches have not exactly impressed me either. Why not hot wire Read's testicles and zap him with 400 volts while you are at it.


Romo. forget Brady and be yourself- you have not gotten better at playing QB since you tried to copy him. Xerox is working with me on developing a more capable machine so that I can copy Brady, 2 sidedly no less. And I do not care how many big plays you make- YOU HAVE TO CUT DOWN ON THE TURNOVERS. And you have to cut down on cheeseburgers fatboy...

Brad: might have a chance to show you are not washed up-good luck. Thanks for the moral support, I need to go pinch a loaf now.

TO: come on guy you have done so well do not start to backslide. Ok sweet meat, for you I will do the polka in the end zone.

Roy WR. Welcome to a winning team and bust your butt. Sorry but I have never been in prison and I am not going to endure this kind of hazing.

MB3. Stop jinking and do what you do best- hit people. Yeah, I am also going to kick em in the smallberries and gouge their eyes out while I am at it.

Felix- come back soon. Shane come back, please come back. Shhaaaannnne. You fans kill me.....

Tashard- your chance is NOW. Thank you Capt. Obvious. I am going to let Garrett and Wade know you are available for motivational speech writing.

Cricket- stop living off of eating a bug and get with it. Hee, hee, chortle, guffaw - not!

O line: shape up your fat behinds and get with it. ANdre- work on those snaps- by now you know it will never be easy for you so you will have to work on it for good. Flo- effort guy, even when it hurts. Bigg- just keep on trucking. Colombo- maintain your concentration guy- you are better then a lot of people believ e and if you want that big contract this year you have to prove it now. Kosier- I was one of many who did not truly appreciate you.
The backups- SHOW SOMETHING DAMN IT!! We thank you oh mighty fan for the best pep talk we ever heard. Did you head coach the Warsaw Perogies.



Witten: ALL PRO PLAYING LIKE ONE. Holy inspiration, batman...
Bennet: grow up. I think I have reached my height limit at this juncture.
Curtis: to move up takes CONSISTENT EFFORT. The same thing apparently applies to you shutting up.

WRs: Crayton shut your mouth and play. You want me to pass out! Miles- to prove yourself requires constant repetition. I prove myself, I prove myself, I prove myself... Hurd- good luck kid. Yeah, happy lucky healing no doubt. Stanback: either heal up or hit the door. If I hit the door I will reinjure himself.

McBriar: see ya next year. Bloody well right my little wallabe.
New guy- good luck. Oongoua, Tarzan.

Folk: keep it up dude. No need to get into my private(s) life.

STs: You really do not want me to get into details, do you? No thank you, we'd rather have prostate surgery!

Secondary: Its not a football sin to cover guys tight- HONEST. Huh, we are agnostic.
And its also not a sin to tackle well. Are you referring to a venial or mortal sin?

LBs: Where have you gone Greg Ellis- lonely Cowboys eyes turn to you? Hallowed darkness my old friend, I have come to tackle you again.

Zack- keep it up and keep on trucking. The high cost of fuel is keeping me off the road, chump.

Bradie- less talk and more tackles. Get off my case, I am practicing to put a lick on Dr. Phil.

Ware- I hesitate to ask for more but we need more. Not reasonable I know but there we are. My foot is up your arse, I find that very reasonable do you need to know more?

Spencer- show WHY we made you a first rd pick. Shut your trap, I am expecting to win gold in the wheelchair Olympics.

Carp= sadly I have pretty much given up on you. I'll do my best to get over it, and by the way do you know anyone that repairs bongs.

Burnett- less typing on your blog and more playing would be appreciated. No need to despair. I just sprained my fore and middlefingers of each hand while typing.

Canty- backsliding guy. I expected more out of you. Why don't you backslide down a barbed wire fence.

Spears- I did not expect more out of you. Fooled you, cigarette peepee.

Tank- ditto Canty. Is this Indonesian urban street talk?

Hatcher- MIA Cool dude, the 'Mango Pickle Down River' and 'Bamboo Banga' tunes just light me up.

Rat- pretty much all anyone could ask and I will not ask for more. I am fulfilled now after digesting your acknowledgment. Excuse me, I have an urgent need to violently fart.

And there it is.

That's the way the story goes...