Reverend Conehead
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It's 20 years ago, you're an adult, and you marry the women of your dreams. Let's call her Sheila. She's beautiful, kind, and shares your values. You believe you've hit the jackpot for relationships. She says she has no family because her entire family, except for her, was killed in a tornado some years back. But she appears to have moved on just fine, and is a great person whom you love to be with. You build a good life, and have a couple of kids, a son and a daughter.
Then, after 5 years, Sheila seems a little off. She's still a terrific person, but she is prone to forgetting certain things, and is a little more introverted than before. But she seems to shake it off, and things continue just fine. You continue with your life together, and things are fine. You're in a good career, earning good money, and she chooses to be a homemaker until the kids are grown. You're both good with the arrangement. You and she, and the kids, visit your family from time to time, and they love her. You never visit her family, because, remember, they were killed in that awful tornado.
So 20 years later, the kids are off in college or trade school, and you and Sheila are at a seedy party, of the type that you normally would never go to. She gets drunk, and then someone hands her some pink pills, which she ingests. It's a type of drug that makes people prone to just spill their guts, telling truths they normally would keep to themselves. And she spills her guts to you. Turns out, her name isn't Sheila at all. Her name is Loretta. She has an identical twin sister named Sheila whom you married 20 years ago. At the 5 year mark of your marriage, Loretta says, Sheila had buyer's remorse about the marriage and wanted out, but didn't want to hurt you or suffer herself via divorce. Thus, Loretta, who had wanted a financially stable husband, agreed to take over for her as your wife.
It's why at the 5-year mark, your “wife” had trouble remembering things about your courtship and about your likes and dislikes. It was actually Loretta newly together with you, getting adjusted to you. In reality, you married Sheila and you were with her for five years, and had your two kids with her. Then, unknown to you, you switched to Loretta, and have been with her for the past 15 years.
You have no complaints about Loretta. Except for her hiding that one huge truth, she's been an excellent wife. She's attractive, kind, and is a good cook. She's been a great mom, or step-mom, to your kids. What do you do?
1. Insist that you married Sheila, and you want her back, so you tell Loretta to get lost, and you go on a search for Sheila.
2. Other than the switcheroo, Loretta has been a good wife, and you've been with her longer than you were with Sheila. Therefore, you just stick with her.
3. You don't like being fooled, and so you choose to be with neither Sheila nor Loretta. You find a divorce lawyer who can help you to divorce Sheila even though she's not present, and argue that Loretta has no parental rights due to her fraud.
4. Other. Explain.
Note: Straight man version is above. If you're something other than a straight man, just switch the gender and/or orientations as needed to match your life.
Then, after 5 years, Sheila seems a little off. She's still a terrific person, but she is prone to forgetting certain things, and is a little more introverted than before. But she seems to shake it off, and things continue just fine. You continue with your life together, and things are fine. You're in a good career, earning good money, and she chooses to be a homemaker until the kids are grown. You're both good with the arrangement. You and she, and the kids, visit your family from time to time, and they love her. You never visit her family, because, remember, they were killed in that awful tornado.
So 20 years later, the kids are off in college or trade school, and you and Sheila are at a seedy party, of the type that you normally would never go to. She gets drunk, and then someone hands her some pink pills, which she ingests. It's a type of drug that makes people prone to just spill their guts, telling truths they normally would keep to themselves. And she spills her guts to you. Turns out, her name isn't Sheila at all. Her name is Loretta. She has an identical twin sister named Sheila whom you married 20 years ago. At the 5 year mark of your marriage, Loretta says, Sheila had buyer's remorse about the marriage and wanted out, but didn't want to hurt you or suffer herself via divorce. Thus, Loretta, who had wanted a financially stable husband, agreed to take over for her as your wife.
It's why at the 5-year mark, your “wife” had trouble remembering things about your courtship and about your likes and dislikes. It was actually Loretta newly together with you, getting adjusted to you. In reality, you married Sheila and you were with her for five years, and had your two kids with her. Then, unknown to you, you switched to Loretta, and have been with her for the past 15 years.
You have no complaints about Loretta. Except for her hiding that one huge truth, she's been an excellent wife. She's attractive, kind, and is a good cook. She's been a great mom, or step-mom, to your kids. What do you do?
1. Insist that you married Sheila, and you want her back, so you tell Loretta to get lost, and you go on a search for Sheila.
2. Other than the switcheroo, Loretta has been a good wife, and you've been with her longer than you were with Sheila. Therefore, you just stick with her.
3. You don't like being fooled, and so you choose to be with neither Sheila nor Loretta. You find a divorce lawyer who can help you to divorce Sheila even though she's not present, and argue that Loretta has no parental rights due to her fraud.
4. Other. Explain.
Note: Straight man version is above. If you're something other than a straight man, just switch the gender and/or orientations as needed to match your life.
