CowboyStar88
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It’s been a very tough couple of days for me. On Friday Jan 9th at 5:20 my sweet Hope passed peacefully besides me. She was 13 years old and was 8lbs of pure joy and love.
What’s crazy is I’ve never experienced such a bond like the one I shared with her. 13 years ago on November 22 2013 my ex wanted to adopt another dog (we had 3 at the time, and only 1 still remains. I kept the dogs in the divorce because it was a stable environment). She found this tiny 5 month old small mixed terrier that was fostered ready for adoption. She was probably about 1.5lbs. We get there go to the cage locked eyes with her she was terrified.
They take us to the play pen to introduce us. Not sure what we were expecting I kneel down and she handler sets her down and this little dog comes to life in the most sassy spunky way. She started rolling around in the leaves trying to play with me. I was hooked we were not leaving without her. It took less than 20 seconds to make that decision. On the way home she sat in my lap as happy as could be (this is what she lived for). We were trying to come up with a name, and I looked at her and I said Hope, we gotta name her Hope.
Why Hope? She never gave up waiting for her happiness, she Hoped for a special bond. We get home and she just slept on my chest content, happy, and loved. I would come home from work and who was it waiting for me? This tiny little dog, what did she want to do? Sleep in my lap. I was her guy, and she was mine. Never could I have imagined this tiny little dog would run my world and provide me a love I’ve never known.
Over the years she got to experience, camping (she had to ride shotgun) she got to experience the beach (her happy place) she would herd all of my friends together to make sure nobody was left behind! Have you ever seen an 8lb herd dog before? Adorable. She loves to travel in the RV she got to experience 4 states and bunch of cool places.
Hope stated to make these noises when I would rub her head I called them love snorts, and she would take her tiny nose and give you nose bumps. She would sleep above my head or right next to me. Everything I did in life revolved making sure I got home to her as soon as I could. I don’t want to go out at night or in the weekends, because I knew she would be staying at the door waiting for me. I cooked her fresh food daily.
The hole in my heart is so massive, nothing makes me happy. I miss her so much. I buried her on my dad’s property and I’m making her headstone so I can visit her whenever. I’m 45 years old and I’ve never felt this much grief in my life. How do I move on? Nothing feels normal, nothing matters, I don’t see any joy in anything. She saved me at some of my lowest points in life. I have 3 dogs still 2 sisters I took in a couple of years ago, and my Miles that I rescued back in 2011. I continue my days for them, but it’s different. I’m sad when I get their food ready, or when I give them treats.
I just want my little girl back.
Rest easy my sweet princess.
What’s crazy is I’ve never experienced such a bond like the one I shared with her. 13 years ago on November 22 2013 my ex wanted to adopt another dog (we had 3 at the time, and only 1 still remains. I kept the dogs in the divorce because it was a stable environment). She found this tiny 5 month old small mixed terrier that was fostered ready for adoption. She was probably about 1.5lbs. We get there go to the cage locked eyes with her she was terrified.
They take us to the play pen to introduce us. Not sure what we were expecting I kneel down and she handler sets her down and this little dog comes to life in the most sassy spunky way. She started rolling around in the leaves trying to play with me. I was hooked we were not leaving without her. It took less than 20 seconds to make that decision. On the way home she sat in my lap as happy as could be (this is what she lived for). We were trying to come up with a name, and I looked at her and I said Hope, we gotta name her Hope.
Why Hope? She never gave up waiting for her happiness, she Hoped for a special bond. We get home and she just slept on my chest content, happy, and loved. I would come home from work and who was it waiting for me? This tiny little dog, what did she want to do? Sleep in my lap. I was her guy, and she was mine. Never could I have imagined this tiny little dog would run my world and provide me a love I’ve never known.
Over the years she got to experience, camping (she had to ride shotgun) she got to experience the beach (her happy place) she would herd all of my friends together to make sure nobody was left behind! Have you ever seen an 8lb herd dog before? Adorable. She loves to travel in the RV she got to experience 4 states and bunch of cool places.
Hope stated to make these noises when I would rub her head I called them love snorts, and she would take her tiny nose and give you nose bumps. She would sleep above my head or right next to me. Everything I did in life revolved making sure I got home to her as soon as I could. I don’t want to go out at night or in the weekends, because I knew she would be staying at the door waiting for me. I cooked her fresh food daily.
The hole in my heart is so massive, nothing makes me happy. I miss her so much. I buried her on my dad’s property and I’m making her headstone so I can visit her whenever. I’m 45 years old and I’ve never felt this much grief in my life. How do I move on? Nothing feels normal, nothing matters, I don’t see any joy in anything. She saved me at some of my lowest points in life. I have 3 dogs still 2 sisters I took in a couple of years ago, and my Miles that I rescued back in 2011. I continue my days for them, but it’s different. I’m sad when I get their food ready, or when I give them treats.
I just want my little girl back.
Rest easy my sweet princess.
(edit - but I know every piece was worth giving)
