The Cowboys' Wade Phillips is Deteriorating into a Bad Coach and an Even Worse Leader

[cowboyjoe]

By Richie Whitt
Published on October 14, 2009 at 10:20am

I've called him Stumbledoofus. I've labeled him Dead Man Coaching. I've questioned his moves, his non-moves, his dumpy demeanor and his illogical explanations for everything in between.

But I am not calling for Dallas Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips to be fired before sundown. That will happen soon enough: As in the first week of January, after he again coaches a talented roster out of the NFL playoffs.

Sad thing is, we're getting from Phillips exactly what we desperately desired after three years of tyranny and brow-beating from Bill Parcells. More honesty. More humanity. More empathy. But, in the end, less results. File this in the folder tabbed "Be Careful What You Ask For," because this is officially an embarrassment.

Dear Jerry Jones,

For the love of Tom Landry, isn't there someone, anyone who can slide into the chasm of coaching styles between Parcells' Fidel Castro and Phillips' Andy Griffith?

Until we start seriously vetting possible successors like Bill Cowher, Mike Shanahan and Mike Holmgren, let me make a plea to our current coach. In the off-season—in the wake of a 44-6 loss in Philadelphia that ended the most disappointing season in franchise history—you promised to change. More discipline. Heightened accountability. Dare I say a tougher persona?

You teased us in training camp with consecutive two-a-day practices. I saw you with my own eyes pull players out of drills for pre-snap penalties. Coach Cupcake dissolved into...hardened hope.

But here we are five weeks into the season at 3-2, coming off one of the ugliest victories in the history of the franchise. After a 26-20 overtime escape in Kansas City against a Chiefs team that is 2-28 in its last 30 games and described by Fox analyst Troy Aikman as "pitiful," we see things a tad differently.

You: A win is a win is a win.

The rest of the world: 3-13, here we come.

While you meander about the sideline looking like a janitor who has misplaced his mop bucket, your reputation is crumbling. Your 3-4 defense allows late scoring drives against the New York Giants, Denver Broncos and Chiefs, and you have no answers. Your defensive backs can't tackle, and you inexplicably claim it's because your team doesn't practice full-speed tackling. Your No. 1 running back (Marion Barber) disappears in the second half at Denver, and you claim you didn't know why or even bother to ask. And your offensive coordinator designs last-second plays against the Broncos in which your most reliable receiver (Jason Witten) is used solely as a blocker, and you're fine with the design and the calls.

Which brings us to the real problem: The latest victory.

I've been a Cowboys fan since Dad gave me a better view of Don Meredith's Cotton Bowl bombs to Bob Hayes atop his shoulders, and I'm generally a glass-half-full optimist. But in Kansas City this is what I saw:

A defense called for five offside penalties, including four by four different players in the stretch of seven plays. Swear, volunteer dads at the Pop Warner level don't let that **** happen.

One returner who muffed a punt and another who let a kick bounce at the 15 and trickle down to the three.

A holder who inexplicably failed to turn the laces away from kicker Nick Folk, aiding in his missed 40-yard field goal.

Flozell Adams committing too many penalties to count.

On third-and-26, a safety who should know a simple tackle would force a punt, instead lowering his shoulder in search of a highlight hit and drawing a 15-yard penalty.

Thirteen penalties. 13! Even Jones admitted "we really stunk today relative to making mistakes."

Let's face it, entering the bye week, the Cowboys are a mirror of their head coach. Sloppy, undisciplined, aloof and undeniably mediocre. It's a stupid team that pays zero attention to detail. The Cowboys are talented, but not near good enough to overcome elementary mental blunders.

Then Phillips holds his weekly press conference, and it gets worse. Lather on the sunscreen, because this thing's headed to Hades in a wicker carry-on.

"We had a slow start," Phillips says of falling behind the wholly incompetent Chiefs 10-0 in the second quarter. "I don't know why."

This is the part where the ledge looks awfully inviting.

No anger. No frustration. No promise that heads will roll if it happens again. Just a shrug, a mumble and a head-scratchin' "beats me." Wade Phillips is a docile, doting grandpa who would rather serve up hot biscuits than criticism. Makes him a great neighbor and an incompetent head football coach.

Last Monday at Valley Ranch, while Cowboys fans agreed that performances like the one against the Chiefs would get their team's noggin' bashed in against the Giants or Atlanta Falcons or Philadelphia Eagles, a defiant—or perhaps just dumbfounded—Phillips actually contended "we're only a couple plays from being 5-0."

Yeah, and I'm only a couple lottery tickets from being debt-free.

Look, I'd rather ingest a Red Bull than dissect the Red Zone, but I know what Cowboys fans want to hear. And it sure the hell ain't "we're almost 5-0." Who is Phillips coaching, the Cowboys or Avis? We want Super Bowls, not second place.

At the risk of not cherishing Phillips' time-honored crutch of excuses and coddling, allow me to pen a bye-week speech for the Cowboys' head coach that might actually inject hope into the season's final 11 games. Goes something like this:

I realize there's a long-standing tradition in the NFL of not apologizing for wins. But screw that, I'm sorry for that pathetic display of football in Kansas City. It's inexcusable. It's unacceptable. I'll do everything in my power as the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys to never let it happen again.

We were fortunate to escape with a win, but you and I and my team realize that repeat performances will not only result in losses, but also in us missing the playoffs and me being out of work. Which is the way it should be. I'm ultimately accountable for my team and my players, and right now we're not playing at a satisfactory level.

We're better than this, and it will get better.

I could stand up here and claim we're close to being 5-0, but the reality is we're also just as close to being 1-4. We're 3-2, not exactly time to get out the hats 'n' horns. We've got some players—some veterans—who aren't performing. From here on out I demand hungry players. Players not only ready to win, but unwilling to accept losing. If not, I'm pretty sure we still have an asthma field out back.

Jerry Jones has provided this team the resources to win on and off the field. The fans have shown up and remained loyal through 13 years without a single playoff win.

At some point the onus is on the Dallas Cowboys—that's me through the assistants down to the 53 players—to stop making excuses and accepting mediocrity.

Now if you'll excuse me, my team has a hell of a lot of work to do, and it starts right here, right now.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Wade Phillips nap.

hey dc what did you think about this?

 

[NewJCowboy]

By Richie Whitt
Published on October 14, 2009 at 10:20am

I've called him Stumbledoofus. I've labeled him Dead Man Coaching. I've questioned his moves, his non-moves, his dumpy demeanor and his illogical explanations for everything in between.

But I am not calling for Dallas Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips to be fired before sundown. That will happen soon enough: As in the first week of January, after he again coaches a talented roster out of the NFL playoffs.

Sad thing is, we're getting from Phillips exactly what we desperately desired after three years of tyranny and brow-beating from Bill Parcells. More honesty. More humanity. More empathy. But, in the end, less results. File this in the folder tabbed "Be Careful What You Ask For," because this is officially an embarrassment.

Dear Jerry Jones,

For the love of Tom Landry, isn't there someone, anyone who can slide into the chasm of coaching styles between Parcells' Fidel Castro and Phillips' Andy Griffith?

Until we start seriously vetting possible successors like Bill Cowher, Mike Shanahan and Mike Holmgren, let me make a plea to our current coach. In the off-season—in the wake of a 44-6 loss in Philadelphia that ended the most disappointing season in franchise history—you promised to change. More discipline. Heightened accountability. Dare I say a tougher persona?

You teased us in training camp with consecutive two-a-day practices. I saw you with my own eyes pull players out of drills for pre-snap penalties. Coach Cupcake dissolved into...hardened hope.

But here we are five weeks into the season at 3-2, coming off one of the ugliest victories in the history of the franchise. After a 26-20 overtime escape in Kansas City against a Chiefs team that is 2-28 in its last 30 games and described by Fox analyst Troy Aikman as "pitiful," we see things a tad differently.

You: A win is a win is a win.

The rest of the world: 3-13, here we come.

While you meander about the sideline looking like a janitor who has misplaced his mop bucket, your reputation is crumbling. Your 3-4 defense allows late scoring drives against the New York Giants, Denver Broncos and Chiefs, and you have no answers. Your defensive backs can't tackle, and you inexplicably claim it's because your team doesn't practice full-speed tackling. Your No. 1 running back (Marion Barber) disappears in the second half at Denver, and you claim you didn't know why or even bother to ask. And your offensive coordinator designs last-second plays against the Broncos in which your most reliable receiver (Jason Witten) is used solely as a blocker, and you're fine with the design and the calls.

Which brings us to the real problem: The latest victory.

I've been a Cowboys fan since Dad gave me a better view of Don Meredith's Cotton Bowl bombs to Bob Hayes atop his shoulders, and I'm generally a glass-half-full optimist. But in Kansas City this is what I saw:

A defense called for five offside penalties, including four by four different players in the stretch of seven plays. Swear, volunteer dads at the Pop Warner level don't let that **** happen.

One returner who muffed a punt and another who let a kick bounce at the 15 and trickle down to the three.

A holder who inexplicably failed to turn the laces away from kicker Nick Folk, aiding in his missed 40-yard field goal.

Flozell Adams committing too many penalties to count.

On third-and-26, a safety who should know a simple tackle would force a punt, instead lowering his shoulder in search of a highlight hit and drawing a 15-yard penalty.

Thirteen penalties. 13! Even Jones admitted "we really stunk today relative to making mistakes."

Let's face it, entering the bye week, the Cowboys are a mirror of their head coach. Sloppy, undisciplined, aloof and undeniably mediocre. It's a stupid team that pays zero attention to detail. The Cowboys are talented, but not near good enough to overcome elementary mental blunders.

Then Phillips holds his weekly press conference, and it gets worse. Lather on the sunscreen, because this thing's headed to Hades in a wicker carry-on.

"We had a slow start," Phillips says of falling behind the wholly incompetent Chiefs 10-0 in the second quarter. "I don't know why."

This is the part where the ledge looks awfully inviting.

No anger. No frustration. No promise that heads will roll if it happens again. Just a shrug, a mumble and a head-scratchin' "beats me." Wade Phillips is a docile, doting grandpa who would rather serve up hot biscuits than criticism. Makes him a great neighbor and an incompetent head football coach.

Last Monday at Valley Ranch, while Cowboys fans agreed that performances like the one against the Chiefs would get their team's noggin' bashed in against the Giants or Atlanta Falcons or Philadelphia Eagles, a defiant—or perhaps just dumbfounded—Phillips actually contended "we're only a couple plays from being 5-0."

Yeah, and I'm only a couple lottery tickets from being debt-free.

Look, I'd rather ingest a Red Bull than dissect the Red Zone, but I know what Cowboys fans want to hear. And it sure the hell ain't "we're almost 5-0." Who is Phillips coaching, the Cowboys or Avis? We want Super Bowls, not second place.

At the risk of not cherishing Phillips' time-honored crutch of excuses and coddling, allow me to pen a bye-week speech for the Cowboys' head coach that might actually inject hope into the season's final 11 games. Goes something like this:

I realize there's a long-standing tradition in the NFL of not apologizing for wins. But screw that, I'm sorry for that pathetic display of football in Kansas City. It's inexcusable. It's unacceptable. I'll do everything in my power as the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys to never let it happen again.

We were fortunate to escape with a win, but you and I and my team realize that repeat performances will not only result in losses, but also in us missing the playoffs and me being out of work. Which is the way it should be. I'm ultimately accountable for my team and my players, and right now we're not playing at a satisfactory level.

We're better than this, and it will get better.

I could stand up here and claim we're close to being 5-0, but the reality is we're also just as close to being 1-4. We're 3-2, not exactly time to get out the hats 'n' horns. We've got some players—some veterans—who aren't performing. From here on out I demand hungry players. Players not only ready to win, but unwilling to accept losing. If not, I'm pretty sure we still have an asthma field out back.

Jerry Jones has provided this team the resources to win on and off the field. The fans have shown up and remained loyal through 13 years without a single playoff win.

At some point the onus is on the Dallas Cowboys—that's me through the assistants down to the 53 players—to stop making excuses and accepting mediocrity.

Now if you'll excuse me, my team has a hell of a lot of work to do, and it starts right here, right now.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Wade Phillips nap.

It amazes me that these hacks actually think that they speak for all Cowboy fans. Too funny...

 

[Cover 2]

Any way we can get a poll to see what percentage of Cowboys fans think Wade is doing a good job?

 

[Gibby!]

Well first, I still think this idea that we are so uber-talented is wrong, but anyway...

No, I don't think these disussions would occur anywhere else. Not at the level they are here.

It wouldn't even be going on if Wade looked different. This is the kind of stuff he gets:



That's just small of Whitt, and stupid. Not every good football coach looks like John Harbaugh... But to some people, that's supremely important.

Just look at all the fans Gruden has, because he's telegenic and good with a quote. Hey, like I've always said, let's just go to Central Casting and get someone who looks like a coach and has great PCs. Who gives a damn if he's shown he can coach or not -- that's way down the list in importance.

I will say one other thing: This board used to be the most intelligent, adult one out there. I know that's why I liked it so much. But lately, it's gone way downhill. Never thought I'd say that, either. (Not speaking of you, 4ever.)

lol nice post.

Been on that ledge myself lately, I just have to convince / remind myself that if all these GM's, HC's, and OC's were so good, then why are they obviously still available... Half of them can't even spell, let alone manage a team.

My ignore list has grown so large, that sometimes the first 10 or 15 posts are all ignored. ugh.

 

[Skin]

I will say one other thing: This board used to be the most intelligent, adult one out there. I know that's why I liked it so much. But lately, it's gone way downhill. Never thought I'd say that, either. (Not speaking of you, 4ever.)

Lately, it's fallen off a cliff.

 

[big dog cowboy]

Any way we can get a poll to see what percentage of Cowboys fans think Wade is doing a good job?

Just start a new thread with a poll.

 

[Switz]

The Cowboys' Wade Phillips is Deteriorating into a Bad Coach and an Even Worse Leader

when was he ever a good coach? when was he a good leader ?

Bill Cowher, Mike Shanahan and Mike Holmgren,

I don't want any of these clowns..

Cowher failed for 14 season in Pittsburgh before he ever won a superbowl... I dont care about wins and beating up on the AFC north... I want superbowls..

Shanny after elway left did NOTHING.

Mike H... well I give him credit for getting seatlle to the superbowl but I dont want him


we need fresh blood a Tomlin type.. a leader of men.. who that is IDK but we need some new blood

 

[Goldenrichards83]

By Richie Whitt
Published on October 14, 2009 at 10:20am

I've called him Stumbledoofus. I've labeled him Dead Man Coaching. I've questioned his moves, his non-moves, his dumpy demeanor and his illogical explanations for everything in between.

But I am not calling for Dallas Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips to be fired before sundown. That will happen soon enough: As in the first week of January, after he again coaches a talented roster out of the NFL playoffs.

Sad thing is, we're getting from Phillips exactly what we desperately desired after three years of tyranny and brow-beating from Bill Parcells. More honesty. More humanity. More empathy. But, in the end, less results. File this in the folder tabbed "Be Careful What You Ask For," because this is officially an embarrassment.

Dear Jerry Jones,

For the love of Tom Landry, isn't there someone, anyone who can slide into the chasm of coaching styles between Parcells' Fidel Castro and Phillips' Andy Griffith?

Until we start seriously vetting possible successors like Bill Cowher, Mike Shanahan and Mike Holmgren, let me make a plea to our current coach. In the off-season—in the wake of a 44-6 loss in Philadelphia that ended the most disappointing season in franchise history—you promised to change. More discipline. Heightened accountability. Dare I say a tougher persona?

You teased us in training camp with consecutive two-a-day practices. I saw you with my own eyes pull players out of drills for pre-snap penalties. Coach Cupcake dissolved into...hardened hope.

But here we are five weeks into the season at 3-2, coming off one of the ugliest victories in the history of the franchise. After a 26-20 overtime escape in Kansas City against a Chiefs team that is 2-28 in its last 30 games and described by Fox analyst Troy Aikman as "pitiful," we see things a tad differently.

You: A win is a win is a win.

The rest of the world: 3-13, here we come.

While you meander about the sideline looking like a janitor who has misplaced his mop bucket, your reputation is crumbling. Your 3-4 defense allows late scoring drives against the New York Giants, Denver Broncos and Chiefs, and you have no answers. Your defensive backs can't tackle, and you inexplicably claim it's because your team doesn't practice full-speed tackling. Your No. 1 running back (Marion Barber) disappears in the second half at Denver, and you claim you didn't know why or even bother to ask. And your offensive coordinator designs last-second plays against the Broncos in which your most reliable receiver (Jason Witten) is used solely as a blocker, and you're fine with the design and the calls.

Which brings us to the real problem: The latest victory.

I've been a Cowboys fan since Dad gave me a better view of Don Meredith's Cotton Bowl bombs to Bob Hayes atop his shoulders, and I'm generally a glass-half-full optimist. But in Kansas City this is what I saw:

A defense called for five offside penalties, including four by four different players in the stretch of seven plays. Swear, volunteer dads at the Pop Warner level don't let that **** happen.

One returner who muffed a punt and another who let a kick bounce at the 15 and trickle down to the three.

A holder who inexplicably failed to turn the laces away from kicker Nick Folk, aiding in his missed 40-yard field goal.

Flozell Adams committing too many penalties to count.

On third-and-26, a safety who should know a simple tackle would force a punt, instead lowering his shoulder in search of a highlight hit and drawing a 15-yard penalty.

Thirteen penalties. 13! Even Jones admitted "we really stunk today relative to making mistakes."

Let's face it, entering the bye week, the Cowboys are a mirror of their head coach. Sloppy, undisciplined, aloof and undeniably mediocre. It's a stupid team that pays zero attention to detail. The Cowboys are talented, but not near good enough to overcome elementary mental blunders.

Then Phillips holds his weekly press conference, and it gets worse. Lather on the sunscreen, because this thing's headed to Hades in a wicker carry-on.

"We had a slow start," Phillips says of falling behind the wholly incompetent Chiefs 10-0 in the second quarter. "I don't know why."

This is the part where the ledge looks awfully inviting.

No anger. No frustration. No promise that heads will roll if it happens again. Just a shrug, a mumble and a head-scratchin' "beats me." Wade Phillips is a docile, doting grandpa who would rather serve up hot biscuits than criticism. Makes him a great neighbor and an incompetent head football coach.

Last Monday at Valley Ranch, while Cowboys fans agreed that performances like the one against the Chiefs would get their team's noggin' bashed in against the Giants or Atlanta Falcons or Philadelphia Eagles, a defiant—or perhaps just dumbfounded—Phillips actually contended "we're only a couple plays from being 5-0."

Yeah, and I'm only a couple lottery tickets from being debt-free.

Look, I'd rather ingest a Red Bull than dissect the Red Zone, but I know what Cowboys fans want to hear. And it sure the hell ain't "we're almost 5-0." Who is Phillips coaching, the Cowboys or Avis? We want Super Bowls, not second place.

At the risk of not cherishing Phillips' time-honored crutch of excuses and coddling, allow me to pen a bye-week speech for the Cowboys' head coach that might actually inject hope into the season's final 11 games. Goes something like this:

I realize there's a long-standing tradition in the NFL of not apologizing for wins. But screw that, I'm sorry for that pathetic display of football in Kansas City. It's inexcusable. It's unacceptable. I'll do everything in my power as the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys to never let it happen again.

We were fortunate to escape with a win, but you and I and my team realize that repeat performances will not only result in losses, but also in us missing the playoffs and me being out of work. Which is the way it should be. I'm ultimately accountable for my team and my players, and right now we're not playing at a satisfactory level.

We're better than this, and it will get better.

I could stand up here and claim we're close to being 5-0, but the reality is we're also just as close to being 1-4. We're 3-2, not exactly time to get out the hats 'n' horns. We've got some players—some veterans—who aren't performing. From here on out I demand hungry players. Players not only ready to win, but unwilling to accept losing. If not, I'm pretty sure we still have an asthma field out back.

Jerry Jones has provided this team the resources to win on and off the field. The fans have shown up and remained loyal through 13 years without a single playoff win.

At some point the onus is on the Dallas Cowboys—that's me through the assistants down to the 53 players—to stop making excuses and accepting mediocrity.

Now if you'll excuse me, my team has a hell of a lot of work to do, and it starts right here, right now.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Wade Phillips nap.

:clap2:

 

[Idgit]

...I will say one other thing: This board used to be the most intelligent, adult one out there. I know that's why I liked it so much. But lately, it's gone way downhill. Never thought I'd say that, either. (Not speaking of you, 4ever.)

Lately, it's fallen off a cliff.

Definitely off a cliff. There are still plenty of really good, smart posters, but they're drowned out by clueless noisy wangstaz who dominate the best discussions with opinions that aren't worth debating.

 

[Spectre]

By Richie Whitt
Published on October 14, 2009 at 10:20am


Sad thing is, we're getting from Phillips exactly what we desperately desired after three years of tyranny and brow-beating from Bill Parcells. More honesty. More humanity. More empathy. But, in the end, less results. File this in the folder tabbed "Be Careful What You Ask For," because this is officially an embarrassment.
.

How is Wade's 25-10 "less results" than Bill's 34-30?

 

[Cover 2]

How is Wade's 25-10 "less results" than Bill's 34-30?

In all honesty there were under different circumstances. Big Bill was taking over 3 consecutive 5-11 seasons. I'd still say neither blew anyone away though with superb coaching.

 

[Kangaroo]

In all honesty there were under different circumstances. Big Bill was taking over 3 consecutive 5-11 seasons. I'd still say neither blew anyone away though with superb coaching.

Bills first few years where great winning with QC and Hamlin at rb and making the playoffs.

Winning 7 games was Vinny was a miracle then he gets them to the playoffs the last year he looked burnt out that is the year I thought his coaching took a hit

 

[Bigtommyb]

Earlier tonight I was listening to the Wednesday night Legends Show, and Drew Pearson was saying that the Dallas media is the worst anywhere. He said it's worse than even New York, and he's from New Jersey.

He and Nate Newton both agreed that no matter what the media may say, any talk of firing the coach when you're 3-2 is stupid.

This article is over the top even for Whitt, though.

I really think that when Wade goes, we should poll the fans and media and hire whoever wins the vote. We might not get the right coach, but at least we wouldn't have nearly as much *****ing and moaning. It's gotten beyond ridiculous.[/quote


The article was on point , it is about the way we finished ,what ws promised and the way we have played this far. The article was on point, Wade is a clown, plain and simple! This team needs a little fire and he is not the guy for this job, HE NEVER WAS! 13-3, yeh, but our offense was different, and you have to give TO some credit, at least for his presence making others better. I think Parcells was over the top, however Wade is too much the other way? There is too much talent on this team not to be playing better, and thaT FALLS ON THE PLAYERS,YES. It also falls on the way they are being prepared and practiced also, and that falls on the head coach.

 

[Bleu Star]

Get in touch with Hoover and tell them you have a unit you would like to return post haste.

 

[Idgit]

BTW, this was pretty clever, bbgun.

 

[MarionBarberThe4th]

By Richie Whitt
Published on October 14, 2009 at 10:20am

I've called him Stumbledoofus. I've labeled him Dead Man Coaching. I've questioned his moves, his non-moves, his dumpy demeanor and his illogical explanations for everything in between.

But I am not calling for Dallas Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips to be fired before sundown. That will happen soon enough: As in the first week of January, after he again coaches a talented roster out of the NFL playoffs.

Sad thing is, we're getting from Phillips exactly what we desperately desired after three years of tyranny and brow-beating from Bill Parcells. More honesty. More humanity. More empathy. But, in the end, less results. File this in the folder tabbed "Be Careful What You Ask For," because this is officially an embarrassment.

Dear Jerry Jones,

For the love of Tom Landry, isn't there someone, anyone who can slide into the chasm of coaching styles between Parcells' Fidel Castro and Phillips' Andy Griffith?

Until we start seriously vetting possible successors like Bill Cowher, Mike Shanahan and Mike Holmgren, let me make a plea to our current coach. In the off-season—in the wake of a 44-6 loss in Philadelphia that ended the most disappointing season in franchise history—you promised to change. More discipline. Heightened accountability. Dare I say a tougher persona?

You teased us in training camp with consecutive two-a-day practices. I saw you with my own eyes pull players out of drills for pre-snap penalties. Coach Cupcake dissolved into...hardened hope.

But here we are five weeks into the season at 3-2, coming off one of the ugliest victories in the history of the franchise. After a 26-20 overtime escape in Kansas City against a Chiefs team that is 2-28 in its last 30 games and described by Fox analyst Troy Aikman as "pitiful," we see things a tad differently.

You: A win is a win is a win.

The rest of the world: 3-13, here we come.

While you meander about the sideline looking like a janitor who has misplaced his mop bucket, your reputation is crumbling. Your 3-4 defense allows late scoring drives against the New York Giants, Denver Broncos and Chiefs, and you have no answers. Your defensive backs can't tackle, and you inexplicably claim it's because your team doesn't practice full-speed tackling. Your No. 1 running back (Marion Barber) disappears in the second half at Denver, and you claim you didn't know why or even bother to ask. And your offensive coordinator designs last-second plays against the Broncos in which your most reliable receiver (Jason Witten) is used solely as a blocker, and you're fine with the design and the calls.

Which brings us to the real problem: The latest victory.

I've been a Cowboys fan since Dad gave me a better view of Don Meredith's Cotton Bowl bombs to Bob Hayes atop his shoulders, and I'm generally a glass-half-full optimist. But in Kansas City this is what I saw:

A defense called for five offside penalties, including four by four different players in the stretch of seven plays. Swear, volunteer dads at the Pop Warner level don't let that **** happen.

One returner who muffed a punt and another who let a kick bounce at the 15 and trickle down to the three.

A holder who inexplicably failed to turn the laces away from kicker Nick Folk, aiding in his missed 40-yard field goal.

Flozell Adams committing too many penalties to count.

On third-and-26, a safety who should know a simple tackle would force a punt, instead lowering his shoulder in search of a highlight hit and drawing a 15-yard penalty.

Thirteen penalties. 13! Even Jones admitted "we really stunk today relative to making mistakes."

Let's face it, entering the bye week, the Cowboys are a mirror of their head coach. Sloppy, undisciplined, aloof and undeniably mediocre. It's a stupid team that pays zero attention to detail. The Cowboys are talented, but not near good enough to overcome elementary mental blunders.

Then Phillips holds his weekly press conference, and it gets worse. Lather on the sunscreen, because this thing's headed to Hades in a wicker carry-on.

"We had a slow start," Phillips says of falling behind the wholly incompetent Chiefs 10-0 in the second quarter. "I don't know why."

This is the part where the ledge looks awfully inviting.

No anger. No frustration. No promise that heads will roll if it happens again. Just a shrug, a mumble and a head-scratchin' "beats me." Wade Phillips is a docile, doting grandpa who would rather serve up hot biscuits than criticism. Makes him a great neighbor and an incompetent head football coach.

Last Monday at Valley Ranch, while Cowboys fans agreed that performances like the one against the Chiefs would get their team's noggin' bashed in against the Giants or Atlanta Falcons or Philadelphia Eagles, a defiant—or perhaps just dumbfounded—Phillips actually contended "we're only a couple plays from being 5-0."

Yeah, and I'm only a couple lottery tickets from being debt-free.

Look, I'd rather ingest a Red Bull than dissect the Red Zone, but I know what Cowboys fans want to hear. And it sure the hell ain't "we're almost 5-0." Who is Phillips coaching, the Cowboys or Avis? We want Super Bowls, not second place.

At the risk of not cherishing Phillips' time-honored crutch of excuses and coddling, allow me to pen a bye-week speech for the Cowboys' head coach that might actually inject hope into the season's final 11 games. Goes something like this:

I realize there's a long-standing tradition in the NFL of not apologizing for wins. But screw that, I'm sorry for that pathetic display of football in Kansas City. It's inexcusable. It's unacceptable. I'll do everything in my power as the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys to never let it happen again.

We were fortunate to escape with a win, but you and I and my team realize that repeat performances will not only result in losses, but also in us missing the playoffs and me being out of work. Which is the way it should be. I'm ultimately accountable for my team and my players, and right now we're not playing at a satisfactory level.

We're better than this, and it will get better.

I could stand up here and claim we're close to being 5-0, but the reality is we're also just as close to being 1-4. We're 3-2, not exactly time to get out the hats 'n' horns. We've got some players—some veterans—who aren't performing. From here on out I demand hungry players. Players not only ready to win, but unwilling to accept losing. If not, I'm pretty sure we still have an asthma field out back.

Jerry Jones has provided this team the resources to win on and off the field. The fans have shown up and remained loyal through 13 years without a single playoff win.

At some point the onus is on the Dallas Cowboys—that's me through the assistants down to the 53 players—to stop making excuses and accepting mediocrity.

Now if you'll excuse me, my team has a hell of a lot of work to do, and it starts right here, right now.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Wade Phillips nap.

Pretty annoying when people quote huge *** articles

 

[DallasDomination]

If I was standing next to him while He said all that stuff I would have to buy Him a beer and shake his hand.


Good Stuff.

 

[Idgit]

Pretty annoying when people quote huge *** articles

Hate that, too. Especially when I'm viewing on an iphone.