Video: Should Jerry fire her? LOL.

[jobberone]

They are pinheads. Cute pinheads but pinheads none the less.

 

[Hostile]

Okay here goes.

In High School I was a teacher's assistant for one of my Math teachers. He taught 3 subjects and for his free hour he had 3 of us TA's who graded the papers. One of them (Veronica) was the ditziest blond I have ever come across in my life.

One day, Phil (the 3rd TA) and I were talking about football and in particular we were talking about stuff that was uncomfortable. Like taping the ankles and then when you peel it off and hair comes too. Stuff like that.

Inevitably we started talking about how uncomfortable it is to wear a cup, but how necessary they are.

Veronica did not know what we were talking about. She said, "a cup? You wear a cup?"

I replied, "you do if you value your life."

She asked where you wear it. I couldn't believe she didn't know. So we explained to her it was to protect your jewels.

She asked, "which way do you turn the handle, up or down?"

I said, "it's not a coffee cup. It's not a Dixie cup, and you sure don't want to drink anything out of it."

She was lost. So Phil goes to the blackboard and he draws a pretty good representation of a cup, complete with the air holes. Suddenly she perked up all happy.

"I know what those are. My brothers have them. Is that what they are for? I always used to pretend they were oxygen masks and I would breathe through them."

The teacher, Phil, and I all lost it. It is bad enough to admit you don't know what it is, but to also tell us you put them on your face?

The whole time we were laughing she was saying "what? What? What?" She honestly did not know.

Finally right when I am ready to breathe again my teacher, Mr. Cameron, decides to tell her a story that was clearly about a fellow dumb blond who dated one of his Army buddies.

He said, "Veronica, my buddy used to date a girl just like you. One day he told her, 'baby, I want to make love to you standing up in a hammock.'"

That started the laughter all over again. Except Veronica, who didn't get that either.

"A hammock? Why a hammock? Can you really stand up in a hammock? Can you really make love standing up?"

I couldn't breathe.




I swear to you...true story.

 

[tyke1doe]

"I know what those are. My brothers have them. Is that what they are for? I always used to pretend they were oxygen masks and I would breathe through them."

The teacher, Phil, and I all lost it. It is bad enough to admit you don't know what it is, but to also tell us you put them on your face?

I'm sorry to say, but I had a friend who grew up in deep Mississippi and lived a totally sheltered life.

One day, he and some other guys were helping me move into my new home, and he found my cup. (I used to wear one for karate tournaments.) Anyway, he put it over his nose thinking it was a mask.

I had to tell him, "Uh, Bruce? That's a cup that goes over my private area."

He was clueless.

P.S. He wasn't blonde.

 

[KJJ]

Seeing the conversation has turned to "cups" I remember the first time I had to buy a jock. I had just started the 6th grade which is usually the first year you take gym. My PE teacher told us to bring a T-shirt, shorts and a jock to school the next day or else. I was so embarrassed having to buy a jock I didn't even tell my mom I just told her to drop me off at the store I had to pick up some shorts and T-shirt for gym. I'll never forget how nervous I was as I walked around the store looking for a jock. A sales girl came up to me and asked if I needed any help. I took a deep breath, cleared my throat and told her I was looking for a jock. : That was a tough moment. She said "follow me" and led me over to the sporting goods section.

She then asked what size I needed. Now I was REALLY embarrassed! : I didn't know jocks went by waist size I thought they went by cup size so I told her I needed a large. : She gave me a cockeyed look and said "honey you look more like a small to me". I was never so insulted in my life! How the hell would she know how big I am? I told her with a firm voice I needed a LARGE and she rolled her eyes and said "okaaaay". The next day at school none of us during gym class could keep our jocks from falling down because everyone got a large. LOL

 

[ThreeSportStar80]

Okay here goes.

In High School I was a teacher's assistant for one of my Math teachers. He taught 3 subjects and for his free hour he had 3 of us TA's who graded the papers. One of them (Veronica) was the ditziest blond I have ever come across in my life.

One day, Phil (the 3rd TA) and I were talking about football and in particular we were talking about stuff that was uncomfortable. Like taping the ankles and then when you peel it off and hair comes too. Stuff like that.

Inevitably we started talking about how uncomfortable it is to wear a cup, but how necessary they are.

Veronica did not know what we were talking about. She said, "a cup? You wear a cup?"

I replied, "you do if you value your life."

She asked where you wear it. I couldn't believe she didn't know. So we explained to her it was to protect your jewels.

She asked, "which way do you turn the handle, up or down?"

I said, "it's not a coffee cup. It's not a Dixie cup, and you sure don't want to drink anything out of it."

She was lost. So Phil goes to the blackboard and he draws a pretty good representation of a cup, complete with the air holes. Suddenly she perked up all happy.

"I know what those are. My brothers have them. Is that what they are for? I always used to pretend they were oxygen masks and I would breathe through them."

The teacher, Phil, and I all lost it. It is bad enough to admit you don't know what it is, but to also tell us you put them on your face?

The whole time we were laughing she was saying "what? What? What?" She honestly did not know.

Finally right when I am ready to breathe again my teacher, Mr. Cameron, decides to tell her a story that was clearly about a fellow dumb blond who dated one of his Army buddies.

He said, "Veronica, my buddy used to date a girl just like you. One day he told her, 'baby, I want to make love to you standing up in a hammock.'"

That started the laughter all over again. Except Veronica, who didn't get that either.

"A hammock? Why a hammock? Can you really stand up in a hammock? Can you really make love standing up?"

I couldn't breathe.




I swear to you...true story.

Mannnnnnn OMG :laugh2: Oxygen mask huh..... SMH!

 

[Cover 2]

Seeing the conversation has turned to "cups" I remember the first time I had to buy a jock. I had just started the 6th grade which is usually the first year you take gym. My PE teacher told us to bring a T-shirt, shorts and a jock to school the next day or else. I was so embarrassed having to buy a jock I didn't even tell my mom I just told her to drop me off at the store I had to pick up some shorts and T-shirt for gym. I'll never forget how nervous I was as I walked around the store looking for a jock. A sales girl came up to me and asked if I needed any help. I took a deep breath, cleared my throat and told her I was looking for a jock. : That was a tough moment. She said "follow me" and led me over to the sporting goods section.

She then asked what size I needed. Now I was REALLY embarrassed! : I didn't know jocks went by waist size I thought they went by cup size so I told her I needed a large. : She gave me a cockeyed look and said "honey you look more like a small to me". I was never so insulted in my life! How the hell would she know how big I am? I told her with a firm voice I needed a LARGE and she rolled her eyes and said "okaaaay". The next day at school none of us during gym class could keep our jocks from falling down because everyone got a large. LOL

:laugh2:

 

[silverbear]

[youtube]XV0pRl42j9o[/youtube]
--------------------------

Cute or Not Cute?

I don't know, but I liked the part where she jumped up and down...

 

[DallasDW00ds0n]

mORE@

 

[silverbear]

Seeing the conversation has turned to "cups" I remember the first time I had to buy a jock. I had just started the 6th grade which is usually the first year you take gym. My PE teacher told us to bring a T-shirt, shorts and a jock to school the next day or else. I was so embarrassed having to buy a jock I didn't even tell my mom I just told her to drop me off at the store I had to pick up some shorts and T-shirt for gym. I'll never forget how nervous I was as I walked around the store looking for a jock. A sales girl came up to me and asked if I needed any help. I took a deep breath, cleared my throat and told her I was looking for a jock. : That was a tough moment. She said "follow me" and led me over to the sporting goods section.

She then asked what size I needed. Now I was REALLY embarrassed! : I didn't know jocks went by waist size I thought they went by cup size so I told her I needed a large. : She gave me a cockeyed look and said "honey you look more like a small to me". I was never so insulted in my life! How the hell would she know how big I am? I told her with a firm voice I needed a LARGE and she rolled her eyes and said "okaaaay". The next day at school none of us during gym class could keep our jocks from falling down because everyone got a large. LOL

Lemme guess-- the first time you went to the drug store to buy condoms, you INSISTED on magnums...

I just wonder if you had cojones enough to return them when you found they didn't fit...

 

[67CowboysFan]

I remember when my step son first started playing football. He never mentioned it but the coach told them to make sure they got a cup over the weekend and to make sure they wore it to practice. So I come downstairs early Saturday morning and there he is in the kitchen trying to fit a plastic drinking cup trying to figure out why he would need one of these to play football.

I asked him what he was doing and he tells me he needs a cup to play football and was trying to find one that fit. I had tears running down my face and thought I would bust a lung trying to hold back the laughter.

btw, he's blonde too.

 

[KJJ]

Lemme guess-- the first time you went to the drug store to buy condoms, you INSISTED on magnums...

I just wonder if you had cojones enough to return them when you found they didn't fit...

I stole my first condoms. :shush: I was way too embarrassed to buy them so I went into a drug store and opened a box took a couple out and slipped them in my pocket and casually walked out whistling with a copy of Penthouse stuffed under my shirt. LOL Like most 13 year olds I put one of the condoms in my wallet preparing for that special moment. My mom asked me what that round worn out circle was on the outside of my wallet and I stammered and told her it was a lucky silver dollar. : When the magic night finally arrived 3 years later I nervously opened the condom in the back seat of my dads Buick and it broke like a potato chip. My girlfriend looked at me and said those dreaded words "no glove no love". :nono2: So we drove to a gas station and I bought one in one of those condom machines in the restroom. It had ticklers all over it and it glowed in the dark. I still remember my first sexual experience it was the greatest 60 seconds of my life. :bounce:

 

[silverbear]

I still remember my first sexual experience it was the greatest 60 seconds of my life. :bounce:

More like the greatest 20 seconds, and I'm counting the time it took you to get the condom on... LOL...

 

[KJJ]

More like the greatest 20 seconds, and I'm counting the time it took you to get the condom on... LOL...

Then your first experience was quicker than mine. LOL I stole 2 condoms I used the first one as practice so I could get it on quick before the girl changed her mine. I almost got lucky a few months earlier but during the heat of the moment the girl I was with told me she was brought up that premarital sex was a sin. I told her it is but as long as we never get married it's okay. :

 

[silverbear]

I almost got lucky a few months earlier but during the heat of the moment the girl I was with told me she was brought up that premarital sex was a sin. I told her it is but as long as we never get married it's okay. :

OK, now I call that quick thinking... good for you...

 

[jackrussell]

Gotta love a girl that can breathe through her nose.

 

[Kaika]

 

[cowboyfan4life_mark]

Gotta love a girl that can breathe through her nose.

Best reply so far!!

 

[proline]

[youtube]XV0pRl42j9o[/youtube]

I'm sure she learned that one time at band camp ....

 

[cowboyjoe]

Why am I smiling so much?

watch that smiling hostile, remember your married;

 

[Bleu Star]

I don't know, but I liked the part where she jumped up and down...

I did too!

The girl with the dimples has one of the greatest smiles I have ever seen.

Thanks DC.