bobtheflob
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Things are a little slow right now so I thought I'd post something that I thought was pretty funny.
http://jibjab.com/JokeBox/JokeBox.aspx?Id=95096&JokeId=39073
We know what happened to Ben in the situation with the
bike, but what if it had happened to a different
player?
Drew Bledsoe – Same thing as Ben, but it would've been
on a stationary bike.
Eli Manning – Archie would have intervened and forced
Philip Rivers to get on the motorcycle.
Donovan McNabb – He would have come under scorching
criticism from Terrell Owens.
Mark Brunell – He would have thanked God for giving
him that wonderful experience and would have tried to
baptize the driver of the car.
Brett Favre – He would have received enormous national
coverage and sympathy, and would decide to contemplate
retirement for a couple of months.
Brad Johnson – Nobody would have noticed.
Rex Grossman – This is a trick question, because
Grossman would've been in the hospital before the
wreck even happened.
Josh McCown – Matt Millen would’ve traded him for a
wide receiver.
Chris Simms – People would’ve thought he was Brad
Johnson.
Michael Vick – The media would be commenting on how he
face-planted spectacularly, and no other quarterback
could’ve done it.
Matt Schaub - Everyone would still want him because he
torched the Patriots.
Drew Brees – He would’ve been traded or cut because,
hey, when you’ve got Reggie Bush you don’t need any
other players.
Jake Delhomme – He would have survived and been okay,
but people would credit Julius Peppers for saving him.
Alex Smith – He would’ve secretly been grateful for
missing the 49ers’ season.
Matt Leinart – He would’ve dropped drastically on the
draft chart amidst rumors that he can’t take a hit.
Matt Hasselbeck – He would’ve been embarrassed,
because five seconds before the crash he would have
predicted that he would beat the car.
Marc Bulger – (Long silence). I got nothing. There’s
not a single thing about Bulger that’s interesting.
Gus Frerotte - He'd be fine, his head has hurt
before...
J.P. Losman – He would’ve overshot and missed the car
completely.
Daunte Culpepper – Three years ago, he would have
crushed the car and kept on going. Now, he would be
injured and the driver of the car would have ended up
with everything he was carrying.
Chad Pennington – He would’ve been injured. Duh.
Tom Brady – Angels would have descended and saved Tom
from harm, and then after the other car stopped, Tom
would have climbed into the back seat and given the
driver a neck massage to calm her down.
Charlie Batch - Pittsburgh would be fine, because
elite backup Omar Jacobs would fill in for him.
Steve McNair – He would have walked it off, because
Steve McNair is tough, man. He’s really tough.
Everyone would have been talking about how tough he
is.
Kyle Boller - Out of anger, he would've hurled the car
60 yards on one knee.
Carson Palmer – Kimo Von Oelhoffen would have been
ticketed for an illegal left turn.
Charlie Frye – Trent Dilfer would return to
Cleveland,take over the team, win a Super Bowl*, and
then get cut when Elvis Grbac decided to come out of
retirement
Peyton Manning – During his first year back, the NFL
would institute a special rule that nobody is allowed
to touch Manning, and he only has to say the name of a
receiver for it to count as a completed pass.
Vince Young – Pfft. As if anything could hit Vince
Young...
Byron Leftwich – He would’ve been okay, but Fred
Taylor would have been hospitalized with sympathy
pains.
David Carr – He would’ve been fine. He takes harder
hits than that every Sunday.
Trent Green – If you think that car would’ve made it
past Willie Roaf and Will Shields, you’re crazy.
Aaron Brooks – Al Davis would blame Art Shell and then
fire him.
Philip Rivers – Nobody knows...nobody has any idea at
all.
Jake Plummer – He wouldn’t have hit the windshield at
all, because Broncos only hit in the back
http://jibjab.com/JokeBox/JokeBox.aspx?Id=95096&JokeId=39073
We know what happened to Ben in the situation with the
bike, but what if it had happened to a different
player?
Drew Bledsoe – Same thing as Ben, but it would've been
on a stationary bike.
Eli Manning – Archie would have intervened and forced
Philip Rivers to get on the motorcycle.
Donovan McNabb – He would have come under scorching
criticism from Terrell Owens.
Mark Brunell – He would have thanked God for giving
him that wonderful experience and would have tried to
baptize the driver of the car.
Brett Favre – He would have received enormous national
coverage and sympathy, and would decide to contemplate
retirement for a couple of months.
Brad Johnson – Nobody would have noticed.
Rex Grossman – This is a trick question, because
Grossman would've been in the hospital before the
wreck even happened.
Josh McCown – Matt Millen would’ve traded him for a
wide receiver.
Chris Simms – People would’ve thought he was Brad
Johnson.
Michael Vick – The media would be commenting on how he
face-planted spectacularly, and no other quarterback
could’ve done it.
Matt Schaub - Everyone would still want him because he
torched the Patriots.
Drew Brees – He would’ve been traded or cut because,
hey, when you’ve got Reggie Bush you don’t need any
other players.
Jake Delhomme – He would have survived and been okay,
but people would credit Julius Peppers for saving him.
Alex Smith – He would’ve secretly been grateful for
missing the 49ers’ season.
Matt Leinart – He would’ve dropped drastically on the
draft chart amidst rumors that he can’t take a hit.
Matt Hasselbeck – He would’ve been embarrassed,
because five seconds before the crash he would have
predicted that he would beat the car.
Marc Bulger – (Long silence). I got nothing. There’s
not a single thing about Bulger that’s interesting.
Gus Frerotte - He'd be fine, his head has hurt
before...
J.P. Losman – He would’ve overshot and missed the car
completely.
Daunte Culpepper – Three years ago, he would have
crushed the car and kept on going. Now, he would be
injured and the driver of the car would have ended up
with everything he was carrying.
Chad Pennington – He would’ve been injured. Duh.
Tom Brady – Angels would have descended and saved Tom
from harm, and then after the other car stopped, Tom
would have climbed into the back seat and given the
driver a neck massage to calm her down.
Charlie Batch - Pittsburgh would be fine, because
elite backup Omar Jacobs would fill in for him.
Steve McNair – He would have walked it off, because
Steve McNair is tough, man. He’s really tough.
Everyone would have been talking about how tough he
is.
Kyle Boller - Out of anger, he would've hurled the car
60 yards on one knee.
Carson Palmer – Kimo Von Oelhoffen would have been
ticketed for an illegal left turn.
Charlie Frye – Trent Dilfer would return to
Cleveland,take over the team, win a Super Bowl*, and
then get cut when Elvis Grbac decided to come out of
retirement
Peyton Manning – During his first year back, the NFL
would institute a special rule that nobody is allowed
to touch Manning, and he only has to say the name of a
receiver for it to count as a completed pass.
Vince Young – Pfft. As if anything could hit Vince
Young...
Byron Leftwich – He would’ve been okay, but Fred
Taylor would have been hospitalized with sympathy
pains.
David Carr – He would’ve been fine. He takes harder
hits than that every Sunday.
Trent Green – If you think that car would’ve made it
past Willie Roaf and Will Shields, you’re crazy.
Aaron Brooks – Al Davis would blame Art Shell and then
fire him.
Philip Rivers – Nobody knows...nobody has any idea at
all.
Jake Plummer – He wouldn’t have hit the windshield at
all, because Broncos only hit in the back