Post about your psychic abilities

[Reverend Conehead]

I wish I had lots of psychic abilities like foretelling the future, reading minds, bending or melting objects with your mind, contacting the dead, etc., but I can't do any of that stuff. However, I have been blessed (or cursed) with one infallible psychic ability and that's choosing a shopping cart with at least one trashed wheel. I'm really, really good at this one. I swear, every time I grab a shopping cart, it always has a bum wheel. I'm infallible at this ability. Unfortunately, it's not much use. I really wish I had inherited better psychic abilities, but this is the only one I have. Anyone know how I could market it and make a bundle of money?
...
I had a friend who got called in for jury duty, and she wrote on her questionnaire, "I can tell just by looking at someone if they're guilty or innocent because I'm psychic." Then her feelings were hurt when they immediately rejected her. Those idiots. How often do you meet someone who can do that?

 

[darthseinfeld]

My breasts can tell when its raining

Hi, Im Amanda Seyfried

 

[nobody]

I wish I had lots of psychic abilities like foretelling the future, reading minds, bending or melting objects with your mind, contacting the dead, etc., but I can't do any of that stuff. However, I have been blessed (or cursed) with one infallible psychic ability and that's choosing a shopping cart with at least one trashed wheel. I'm really, really good at this one. I swear, every time I grab a shopping cart, it always has a bum wheel. I'm infallible at this ability. Unfortunately, it's not much use. I really wish I had inherited better psychic abilities, but this is the only one I have. Anyone know how I could market it and make a bundle of money?
...
I had a friend who got called in for jury duty, and she wrote on her questionnaire, "I can tell just by looking at someone if they're guilty or innocent because I'm psychic." Then her feelings were hurt when they immediately rejected her. Those idiots. How often do you meet someone who can do that?

....that's brilliant.

 

[Hoofbite]

....that's brilliant.

Also probably unlikely to work, and even if it was successful you'd be thrown back into the jury pool with a "chance" to be selected again. When I was on jury duty, just getting to the point in the process where it's asked if there's any reason why you can't be an impartial juror, it was past lunch. Half a day already shot to hell just waiting to see if I was going to be picked as a juror.

 

[BrAinPaiNt]

My Psychic ability is so powerful that when I seen the title of this thread I knew who started the thread without looking.

 

[Reverend Conehead]

Also probably unlikely to work, and even if it was successful you'd be thrown back into the jury pool with a "chance" to be selected again. When I was on jury duty, just getting to the point in the process where it's asked if there's any reason why you can't be an impartial juror, it was past lunch. Half a day already shot to hell just waiting to see if I was going to be picked as a juror.

It "worked" for her because it wasn't a ploy to get out of jury duty. She genuinely believed she was psychic and that her supernatural abilities would be an asset to the jury. She wanted jury duty. Her feelings were hurt when she didn't get it. I had to explain to her that it was nothing personal. I really should say it didn't work for her. She didn't want to be dismissed.

This is someone I used to date. It's probably not too terribly difficult to figure out why I didn't marry her.

 

[Reverend Conehead]

My Psychic ability is so powerful that when I seen the title of this thread I knew who started the thread without looking.

LOL. Please don't spill the bean on that terrible thing I did on January 10, 1982.

 

[DUO_CORE]

 

[kskboys]

It "worked" for her because it wasn't a ploy to get out of jury duty. She genuinely believed she was psychic and that her supernatural abilities would be an asset to the jury. She wanted jury duty. Her feelings were hurt when she didn't get it. I had to explain to her that it was nothing personal. I really should say it didn't work for her. She didn't want to be dismissed.

This is someone I used to date. It's probably not too terribly difficult to figure out why I didn't marry her.

She's a cat?