CowboyWay
If Coach would have put me in, we'd a won State
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- 4,445
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http://www.hogshaven.com/2009/2/27/774435/roger-goodell-calls-dan-sn
Roger Goodell calls Dan Snyder to discuss the salary cap
[start recording]
RG: ::dials 1-703-555-CASH::
DS's secretary: "Thank you for calling Commanders Park, Mr. Goodell. Mr. Snyder will be with you in a few moments."
::2 minutes later::
DS: "Roger! How are you? How are things in New York? Always great to talk to you!"
RG: “Mr. Snyder, this is commissioner Goodell calling. We’d like to talk to you about the salary cap.”
DS: "Say... that sure was a pretty fancy necktie you had at the last league meeting... give you two 1st round picks for it?"
RG: "Mr. Snyder, I'm the commissioner... can't use draft picks..."
DS: "Fine. Three 1st round picks, but no higher!"
RG: "Mr. Snyder, about the salary ca..."
DS: "FOUR 1st round picks. Final offer."
RG: "NO, Mr. Snyder, you cannot have my tie. Now, about the salary cap?"
DS: “Errrm.... okay. ::sounds nervous:: Ah, yes. The salary cap. Great invention, creates parity throughout the league by preventing rich guys from spending their own money. Okay, so what did you want to talk about?”
RG: “Well… firstly, we’re not sure that your contract with Albert Haynesworth will allow you to stay under the cap…”
DS: “Albert who?”
RG: “Albert Haynesworth?”
DS: “Who?”
RG: “…….."
RG: "Okay, nevermind, we can come back to that. The DeAngelo Hall contract also pushes you over the top.”
DS: “DeAngelo — You mean DeAngelo Williams? He plays for the Panthers. Talk to them. Wait — is he a free agent too??”
RG: “No, DeAngelo Hall, the cornerback you just signe….. know what? Skip it.”
DS: “Alright. I honestly have no idea who you’re talking about.”
RG: “Now, on to your $700 million, 40 year contract to Derrick Dockery. This deal also places you in violation of the salary cap.”
DS: “Well, only $10 million of that is guaranteed, so — errr, I mean… who is Derrick Dockery? I don’t really know what you’re talking about.”
RG: “………..”
DS: "........."
RG: ::click::
VC: "Who was that?"
DS: "Must have had the wrong number. So, is the jet fueled up? Let's go get Kurt and Housh."
Roger Goodell calls Dan Snyder to discuss the salary cap
[start recording]
RG: ::dials 1-703-555-CASH::
DS's secretary: "Thank you for calling Commanders Park, Mr. Goodell. Mr. Snyder will be with you in a few moments."
::2 minutes later::
DS: "Roger! How are you? How are things in New York? Always great to talk to you!"
RG: “Mr. Snyder, this is commissioner Goodell calling. We’d like to talk to you about the salary cap.”
DS: "Say... that sure was a pretty fancy necktie you had at the last league meeting... give you two 1st round picks for it?"
RG: "Mr. Snyder, I'm the commissioner... can't use draft picks..."
DS: "Fine. Three 1st round picks, but no higher!"
RG: "Mr. Snyder, about the salary ca..."
DS: "FOUR 1st round picks. Final offer."
RG: "NO, Mr. Snyder, you cannot have my tie. Now, about the salary cap?"
DS: “Errrm.... okay. ::sounds nervous:: Ah, yes. The salary cap. Great invention, creates parity throughout the league by preventing rich guys from spending their own money. Okay, so what did you want to talk about?”
RG: “Well… firstly, we’re not sure that your contract with Albert Haynesworth will allow you to stay under the cap…”
DS: “Albert who?”
RG: “Albert Haynesworth?”
DS: “Who?”
RG: “…….."
RG: "Okay, nevermind, we can come back to that. The DeAngelo Hall contract also pushes you over the top.”
DS: “DeAngelo — You mean DeAngelo Williams? He plays for the Panthers. Talk to them. Wait — is he a free agent too??”
RG: “No, DeAngelo Hall, the cornerback you just signe….. know what? Skip it.”
DS: “Alright. I honestly have no idea who you’re talking about.”
RG: “Now, on to your $700 million, 40 year contract to Derrick Dockery. This deal also places you in violation of the salary cap.”
DS: “Well, only $10 million of that is guaranteed, so — errr, I mean… who is Derrick Dockery? I don’t really know what you’re talking about.”
RG: “………..”
DS: "........."
RG: ::click::
VC: "Who was that?"
DS: "Must have had the wrong number. So, is the jet fueled up? Let's go get Kurt and Housh."
