Unusual way to become a single Dad

[Eric_Boyer]

Neither way is fair for the child.

Him meeting a younger woman is a nice thought, .. maybe she has kids this girl's age.

But my wife's cousin still has his Mom, .. and he still is devastated with the loss of his Dad. His Dad was retired and he was an only child so they were together a lot and very close.

I saw the possibility of this coming when he had his vasectomy reversed and they made a testtube baby from his sperm and her egg.

He was in his late 50's.

Many people choose this, it's none of my business. I just would not do it myself.

the child would not have a life if not for the action of the parents. kudos to him for cherishing life and giving her the greatest gift a person can receive.

 

[AbeBeta]

I haven't judged anyone, I haven't said anything harsh, .. although I do have my opinion on the subject.

I have only shared my opinion, .. I have not tried to change anyone else's opinion.

Not sure why some have issues with that.

I see, passing judgment and denying that you are judging! Is that the new "Do not judge..."?

Honestly, I have an issue with it because from about 100 other conversations, I know EXACTLY where you are coming from on this.

 

[WV Cowboy]

I see, passing judgment and denying that you are judging! Is that the new "Do not judge..."?

I don't see where I have judged, but I have stated that I would choose not to do so myself, and gave some of my reasons.
Throughout the thread I have said, ...

1. Many people choose this, it's none of my business. I just would not do it myself.
2. Like I said earlier, people do this, it doesn't impact me, .. but I wouldn't have a child that late in life.
3. Obviously, it is their choice.

I don't see that as judging, but if you do, ... have at it.

 

[BigStar]

I agree with WV, geriatric pregnancies are a fad because people put their own lives ahead of a healthy child. To decide to have a family or to be a parent at that age does look selfish to any outsider. The child most definately will be stigmatized (alot of people are forgetting this point). I am not saying it is fair (it isn't), but there were plenty of times growing up where kids would comment that other kids parents were "grandmas or grandpas". I don't know of the effect this would have on a kid's development, but it does seem like an unfair burden placed on the child. This "burden on the child" ideology is deemed ignorant by most, though it doesn't change the fact of its existence. Most would then like to point to socioeconomic factors that also put children at a disadvantage, but that is not the topic here. It is whether having children at that age is considered selfish or not beneficial to the child, and the physical evidence says there is no denying that.

Though this can also easily lead others to questions any family structure outside of the protoypical wife and husband dynamic. That is the slippery sloap in judging older folks for having children. If you can judge them for putting their children at phyiscal and social risk; then one would really have to look at the high birth rates amongst the poor or socially disadvangted. With divorce rates as high as they are, the wife and husband dynamic is becoming a rarity and seen as a blessing if one is brought up in such ideal circumstances. That is why one must be careful to really judge a person for being selfish for having children in any non ideal circumstance.