What are some funny things you thought as a kid that were wrong?

Reality

Reality

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Today's holiday (Labor Day) always makes me think back to when I was a kid and how I seemed to have my own reasons and logic for several things, and in this case, Labor Day.

I have always been a very literal person, but especially so as a kid. I have also lived my life by logic as much as possible. Unfortunately, that includes my own special version of logic that seems to override general logic (and common sense according to others) at times.

When I was kid, I never heard the word "labor" used for its worker reference. Every single time I heard the word labor, it was only when someone was giving birth. Whether it was on a TV show, in a movie, or about a relative, neighbor, etc., I would always hear things like "They're going to the hospital because she's in labor", "She was in labor for 12 hours", etc.

So, as you can probably figure out, I thought "Labor Day" was a holiday for women who went into labor. I also did not think it was fair mothers got Mothers Day and Labor Day and father's only got one holiday, Fathers Day.

Now, you may think I'm just being funny, but if you knew me, you would know this is definitely the way my mind works.

This is just one of many examples I have from my childhood, and I may post more, but for now, I am curious to hear what funny, weird, wrong, etc. things you thought as a kid growing up?
 
Trouty

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I was terrified of ending up under a freeway overpass.

It's funny (if that's the right word, here) because it would never happen. But it tormented me -- the thought of sleeping and living alone -- homeless, and hapless.

"Terrified" is actually an understatement. I would have nightmares of this scenario. It was so out of the realm and not going to happen, but I used to get depressed at the thought of my future.

Cray-cray
 
haleyrules

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Trouty said:
I was terrified of ending up under a freeway overpass.

It's funny (if that's the right word, here) because it would never happen. But it tormented me -- the thought of sleeping and living alone -- homeless, and hapless.

"Terrified" is actually an understatement. I would have nightmares of this scenario. It was so out of the realm and not going to happen, but I used to get depressed at the thought of my future.

Cray-cray
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What!! Whats wrong with living under a bridge!!
 
Reality

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When I was around 7 years old, we went to visit my Aunt, Uncle and Cousin in San Antonio for a week. Everyone was discussing what we should eat the first night since we arrived around dinner time. My cousin kept saying, "Whataburger!" over and over, which I had never heard of. They decided they would cook that night, but told my cousin we would go to Whataburger tomorrow.

Well, I thought she was saying, "water burger" the whole time, and I'm thinking, I don't want a burger made out of water. A wet bun alone is horrible, so I couldn't imagine what a water burger tasted like. The next morning, I ate as big of a breakfast as I could thinking I was going to skip the nasty water burger and wouldn't eat again until later in the evening. Now, my family did not eat a lot of fast food growing up, so normally I jumped at the chance when it happened, but of course in this case, I said I wasn't hungry so I didn't order anything. When they got back with the food, everyone had hamburgers, french fries, etc. and I got to watch them eat them while I just sat there. Later on, I got to eat a very plain tasting sandwich.
 
Trouty

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Reality said:
When I was around 7 years old, we went to visit my Aunt, Uncle and Cousin in San Antonio for a week. Everyone was discussing what we should eat the first night since we arrived around dinner time. My cousin kept saying, "Whataburger!" over and over, which I had never heard of. They decided they would cook that night, but told my cousin we would go to Whataburger tomorrow.

Well, I thought she was saying, "water burger" the whole time, and I'm thinking, I don't want a burger made out of water. A wet bun alone is horrible, so I couldn't imagine what a water burger tasted like. The next morning, I ate as big of a breakfast as I could thinking I was going to skip the nasty water burger and wouldn't eat again until later in the evening. Now, my family did not eat a lot of fast food growing up, so normally I jumped at the chance when it happened, but of course in this case, I said I wasn't hungry so I didn't order anything. When they got back with the food, everyone had hamburgers, french fries, etc. and I got to watch them eat them while I just sat there. Later on, I got to eat a very plain tasting sandwich.
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This is incredibly funny and sad at the same time, Reality! :)
 
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