I don't think the Cowboys are "soft" at all.
However, that WAS the buzz-word leading up to the Steeler game. It was a big story line leading up to that game. Dallas lost the game, but stayed right with what many consider one of the "toughest" teams in the NFL. So if that matters, that should've settled it.
I think, one of the big problems has to do with a team full of supposed play-makers, individual "stars", etc............I think a lot of guys are just waiting for someone else to make a play. It's certainly possible in a big way that guys are going at 4/5 speed or taking plays off, thinking "no problem, the other guy will do something big". If that's the case, it could be interpreted that the team is "soft", but in reality it's too many guys relying on the "other" Pro Bowler to come through.
You don't have this problem on a team like Atlanta or Miami or Arizona. Teams with a vast majority of guys looking to prove something, not only for the team but for their own free-agency agenda. Everyone plays "hard" and full speed on every play because their individually and collectively hungry and determined.
That's my interpretation on the whole "soft" thing. Too many Cowboys relying on some other "super star" to make a play..................