Yo mamma thread

[Reverend Conehead]

Post your favorite "yo mamma" joke in this thread. Keep it clean, please. Also, first a disclaimer:

Before we begin, we want to make it perfectly clear that we have nothing against your mother. We've never met the woman, but she sounds like an upstanding person and a nurturing, wonderful parent. All of the jokes you're about to read are most definitely not about your beloved mom, who is beyond reproach and the best human being who ever existed. To be honest, we're not even sure why we're publishing all of these yo mama jokes. If you ask us, they're kind of old, cheap, and overused. ​

​

I didn't write the disclaimer myself. I quoted it from some site named "Best Life" because I couldn't have said it better. And, finally, my favorite yo mamma joke:

Yo mamma's so fat, when she goes camping their bears hide their food.

 

[VaqueroTD]

Yo mama so fat her blood type is rocky road!

Yo mama so fat her belt size is equator!

Stolen from Eddie Murphy and Dave Chapelle going at each other with yo mama jokes In Nutty Professor. Great scene!

Another one can’t post though or get banned.

 

[The Fonz]

Yo mama’s so old she knew burger king when he was still a prince

 

[The Fonz]

Yo mama’s so old when she was young she was a cheerleader for the Dallas Cowboys the last time they won a SB​

 

[Reverend Conehead]

Yo mama’s so old when she was young she was a cheerleader for the Dallas Cowboys the last time they won a SB​

I think Abraham Lincoln attended the game the last time the Cowboys won the Super Bowl.

 

[Runwildboys]

I think Abraham Lincoln attended the game the last time the Cowboys won the Super Bowl.

Back before Jerry changed his name from John Wilkes Booth.

 

[nightrain]

Yo Mama is so fat that when she was in school she sat next to everybody.

 

[LonnieElam]

 

[nobody]

Yo mamma is so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.

Yo mamma is so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."

Yo mamma is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama has more tartar in her mouth than Red Lobster

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama so fat that she can't wear shirts with sports logos because helicopters keep trying to land on her.

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama is so poor when she and your family go to the park ,the ducks throw bread at you.

 

[Hardline]

Your mamma so fat, Her *** has it's own congressman.

 

[Roadtrip635]

Yo mamma so slow it took her 3 hours to watch "60 Minutes"


Yo mamma so dumb she went to the dentist to get bluetooth.

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama is so scary ,when she enters a room and turns the lights on ,the mice jump up onto the chair .

 

[Roadtrip635]

Yo Mamma teeth so yellow, when she smiles, traffic slows down

 

[SMASHMOUTH9473]

Yo momma is so fat, she can sit on a quarter and squeeze a booger out of George Washington's nose !

 

[Roadtrip635]

Does anyone else wonder if Yo-Yo Ma tells Yo Mama jokes?

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama so stupid, she was filling out a job application and it said " Sign Here" and she put " Sagittarius ".

 

[timb2]

Ya Mama so ugly that even Ted Dansen wouldn't date her.