I can't stand dreaming I am awake then I wake up and can't get back to sleep to dream I am asleep. Those that think I am actually asleep when I am awake might be onto something. My wife said I am a dreamer and I said "sure I am, but asleep or awake"? She said "does it really matter"?
Ya know those stories about out of body experiences people tell? Like they're hovering above themselves during a surgery and aware of what's going on? I'd like to hover above myself just once while I am sleeping to make sure that I am. I don't know for sure that I've ever been asleep. Damn dreams could just be figments while I am standing in the corner with a broom and a hammer watching the closet door.
And just what the hell are 40 winks? Who stayed up to watch and decided that was the magic number? If you snuck into someone's bedroom to steal their jewelry, shined the flashlight over and they were winking at you, would you hang around to count? I'd assume they were expecting me and not on number 24 and get the hell out.
And what diabolical mind thought up counting sheep? Have you ever seen a flock of sheep? They move around, they don't stand still so you can count them. And what's with this shepherd nonsense? Sheep are not a herd, they're a flock, why aren't they called shepflocks?
It's just these kind of thoughts that keep me up at night, a flock of thoughts.....that I just can't herd.