If you are married....

Avaj

Peace Be Still
Messages
1,700
Reaction score
1
If you are married or been in a long relationship how long did it take you to say this is the one for me? Meaning I'm going to marry this person or commit to this person and no one else.

As some of us like to say, when did you decide to turn in your player's card :D

Did you know right away, months, years???
 

CowboyWay

If Coach would have put me in, we'd a won State
Messages
4,445
Reaction score
554
Leap of faith brother.

Find someone who you don't fight with. Someone who has alot of the same interests. Someone who isn't high strung.

Marriage is a long slide down a hill. You want to do it with someone who can whether the bumps and not go bat **** crazy at the drop of a hat.
 

ArmyCowboy

New Member
Messages
951
Reaction score
0
Avaj;2845590 said:
Can I get a serious response

You know, I've been married twice and I can't really answer that truthfully, since I don't really think there was a moment.

However, I will say this. If you are getting married, make sure of two things:

1) You share common interests. You don't have to like everything the other person likes, but it's good to have several things that you both like to do together.

2) Make sure she's not the jealous/possesive type. That will screw up a relationship in a hurry and you'll be a position of having to prove yourself innocent all the time.
 

theogt

Surrealist
Messages
45,846
Reaction score
5,912
I was dating someone else when I met my current wife. I knew almost immediately after meeting her, she was probably 'the one'. I broke off the other relationship and the rest is history.
 

Maikeru-sama

Mick Green 58
Messages
14,548
Reaction score
6
CowboyWay;2845595 said:
Leap of faith brother.

Find someone who you don't fight with. Someone who has alot of the same interests. Someone who isn't high strung.

Marriage is a long slide down a hill. You want to do it with someone who can whether the bumps and not go bat **** crazy at the drop of a hat.

CW, are you speaking from experience :p: .
 

ABQCOWBOY

Regular Joe....
Messages
58,929
Reaction score
27,716
Avaj,

I don't know that there is a time frame you can go by. For example, with my X wife, I knew her from the time I was about 13 till the time we got married, which was about 24. It didn't work out. With my Wife, we dated for a good 3 years and there are times that I still don't know. I'm certain that there are times when she thinks the same. Sometimes I think it's more about you then it is about time. If you are at a point in your life where your ready to deal with all that goes with being married and starting a family, then maybe your at the right time in your life. It's not easy and you will tell yourself that you have made the wrong choice time and again but I do believe it's worth it if you both have what it takes to make a happy family.

It never hurts to wait if your not sure because it's HARD work. Better to be sure then make a mistake. Stats say that 50% fail if you do it before your 25. They also say that 50% fail if there are more then 9 years between you. I say that if you believe your at that point in your life, you'll never actually know until you've made the decision.

I guess what I'm saying is that I don't know crap. :laugh2:

Talk to your parents and see what they say. They are usually smarter then you think.

:)
 

theogt

Surrealist
Messages
45,846
Reaction score
5,912
CowboyWay;2845595 said:
Leap of faith brother.

Find someone who you don't fight with.
Someone who has alot of the same interests. Someone who isn't high strung.

Marriage is a long slide down a hill. You want to do it with someone who can whether the bumps and not go bat **** crazy at the drop of a hat.
This is great advice. If she's a *****, get rid of her. It doesn't matter if she's hot. Looks fade.
 

TellerMorrow34

BraveHeartFan
Messages
28,358
Reaction score
5,076
I knew within a few months that she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
 

Bob Sacamano

Benched
Messages
57,084
Reaction score
3
theogt;2845615 said:
I was dating someone else when I met my current 'wife'. I knew almost immediately after meeting 'her', 'she' was probably 'the one'. I broke off the other relationship and the rest is history.

and then you went to Cali in order to get married
 

Chief

"Friggin Joke Monkey"
Messages
8,543
Reaction score
4
I was with my ex-wife for 22 years. We had to really work at it to make it last that long ... seems like it was never easy. I married her, like someone else posted, because I "knocked her up." I believed marrying her was the right thing to do and we lasted a long time.

Eventually, some of her habits/personality made it impossible to carry on.

My current (and last) wife is amazing. She's my best friend and someone I trust completely. She's also hot (ask Hos :) )

What I've learned is it's important to be with someone who has your best interests at heart, who has your back, who loves being your partner. That means everything. I didn't have that the first time.

My wife watches the Cowboys with me. If it's something I like and something that's important to me, then she's all for it. I do the same for her. I do things with her that I know are important to her.

Anyway, just find somebody that you trust completely and will always have your back.
 

ethiostar

Well-Known Member
Messages
6,309
Reaction score
46
I would like to say that the first time i saw my wife i thought she was the one but the reality is i didn't know her. I thought she was absolutly beautiful but that doesn't neccessarily make her the one. There wasn't a particular moment when i said this is it, i think it gradually happened.

When i met her, i had gotten out of a really really bad relationship and i had trust issues, so i was very skeptical and cautious in the begining and i told her as much. I do remember a time when she said "don't worry, i have enough faith for the both of us". I think that was a powerful and turning moment in our relationship.

We do come from very different backgrounds but we share a lot of the same values and interests. Relationships take a lot of work, don't let anyone else tell you different.

We've been together for 9 years, been married for 3. The one thing i can tell you is that make sure you 'like' her and the kind of person she is. I don't mean 'love', which i don't think you have much control over. You can fall in love with the wrong type of person, someone that's not good for you. I mean LIKE, someone who can be a good friend, someone you admire thier intelect and temperment. Someone who is committed, caring and isn't too self-centered.

With all that said, expect up and downs in your relationship. What matters is how you handle them together.
 

Bob Sacamano

Benched
Messages
57,084
Reaction score
3
and whatever you do, don't fall in love with the woman who takes your virginity

that's what happened to Yeag, and he's miserable
 

Chief

"Friggin Joke Monkey"
Messages
8,543
Reaction score
4
ethiostar;2845663 said:
The one thing i can tell you is that make sure you 'like' her and the kind of person she is. I don't mean 'love', which i don't think you have much control over. You can fall in love with the wrong type of person, someone that's not good for you. I mean LIKE, someone who can be a good friend, someone you admire thier intelect and temperment. Someone who is committed, caring and isn't too self-centered.

That's good advice.
 
Top