Yeagermeister
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Bob Sacamano;2845666 said:
At least mine was with a woman not a sheep
If you are married....
- Thread starter Avaj
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At least mine was with a woman not a sheep
ethiostar
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One more thing Avaj,
You will not find someone that is flawless, someone who has nothing but positive traits. Chances are there will be things/habbits that annoy you, things that you wish you can change in the person. And who knows that person might change in the future to your liking but what if they don't. Can you see yourself living with it in the long-run? If you can't, no need to bother.
You will not find someone that is flawless, someone who has nothing but positive traits. Chances are there will be things/habbits that annoy you, things that you wish you can change in the person. And who knows that person might change in the future to your liking but what if they don't. Can you see yourself living with it in the long-run? If you can't, no need to bother.
YosemiteSam
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First off. If you feel you can't live without her? It's a mistake to get married right now. That is obsession and that will cause more harm in a marriage than good. (or being generally possessive is a major downer)
Do your views of other people match? For instance, if you are opening minded for the most part about people in general, but she (or you) have an elitist or racial outlook. If one of you tend to look down on others and the other does not, you're crossing a character boundry and that generally will draw negative feelings about each others actions. (both ways, not just not liking someone talking about about someone else)
Do you keep house the same way? In otherwords, if your house full of clutter and her house is not? (or other way around) That doesn't go over well in marriage.
Are you willing to pay me a fee for not disrupting your lives? (this always helps)
Do your views of other people match? For instance, if you are opening minded for the most part about people in general, but she (or you) have an elitist or racial outlook. If one of you tend to look down on others and the other does not, you're crossing a character boundry and that generally will draw negative feelings about each others actions. (both ways, not just not liking someone talking about about someone else)
Do you keep house the same way? In otherwords, if your house full of clutter and her house is not? (or other way around) That doesn't go over well in marriage.
Are you willing to pay me a fee for not disrupting your lives? (this always helps)
YosemiteSam
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ethiostar;2845693 said:
http://i59.***BLOCKED***/albums/g303/dudeitsme_2006/thsexysheep.jpg
Yeagermeister
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nyc;2845698 said:
Careful or you'll get Swabbie all hot and bothered
Chief
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nyc;2845692 said:
This reminded me of the importance of certain issues that can make or break a marriage.
You have to be in agreement on certain key things.
Do you both want kids or not?
If you do, how will you raise/discipline them?
Are your spiritual/religious beliefs compatible?
Can you deal with each other's in-laws?
And like nyc said, how do you keep your house (clutter, etc.)?
Bob Sacamano
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theogt;2845706 said:
I don't have to dignify that with a response
good day
JohnnyHopkins
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It took maybe one month. When I first met my wife, we fought like cats and dogs. It very quickly turned into a relationship that lasted for fifteen completely faithful years running. I have never looked back at my marriage as anything other than a blessing.
JohnnyHopkins
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Chief;2845704 said:
One more is Finances. If one is conservative and the other is a Free-spender, it can wear down a marriage very quick.
lewpac
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The first time I saw my wife, I would've married her on sight, THAT DAY!!
Because even if we got divorced a week later, I would've had the pictures to prove "LOOK WHAT I MARRIED" at least once in my life!!!
That's shallow, but the God's honest truth.
One of the basic tenants as to WHEN to pull the trigger is as follows........
You marry a person when you know that, IF THEY NEVER CHANGE ONE BIT, you could live with THAT PERSON the rest of your life.
To often, people marry someone with the expectations and a program for them to change for the better as time goes on. In other words, their not fully sold on the product, but they get married anyway because SOME DAY, he/she will mature into what they really want them to be. DON'T DO THAT! Not to yourself and certainly not to the other person. It is patently unfair and maybe even underhanded to marry someone, only to THEN have a list of things you want them to BECOME.
Honestly, women do this to men a lot more than men do this to women. Men are simple creatures when it comes to marriage. They're just tickled to death to have the little lady at home and to be with someone who puts up with us. When this problem occurs, it's usually the gal. They marry the guy even though he still has a few rough edges she doesn't like (as all men do), and then set about on a program to make him into the Ken Doll that she REALLY wants. I've seen this a hundred times. You've never seen a guy who's constantly harping on his woman to change this or change that, stop this or stop that, picking her apart all the time for every little imperfection. This is territory staked out by the wives only.
Men can bring a lot of problems into a marriage, but this isn't one of them.
The thing to remember in any good relationship or marriage, or about deciding WHEN to pull the trigger is the Big Three: Sex, Finances and Communication.
This is not an opinion or personal experience. This is true in EVERY case. All three have to be in really great shape or your going to have a problem. If you have good sex and can talk, but have no money, it's gonna' put pressure on the deal. If you got money and have good sex, but can't talk to one another in a respectful and mature way, your crusin' for a brusin'. If you can talk and you got your finances right, but not going about the bedroom-business, it's gonna' lead to trouble. Sex, Finances and Communication.......if you got that going good, it's a pretty good barometer that she's the gal for you.
Finally, getting married will only intensify what your already in. In other words, if things are good between you two, marriage will make it better. If your prone to bickering and arguing or in a power-struggle with your mate, getting married will make it ten times worse than it is now. The reason for this is, before your married, your not "stuck". If there is "the real thing" going on between you two, then getting married will only improve all that love and sweetness and caring. The legal and binding commitment of a marraige will make a good thing even better. It finalizes (supposedly) all that good stuff between you and settles the issue. If things aren't right between you, and you walk down the alter and put the rings on, the usual first thought is "why the hell did I just do that?" Now, when the usual argument or fighting begins, you just can't pack a bag and dig-out. Now, it's a longer and drawn out program to dismiss yourself from an unpleasant relationship. Getting married will further propogate and pour gasoline on to whatever the existing fire is.
Because even if we got divorced a week later, I would've had the pictures to prove "LOOK WHAT I MARRIED" at least once in my life!!!
That's shallow, but the God's honest truth.
One of the basic tenants as to WHEN to pull the trigger is as follows........
You marry a person when you know that, IF THEY NEVER CHANGE ONE BIT, you could live with THAT PERSON the rest of your life.
To often, people marry someone with the expectations and a program for them to change for the better as time goes on. In other words, their not fully sold on the product, but they get married anyway because SOME DAY, he/she will mature into what they really want them to be. DON'T DO THAT! Not to yourself and certainly not to the other person. It is patently unfair and maybe even underhanded to marry someone, only to THEN have a list of things you want them to BECOME.
Honestly, women do this to men a lot more than men do this to women. Men are simple creatures when it comes to marriage. They're just tickled to death to have the little lady at home and to be with someone who puts up with us. When this problem occurs, it's usually the gal. They marry the guy even though he still has a few rough edges she doesn't like (as all men do), and then set about on a program to make him into the Ken Doll that she REALLY wants. I've seen this a hundred times. You've never seen a guy who's constantly harping on his woman to change this or change that, stop this or stop that, picking her apart all the time for every little imperfection. This is territory staked out by the wives only.
Men can bring a lot of problems into a marriage, but this isn't one of them.
The thing to remember in any good relationship or marriage, or about deciding WHEN to pull the trigger is the Big Three: Sex, Finances and Communication.
This is not an opinion or personal experience. This is true in EVERY case. All three have to be in really great shape or your going to have a problem. If you have good sex and can talk, but have no money, it's gonna' put pressure on the deal. If you got money and have good sex, but can't talk to one another in a respectful and mature way, your crusin' for a brusin'. If you can talk and you got your finances right, but not going about the bedroom-business, it's gonna' lead to trouble. Sex, Finances and Communication.......if you got that going good, it's a pretty good barometer that she's the gal for you.
Finally, getting married will only intensify what your already in. In other words, if things are good between you two, marriage will make it better. If your prone to bickering and arguing or in a power-struggle with your mate, getting married will make it ten times worse than it is now. The reason for this is, before your married, your not "stuck". If there is "the real thing" going on between you two, then getting married will only improve all that love and sweetness and caring. The legal and binding commitment of a marraige will make a good thing even better. It finalizes (supposedly) all that good stuff between you and settles the issue. If things aren't right between you, and you walk down the alter and put the rings on, the usual first thought is "why the hell did I just do that?" Now, when the usual argument or fighting begins, you just can't pack a bag and dig-out. Now, it's a longer and drawn out program to dismiss yourself from an unpleasant relationship. Getting married will further propogate and pour gasoline on to whatever the existing fire is.
Hostile
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I saw my wife at a dance and knew I was going to marry her. I even told my Mom that the next day. A week later I asked her out and 5 weeks after that we were engaged. We got married 2 and a half months after that and in December it will be 19 years.Avaj;2845577 said:If you are married or been in a long relationship how long did it take you to say this is the one for me? Meaning I'm going to marry this person or commit to this person and no one else.
As some of us like to say, when did you decide to turn in your player's card
Did you know right away, months, years???
There's no clock on love. You know when it happens to you.
Bob Sacamano
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Hostile;2845760 said:
dude, that has to be the quickest to a marriage proposal this side of Las Vegas
Hostile
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Not even close. I have a friend that was in line on a Friday to get tickets to a Saturday college football game. He started flirting with the girl in line behind him. They ended up going to the game together. Went to Church together the next day and then dinner at her apartment that night. He proposed to her after dinner. They got married 2 weeks later and have been married 24 years now.Bob Sacamano;2845763 said:
I am not kididng.