Okay, you got me. Because I mocked Tom Brady, that really means I spend every waking hour of every day obsessing over him. Write a short little satiric jab, and it can't just be a short, satiric jab. There MUST be something deeper going on, and you've uncovered it. I actually obsess over Tom Brady day after day and tape his picture to a dart board and to a sex doll and then yell at him and cry hysterically. Yup, that's what's going on. I didn't just feel a twinge of annoyance at him for his quote and then just mock him for the fun of it. That couldn't possibly be the case. I'm actually obsessed so much that I did the incredibly hard work of writing one mocking sentence. Sorry, I should not have done that. No one should ever satirize anything. Now I'll get to the 30,000 word deadly serious manifesto against Tom Brady that I should have been working on.