Bud light presents...
(Real men of Genius)
Today we salute you, Mr Blunt, in your face, not going to change, sports reporter columnist guy.
(Mr Blunt, in your face sports reporter columnist guy)
Cloaked in opinions portrayed as the truth, you boldly stand guard like a statue of freedom that does not sway with the wind.
(You are hard like a Marble statue)
You proudly proclaim for the complainers not to complain about your complaints of the team.
(Tough guys should not sound like victims)
So crack open an Ice Cold Bud Light you Vanguard of the Verbiage against the Virulent Vermin Viewership and their Vexation of your Vestal Volition even when you play the Victim.
(Virgin is another word that starts with V)
(Real men of Genius)