JethroPugh
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"No question!"
My all-time most hated football cliche/terms/sayings
- Thread starter GimmeTheBall!
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DWhite Fan
It ain't over 'til it's over
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"False Start. Offense #76."
We get to here this one time every week
We get to here this one time every week
JordanTaber
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How about internet fanboy football terms?
"Speed Burner"
It's just such a nauseating, sickening, BS term. "SPEEEEEEEEEEEED BURRRNERRRRR." "SPEEEEEEEEEEEED BURNER." "SPEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed BURNER!!!!!!"
:throwup:
What the f--- is a SPEED BURNER? If you call someone a "burner" that MEANS that they are fast. That's what "BURNER" means. If you say "this guy isn't a burner," it means he doesn't have great speed. So then what the f--- is a "SPEED" BURNER? Someone who BURNS SPEED? How the f--- do you BURN speed? When you BURN someone, it means (at least in a football sense) that you beat them with SPEED. You might as well say "burner burner."
It's bad enough that it's a completely absurd, redundant term, but to make matters 1,000 times worse, it's nauseating beyond belief. It makes you sound like a little dweeb when you say it. SPEEEEEEEEEED BURNER.
Anyone who says "speed burner" automatically loses 40 IQ points. It's that juvenile. 80 points if they say "we need a SPEEEEEEEEEEED burner to COMPLIMENT Terrell Owens!!!"
"Skill set"
This is football's equivalent to "God" in everyday life. It's a catchall for things that can not be explained by stupid individuals; rather than actually take the time to think about things logically, people would prefer to move on with their lives and pretend that everything has a simple and fair reason for happening. So when a receiver who does absolutely nothing impressive like Darrell Jackson posts 80 catch, 1100 yard, 10 touchdown seasons, he's not a "product of a system," he just "has the SKILL SET needed to succeed in that system/offense!!!"
It's just amazing how stupid this is. I mean, you could converse with a moron and get them to admit that Darrell Jackson has terrible hands, mediocre speed, runs average routes, is nothing special after the catch, and doesn't do anything special to win jump balls or shield defenders from the ball, yet at the end of the conversation, that same moron will go "but he has the SKILL SET to be successful in the Mike Holmgren system!"
In other words, apparently a receiver with absolutely no SKILLS somehow has the SKILL SET to be successful in that system. Here are some of these possible "skills":
*He breathes air and drinks water. This is important, as it allows a human being to continue to inhabit this planet. If he didn't do this, he would die, and then he wouldn't be able to be successful in the Mike Holmgren offense.
*He has two hands. It's hard to catch the ball playing catch with your dad in the back yard with one brick hand, but with two brick hands, your chances at least double.
*He doesn't have any serious physical disorders like MS, at least that we know about. This allows him to not injure himself when running out of bounds or jogging into the flat after coming out of a 3 point stance in the backfield.
*He knows how to put on a helmet. This is very important--it allowed Matt Hasselbeck to see what team he played for in case he went colorblind and couldn't figure out who was wearing "sewage green" as opposed to a non-nauseating color opponent.
“Dropsies”
What are you, in 2nd grade? DROPSIES? Oooooh, clever. When I read this from some little twit on the internet, I immediately think of eye drops, mucus bubbles, or cough syrup. Gross. Oh...or maybe the word "oopsies."
"He has a case of the dropSIES." Here comes the football....OOPSIES, he DROPSIED the ball!!! Even though it was 5 yards behind him and he only got 1/10th of a fingernail on it, it's a dropsy. NFL DROPSIES LEADERS:
1. Terrell Owens-59843989834
2. Darrell Jackson-311
196. Randy Moss-Negative 4. When he gets both hands, both feet, and his teeth on the ball, it's NOT a dropsy; Randy Moss doesn't dropsy balls...the relative humidity was too high, causing the angle of entry to be .0034 degrees off the proper trajectory, and this combined with the sun being partially blocked by cumulonimbus clouds led to the inability of the quarterback to hook up with Mr. Moss on the play in question.
"Class Act"
Now, this is a term that COULD be used correctly...if anyone had any idea what the hell they were talking about. But the reality is, we really don't...and it's basically not even feasible to know enough about a player personally to use the term in an informed manner.
So instead, the result is "Marvin Harrison is a CLASS ACT." (*choke* *shoot*) "Ahman Green is such a classy guy, listen to how mild-mannered a black man he is!!!" ("Shut up b----, next time I tell you to clean the living room you'll do it!!!") "Jerry Rice is a CLASS ACT." ("No, I don't have a wife or kids at all...your place at 2 a.m.?")
People throw this term around with confidence and authority and it makes me want to strangle kittens. They want to add something else to the sport...it's not enough to talk about what kind of player the guy is...they have to judge what kind of man he is by what he sounds like in his press conferences…the sound of his voice, the softness of his facial features, and the BS United Way commercials that he does. There's Tony Gonzalez in a soup kitchen--awwwww, it makes me feewwwwl so warm and fuzzy inside. He's a nice, squishy, generous, kind, caring person. He would NEEEEVER go to a strip club and grope a stripper, then get charged with sexual assault...he's exactly the million dollar smile athlete I want my kids looking up to!
"Look at how mild-mannered and calm Warren Moon is in that interview. And his eyes get big and bulgy every now and then when he's talking passionately about his NFL career. What CLAAAAAAAAAAASSssssss (said with the sound of someone entering a nice, hot bath). Wife beating and drunk driving aside, he's a GREAT human being. I hear he donates $10,000 per year to soup kitchens across America. Sure, that's not even a scratch on the surface for a man with a net worth in the double digit millions, but even though he's dining on gourmet foods in his 50,000 square foot mansion while people in 3rd world countries are munching on a blow torched field rat, he is a GENEROUS man. Plus, he looks good in a suit.
Just the epitome of CLASS.
"Speed Burner"
It's just such a nauseating, sickening, BS term. "SPEEEEEEEEEEEED BURRRNERRRRR." "SPEEEEEEEEEEEED BURNER." "SPEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed BURNER!!!!!!"
:throwup:
What the f--- is a SPEED BURNER? If you call someone a "burner" that MEANS that they are fast. That's what "BURNER" means. If you say "this guy isn't a burner," it means he doesn't have great speed. So then what the f--- is a "SPEED" BURNER? Someone who BURNS SPEED? How the f--- do you BURN speed? When you BURN someone, it means (at least in a football sense) that you beat them with SPEED. You might as well say "burner burner."
It's bad enough that it's a completely absurd, redundant term, but to make matters 1,000 times worse, it's nauseating beyond belief. It makes you sound like a little dweeb when you say it. SPEEEEEEEEEED BURNER.
Anyone who says "speed burner" automatically loses 40 IQ points. It's that juvenile. 80 points if they say "we need a SPEEEEEEEEEEED burner to COMPLIMENT Terrell Owens!!!"
"Skill set"
This is football's equivalent to "God" in everyday life. It's a catchall for things that can not be explained by stupid individuals; rather than actually take the time to think about things logically, people would prefer to move on with their lives and pretend that everything has a simple and fair reason for happening. So when a receiver who does absolutely nothing impressive like Darrell Jackson posts 80 catch, 1100 yard, 10 touchdown seasons, he's not a "product of a system," he just "has the SKILL SET needed to succeed in that system/offense!!!"
It's just amazing how stupid this is. I mean, you could converse with a moron and get them to admit that Darrell Jackson has terrible hands, mediocre speed, runs average routes, is nothing special after the catch, and doesn't do anything special to win jump balls or shield defenders from the ball, yet at the end of the conversation, that same moron will go "but he has the SKILL SET to be successful in the Mike Holmgren system!"
In other words, apparently a receiver with absolutely no SKILLS somehow has the SKILL SET to be successful in that system. Here are some of these possible "skills":
*He breathes air and drinks water. This is important, as it allows a human being to continue to inhabit this planet. If he didn't do this, he would die, and then he wouldn't be able to be successful in the Mike Holmgren offense.
*He has two hands. It's hard to catch the ball playing catch with your dad in the back yard with one brick hand, but with two brick hands, your chances at least double.
*He doesn't have any serious physical disorders like MS, at least that we know about. This allows him to not injure himself when running out of bounds or jogging into the flat after coming out of a 3 point stance in the backfield.
*He knows how to put on a helmet. This is very important--it allowed Matt Hasselbeck to see what team he played for in case he went colorblind and couldn't figure out who was wearing "sewage green" as opposed to a non-nauseating color opponent.
“Dropsies”
What are you, in 2nd grade? DROPSIES? Oooooh, clever. When I read this from some little twit on the internet, I immediately think of eye drops, mucus bubbles, or cough syrup. Gross. Oh...or maybe the word "oopsies."
"He has a case of the dropSIES." Here comes the football....OOPSIES, he DROPSIED the ball!!! Even though it was 5 yards behind him and he only got 1/10th of a fingernail on it, it's a dropsy. NFL DROPSIES LEADERS:
1. Terrell Owens-59843989834
2. Darrell Jackson-311
196. Randy Moss-Negative 4. When he gets both hands, both feet, and his teeth on the ball, it's NOT a dropsy; Randy Moss doesn't dropsy balls...the relative humidity was too high, causing the angle of entry to be .0034 degrees off the proper trajectory, and this combined with the sun being partially blocked by cumulonimbus clouds led to the inability of the quarterback to hook up with Mr. Moss on the play in question.
"Class Act"
Now, this is a term that COULD be used correctly...if anyone had any idea what the hell they were talking about. But the reality is, we really don't...and it's basically not even feasible to know enough about a player personally to use the term in an informed manner.
So instead, the result is "Marvin Harrison is a CLASS ACT." (*choke* *shoot*) "Ahman Green is such a classy guy, listen to how mild-mannered a black man he is!!!" ("Shut up b----, next time I tell you to clean the living room you'll do it!!!") "Jerry Rice is a CLASS ACT." ("No, I don't have a wife or kids at all...your place at 2 a.m.?")
People throw this term around with confidence and authority and it makes me want to strangle kittens. They want to add something else to the sport...it's not enough to talk about what kind of player the guy is...they have to judge what kind of man he is by what he sounds like in his press conferences…the sound of his voice, the softness of his facial features, and the BS United Way commercials that he does. There's Tony Gonzalez in a soup kitchen--awwwww, it makes me feewwwwl so warm and fuzzy inside. He's a nice, squishy, generous, kind, caring person. He would NEEEEVER go to a strip club and grope a stripper, then get charged with sexual assault...he's exactly the million dollar smile athlete I want my kids looking up to!
"Look at how mild-mannered and calm Warren Moon is in that interview. And his eyes get big and bulgy every now and then when he's talking passionately about his NFL career. What CLAAAAAAAAAAASSssssss (said with the sound of someone entering a nice, hot bath). Wife beating and drunk driving aside, he's a GREAT human being. I hear he donates $10,000 per year to soup kitchens across America. Sure, that's not even a scratch on the surface for a man with a net worth in the double digit millions, but even though he's dining on gourmet foods in his 50,000 square foot mansion while people in 3rd world countries are munching on a blow torched field rat, he is a GENEROUS man. Plus, he looks good in a suit.
Just the epitome of CLASS.
GimmeTheBall!
Junior College Transfer
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It all comes down to this . . . .
Rudy
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Pluralizing players name
"When you have the Demarcus Ware's, the Michael Strahan's, and the Reggie White's of the league..."
or when they put an "A" in front of their names...
"Life can be simpler with A Tony Romo or A Brett Favre"
Drives me nuts!
or the phrase, which all of a sudden is in EVERY DC.com article "all but over" or "all but finished." Enough with the "all but's!"
"When you have the Demarcus Ware's, the Michael Strahan's, and the Reggie White's of the league..."
or when they put an "A" in front of their names...
"Life can be simpler with A Tony Romo or A Brett Favre"
Drives me nuts!
or the phrase, which all of a sudden is in EVERY DC.com article "all but over" or "all but finished." Enough with the "all but's!"
RoadRunner
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I can't stand the people who hold up a cardboard capital D, and a carboard section of picket fence. Its tired, worn out, and needed to die in the 1980s.
Every time I see that I clap along in my head only instead of chanting "Defense" I chant "Cli-che".
Every time I see that I clap along in my head only instead of chanting "Defense" I chant "Cli-che".
Biggems
White and Nerdy
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i didnt read the whole thread so forgive me if i repeated any....
Madden "If I could have any to play(position he is discussing), (insert name of player in the game he is calling), is the guy I would have. You just can't get any better than him"
I still remember him doing this like 4 straight weeks....Young, Aikman, Favre, Cunningham....he still does it and it always annoys me.
You play to win the game........DUH
Here comes the most important play of the game....(i guess the other 80 plays were basically meaningless)
There is no sense of urgency
Stupid reporter questions
How do you feel about today's loss?
What exactly, can you attribute to all of the penalties?
Was this a must win game?
Why did you have so much difficulty running the ball today?
Madden "If I could have any to play(position he is discussing), (insert name of player in the game he is calling), is the guy I would have. You just can't get any better than him"
I still remember him doing this like 4 straight weeks....Young, Aikman, Favre, Cunningham....he still does it and it always annoys me.
You play to win the game........DUH
Here comes the most important play of the game....(i guess the other 80 plays were basically meaningless)
There is no sense of urgency
Stupid reporter questions
How do you feel about today's loss?
What exactly, can you attribute to all of the penalties?
Was this a must win game?
Why did you have so much difficulty running the ball today?
LonghornDub
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"He went up and caught the ball at its highest point."
Um, no, he didn't. The ball's highest point was at the apex of its arc, before gravity started to pull it down, which was anywhere from 6 to 50 feet in the air (depending on the throw).
You show me a receiver who can actually catch a fade "at its highest point," and I'll show you the most unstoppable force in the history of the NFL.
Um, no, he didn't. The ball's highest point was at the apex of its arc, before gravity started to pull it down, which was anywhere from 6 to 50 feet in the air (depending on the throw).
You show me a receiver who can actually catch a fade "at its highest point," and I'll show you the most unstoppable force in the history of the NFL.
JordanTaber
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Oh, I forgot...NFL scouts (and Mike Ditka) going "the KID in *blank*" or "this kid" or "the guy in *blank"...like you don't know the guy's *** last name.
They could be talking about Tony Romo and they'd go "the kid in Dallas is a good quarterback. He can run and throw." For whatever reason, this is what the "smart scouts who know what they're talking about" say. If you acknowledge the player's name, your credibility as a scout is GONE. You're not a REEEEAL scout. REEEEAL scouts answer questions like:
"So do you think Mike Alstott should've made the Pro Bowl?"
with
"Well, you want your fullback to be a lead guy, but other than the guy in Atlanta and the guy in Green Bay, there aren't any premier lead guys in the league."
They could be talking about Tony Romo and they'd go "the kid in Dallas is a good quarterback. He can run and throw." For whatever reason, this is what the "smart scouts who know what they're talking about" say. If you acknowledge the player's name, your credibility as a scout is GONE. You're not a REEEEAL scout. REEEEAL scouts answer questions like:
"So do you think Mike Alstott should've made the Pro Bowl?"
with
"Well, you want your fullback to be a lead guy, but other than the guy in Atlanta and the guy in Green Bay, there aren't any premier lead guys in the league."
TellerMorrow34
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LonghornDub;2413987 said:
LOL! That's actually the best one yet.
Romo2Dez4six
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mine is when they say " they must score or put points on the board here."
isn't it a must to put points on the board everytime you have the ball
isn't it a must to put points on the board everytime you have the ball
Chief
"Friggin Joke Monkey"
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Spectre;2414253 said:
I get tired of hearing that, too. :laugh2:
Seriously, a "stud" is a male animal (primarily a horse) used specifically for breeding.
Madden: "If I was going to start a herd of football players, I would have Brett Favre do the breeding."
Soon, these announcers will be talking about how well hung the players are. Too bad Charles Haley isn't still playing.
percyhoward
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The biggest cliche to me is the "Prime Time" celebration.
percyhoward
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Great one. Never thought about it like that before.kmd24;2413240 said:
percyhoward
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It's not a cliche--yet. But since when did the QB spiking the ball to stop the clock become "clocking" the ball?
"They'll have to hurry to get to the line, and then he'll clock it."
"They'll have to hurry to get to the line, and then he'll clock it."
Yakuza Rich
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Particularly when coaches drool when saying it...."he's a Quarterback with a linebacker's mentality."
Just give me a QB with a QB mentality who plays the position well. It sure worked for those guys like Montana, Staubach, Tarkenton, etc.
Or when it comes to Favre....."there's Brett just having fun out there."
Yeah, because when it comes to the NFL, Brett Favre is the only player having fun out there. And of course, it's alright he just threw that ball into triple coverage because that's the expense that comes with him having fun out there.
YAKUZA
Just give me a QB with a QB mentality who plays the position well. It sure worked for those guys like Montana, Staubach, Tarkenton, etc.
Or when it comes to Favre....."there's Brett just having fun out there."
Yeah, because when it comes to the NFL, Brett Favre is the only player having fun out there. And of course, it's alright he just threw that ball into triple coverage because that's the expense that comes with him having fun out there.
YAKUZA
