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Xelda

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I ordered a chainsaw off Amazon last week, and I knew before I even touched the box that it was broken. Guess I should have ordered a sofa with it.
I bought a chain saw last week too! It's got four inches of sheer terror ready to unleash on things I don't want to saw by hand. That's about the only size I trust myself with. I could get a larger one, but then my brain will start thinking about other things to cut down. My brain doesn't care about things that are in my best interest all that often. There's a certain pecan tree in my back yard and an irritating oak tree in the neighbors yard. Have home owner's insurance and the police on stand by.

Morning, Pops and all Y'all. I have been so disinterested in football lately that I haven't been looking on the forums lately. Anyway, I just wanted to say hi,
There are things other than football here, Leon. There's the B.S. that certain football fans allow to flow freely. It can be entertaining at times.

How are you doing, Coachadoodles? The National Enquirer, GQ, People, Good Housekeeping, Vogue, National Geographic, us and Glamour called to ask.
 

CouchCoach

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.
 

Bobhaze

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.
My dear friend…this is hard.
 

GrammaJan

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.
Haven’t posted here in a long time, though I’ve been peeking in now and again and monitoring to see how you’re doing. No lie, this is heartbreaking for me and I really hate this news. I won’t go into detail of how I’m feeling right now beyond that, as it’s clouded with emotion from many other things. For now, I cry myself to sleep through everything that’s going on, but will keep saying prayers for you. (If I wasn’t working so much I’d offer to take in those pups of yours, but my job is exactly the reason I don’t have a dog of my own.)
 

CouchCoach

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Haven’t posted here in a long time, though I’ve been peeking in now and again and monitoring to see how you’re doing. No lie, this is heartbreaking for me and I really hate this news. I won’t go into detail of how I’m feeling right now beyond that, as it’s clouded with emotion from many other things. For now, I cry myself to sleep through everything that’s going on, but will keep saying prayers for you. (If I wasn’t working so much I’d offer to take in those pups of yours, but my job is exactly the reason I don’t have a dog of my own.)
Thank you, Jan, for that and I know we have cancer survivors that are a part of this thread, you, Bullet and Xelda that I know of and at one time in my life, right after my wife's ended, I would have been jealous of that but I celebrate every one of those victories over this monster.

This is particularly hard for me to address that my sons lost both of their parents to the same disease and they are not certain now that it isn't the same identical rare form that took my wife. The saving grace is that this particular one is thought by most in the field to be environmentally linked and not hereditary like breast cancer and some others.

But I will go back to what I told you guys when this first was diagnosed. I am OK with it. I haven't actually lived in so long and spent time just existing and surviving, this does not scare me. I have truly lived a Groundhog Day existence for going on 11 years and that's too long.

My problem now is that when I first decided to go the Monkey's Paw route, I had no reservations and that actually gave me something to do with my life, purpose. Now, I bounce whether to chemo or not around in my head and it has taken root and become a preoccupation. And that expiration date they gave me, I forgot to ask of that was "best used by" or "sell by".
 
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GrammaJan

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Thank you, Jan, for that and I know we have cancer survivors that are a part of this thread, you, Bullet and Xelda that I know of and at one time in my life, right after my wife's ended, I would have been jealous of that but I celebrate every one of those victories over this monster.

This is particularly hard for me to address that my sons lost both of their parents to the same disease and they are not certain now that it isn't the same identical rare form that took my wife. The saving grace is that this particular one is thought by most in the field to be environmentally linked and not hereditary like breast cancer and some others.

But I will go back what I told you guys when this first was diagnosed. I am OK with it. I haven't actually lived in so long and spent time just existing and surviving, this does not scare me. I have truly lived a Groundhog Day existence for going on 11 years and that's too long.

My problem now is that when I first decided to go the Monkey's Paw route, I had no reservations and that actually gave me something to do with my life, purpose. Now, I bounce whether to chemo or not around in my head and it has taken root and become a preoccupation. And that expiration date they gave me, I forgot to ask of that was "best used by" or "sell by".

Really makes you want to wring the most out of every experience. It’s really too bad we all can’t just approach every day that way. Grab all the TRUE JOY you can in every moment. If we did I think fewer people would be preoccupied with trying to screw people over and intentionally causing misery in other people’s lives… you know… just living life with good intentions. I think people are scared of caring and doing the right thing because sometimes it hurts. There’s no avoiding that when you care.
 

CouchCoach

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Really makes you want to wring the most out of every experience. It’s really too bad we all can’t just approach every day that way. Grab all the TRUE JOY you can in every moment. If we did I think fewer people would be preoccupied with trying to screw people over and intentionally causing misery in other people’s lives… you know… just living life with good intentions. I think people are scared of caring and doing the right thing because sometimes it hurts. There’s no avoiding that when you care.
I am thankful for the greatest gift in my life, even greater than the one I was given as a soulmate. I would not be alive today if not for this sense of humor that has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. It got me through some times that I wanted to just end it. But I was always able to make myself laugh about it, at the absurdity of it all. It is am amazing gift, cathartic and healing.

When I was first diagnosed and met with my oncologist, she said "the first thing you need to do is to cut out all alcohol and tobacco" and I replied "no, the first thing I need to do is seek a second opinion". She just stopped and looked at me and lost it laughing. She reminded me of that in our last meeting on Wednesday and told me she'd never had a patient that has approached this like I have. I told her that I thought my lifestyle was probably responsible for putting me where I am so why deny it now? Going to uninvite my only two vices left to the party? Hell this for them! And I am not an alcoholic but I am alcohol dependent to keep the demons away. And I refuse to go to any AA meetings without at least a cash bar.

She told me that cancer cells love sugar and alcohol has sugar and I told her that I had already given up cookies, brownies and pie, oh my, so maybe I'd get the cells drunk enough to stumble out my rectum at closing time? I told her of she kept laughing this much, I was going to have to charge her a cover.

We've talked about my view of life and she was aware of my experiences with my wife before we even met so she knows there is this void that can never be filled. But she looked at me just this past week and asked me "how can someone as funny as you not be happy" and I told her sad clowns are real. It is our garlic against the vampires of life that will suck you dry.

And I will try my very best to entertain myself and hopefully, you poor targets, with whatever time I have left. They say "always leave them laughing" and my ultimate goal is to leave here laughing myself. Dear lady, I know you pray but do not pray for miracles for me, pray that I attain my ultimate goal.
 

Runwildboys

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.
I was going to start writing as soon as I saw this post this morning, but I was at a loss for words, and anything I would have written wouldn't have been good enough. There probably isn't "good enough" to cover it.

All I can say is that there are very few people I know who have my complete respect, as well as my love. You're one of the very few, CC.

You may already know this, but I feel it needs to be said: You will be remembered, talked about, and missed by many, and for a long time.

All hail the Eternal Grand Poobah.
 
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CouchCoach

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I was going to start writing as soon as I saw this post this morning, but I was at a loss for words, and anything I would have written wouldn't have been good enough. There probably isn't "good enough" to cover it.

All I can say is that there are very few people I know who have my complete respect, as well as my love. You're one of the very few, CC.

You may already know this, but I feel it needs to be said: You will be remembered, talked about, and missed by many, and for a long time.

All hail the Eternal Grand Poobah.
Thank you, my good friend, wish I was going to be around for that. Especially for those posts from those that didn't like me

If there is an afterlife, I am going to ask if I can come back and haunt the Zone.
 

Cowboys_22

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.

So sorry to hear about this CC. Praying for you

aka RGV
 

nobody

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X Girl, thanks for asking, afraid things have taken a turn for the worse. Had a flare up of the old symptoms and the labs were off the charts on liver enzymes and they did a MRCP. Disney should consider adding that as a ride for the naughty kids to make sure they don't return.

It has grown on the peritoneum and added the liver as a side dish. I am no longer holding it at bay with my Monkey's Paw stuff and Holistic R Than Thou approach and have dropped 5 lbs in a week. They want to put in a port and start chemo/immunotherapy with a best case of 40% having any effect but closer to 100% on the side effects. And the end doesn't change, maybe gets postponed with the chemo quality of life. And the symptoms they've described come anyway. Seems that peritoneum isn't the best place for this to start up for the symptoms part of this which I have pretty much escaped so far.

My son and daughter-in-law felt they needed to tell their kids and did and I am going over Saturday morning and am dreading that trip. I have already been warned that my 6 year old granddaughter has a litany of questions. Hope she doesn't start with "OK, come clean, is there really a Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy"?

And I am stressed about finding a home for my two 14 year old Havanese because they need human contact and not many people want to take on older dogs.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked? Kidding, I know this is a situation without a script. I wanted to tell the Pops people but didn't know how to start. I still don't but the fact is my time is running out and maybe faster than I anticipated. I thought since today marks 1 month after my 6 month expiration date, I might stretch this out more and I have but when they start using weeks to months instead of months and they have the film as proof, hard to argue with them. They do this for a living and this is my first time as an amateur.

With this chemo question, I find myself in the definitive "damned if you do and damned if you don't" and I do not know what I am going to do. I'd rather go out riding tall than hanging across my toilet.

My friends, please do not feel you have to respond to this because I don't know how I would respond to it and I am pretty good with words. I love you guys and you are in my heart. Shame you are not in my liver and you could help kick those squatters out.

Dang. There are no words. Love you, brother.
 

Ranched

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Xelda

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Good afternoon Pops and Popsadoodles. I was checking out some videos on a certain web site I watch on YouTube. They have some on a loop. After the first video, I thought the next would be by them as well. It wasn't and for a few horror stricken moments I watched someone holding down a rabbit and pulling out rabblets. I've never seen a rabbit give birth before and could not believe the pile coming out of her. A hand would go underneath and pull out another and another and another and another etc. Once my brain kicked in, I remembered the loop thing and ran away from the computer. I came back to tell y'all.
 

CouchCoach

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Good afternoon Pops and Popsadoodles. I was checking out some videos on a certain web site I watch on YouTube. They have some on a loop. After the first video, I thought the next would be by them as well. It wasn't and for a few horror stricken moments I watched someone holding down a rabbit and pulling out rabblets. I've never seen a rabbit give birth before and could not believe the pile coming out of her. A hand would go underneath and pull out another and another and another and another etc. Once my brain kicked in, I remembered the loop thing and ran away from the computer. I came back to tell y'all.
Now, someone has to go get hats for those rabbits to come out of next. Must be hell being a rabbit, someone is always pulling them out of stuff. And how do we know the rabbit wants to come out of the hat?

And how lucky was that foot for that rabbit? How many animals have to look forward to an appendage being a key chain? What warped mind came up with that?
 
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Montanalo

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Good afternoon Pops and Popsadoodles. I was checking out some videos on a certain web site I watch on YouTube. They have some on a loop. After the first video, I thought the next would be by them as well. It wasn't and for a few horror stricken moments I watched someone holding down a rabbit and pulling out rabblets. I've never seen a rabbit give birth before and could not believe the pile coming out of her. A hand would go underneath and pull out another and another and another and another etc. Once my brain kicked in, I remembered the loop thing and ran away from the computer. I came back to tell y'all.
"Rabblets"

Now, that's funny!!

I grew up on a ranch and assisted with my fair share of sheep (according to my late father, after teenage boys, sheep are God's dumbest mammals) birthing.

Glad you scouted this for us.. I have no desire to stumble upon a YouTube video of anyone or anything giving birth.

:laugh:
 

Xelda

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Maybe it's time to tell y'all about a dream I had two nights ago. I was too mad to tell it yesterday. If you combine Smokey and the Bandit with 007, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, throw in a dash of Police Squad and a little red wagon you have the foundation of my dream. I was mad because a 1970's Rabert Redford or 1990's Brad Pitt were unavailable. Just what was so important that they couldn't star in my dream? Get me their agents on the phone! Instead I was forced to deal with Burt Reynolds.

The dream starts out weird enough with me receiving an assignment to keep Burt alive at all costs. The budget must have been tight for le mode de transportation, a little red wagon. I was costaring in a low budget B dream. Apparently the fate of the future was tied to the doofus. I was told I had a unique skill set required for the job. I didn't know what my skill set was, but it would be revealed.

I have to track Burt down. The usual twisted government program has run amok. He found out something they didn't want getting out and they're determined to kill him. He needs to stay clear of an area that's of profound interest to him. That's where I find him, I introduce myself, explain why this is not a good place to be and that I'm here to get him out. His response was "Ha Ha, hello there. Don't worry about it, everything's under control". The white coats converge and whisk him away to a high security hospital. Off I go.

I talk my way into the hospital and find him walking around in dress shoes and a hospital gown with the back open, greeting everyone. I tell him we've got to get out of here to a shoulder shrug. I look around his room for something to aid our escape and there's the red wagon. Everything is on a slight angle so the wagon works well with enough weight on it. We grab a few other patients, load up and take off down hallways, through double doors, down stairs, more hallways and stairs until we're outside and have acquired enough momentum to jump the security fence. That last jump is a doozy, everyone falls off and goes their separate ways.

Rinse, repeat a few more times as we take more people out on the wagon. We were laying at all angles over each other and it was silly as we turned corners and everyone tucked in an arm, leg or head to avoid collision. The dream was repetitious as I'd talk or sneak my way in, find him, load the wagon down and follow the trail out. Once we had a hospital cart but found the wagon outside of an elevator, hopped on and hightailed it to safety.

On my last trip to save him, I got into the hospital and found him drugged, with three different colored needles sticking in his big toe and the two beside them on each foot. They were going to slowly release enough toxins to kill him. I ran in, pulled the needles out and smacked him around a bit. That wasn't getting the job done, so I grabbed a large pitcher to fill with ice water. When I turned back to him in anticipation of dousing him, he was sitting up and said "that won't be necessary". Disappointment oozed from every pore on my body. A real Oscar moment if you ask me.

We'd run out of people willing to come with us. We had one oxygen tank left, so we scrounged for weight to get out. Burt was in front grabbing things as we sped past. There were food vendors outside, so he grabbed bags of salt, sugar, rice and meat to pack on so we could get our velocity up and over the fence.

I have since retired from acting in low budget dreams. The end.
 
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