Anti-soccer blog post

[Bob Sacamano]

Holy cripes, soccer sucks.

http://img715.*************/img715/2391/70b20993f64177a4.jpg

 

[theogt]

http://img715.*************/img715/2391/70b20993f64177a4.jpg

That's me being forced to watch soccer.

What a boring, wussified sport.

 

[Hostile]

Here's what I don't get, with so many things to hate in this world (Hitler and such), why do some people spend so much time and energy hating a sport.

I suppose you could scale hatred.

I hate Hitler more than I hate soccer.

I hate soccer more than getting kicked in the pills.


I hate pedophiles more than soccer.

I hate soccer more than text messaging.


Just because I hate some things more, doesn't mean I can't enjoy my soccer hate and share it with my fellow haters. I decided not to spoil the other pro-soccer thread. But this one is pure ambrosia for a soccer hater.

 

[tecolote]

I suppose you could scale hatred.

I hate Hitler more than I hate soccer.

I hate soccer more than getting kicked in the pills.


I hate pedophiles more than soccer.

I hate soccer more than text messaging.


Just because I hate some things more, doesn't mean I can't enjoy my soccer hate and share it with my fellow haters. I decided not to spoil the other pro-soccer thread. But this one is pure ambrosia for a soccer hater.

I get that Hos. I hate getting kicked in the pills as well, but I would not go posting that getting kicked in the pills sucks in every thread started by people that like getting kicked in the pills.

And I appreciate you holding off in posting in the World Cup thread, you must have been chomping at the bit to do that.

Another thing, I know you hate soccer but here it goes. The US plays on friday at 9AM central, just turn your TV at about 20 to 9 and listen to the Star-Spangled Banner with the players on the field, I promise you will get goosebumps.

If you want to turn off the TV after that it's your call.

 

[bbgun]

Stolen from a political site that I frequent:

I have a liberal friend who’s rabid about soccer. He even writes as a blog/journalist on some soccer web sites. So I gave him my rundown on why I don’t like soccer and it has nothing to do with politics or low scores. And I think the majority of Americans probably would agree with it.

Single-dimensional game. Most American sports require multi-dimensional skill sets…throwing, running, kicking, hitting, tackling, catching, dribbling, shooting, etc…Soccer is single-dimensional. Running and kicking. That’s it.

Luck or skill? When only 1 out of 20 passes in front of the goal results in a legitimate shot on goal attempt, (score or no score), it starts to look more like luck than skill. With such a low percentage it gives the appearance (rightly or wrongly) that they just kick it around until somebody lucks into a shot. The “successful assist” percentage needs to be much higher. Imagine if only 1 in 20 basketball passes resulted in a shot. Hockey actually suffers from the same problem, but even their “assists” percentage is higher than soccer.

Kicking it away from the other team. Any sport where you deliberately just kick it down to the opposite end as far as you can just to get it away from your end is suspect. Once again, Hockey pleads guilty to this as well. At least in football punts are caught and run back and can potentially result in one of the most exciting plays of the game.

Athleticism… in the USA the best athletes play 1) football 2) basketball 3) baseball 4) hockey 5) the rest (including soccer). Any sport where our 5th best athletes can match up on the world level with the best athletes from the other countries doesn’t say much for the athleticism and skill level of the game as a whole. Our 5th best athletes should rightly be getting their butts kicked. If they’re not, then the other guys aren’t that good either. Which takes you back to…luck or skill (see #2).

Celebrating a tie….any sport where you celebrate a tie…especially when somebody else booted the ball to allow you to score…is suspect.

I really think soccer athletes just don’t match up to football/basketball/baseball athletes. Yes, they run longer distances…but so do marathon runners. They’re not faster, stronger, quicker, higher jumpers, etc…they just have more stamina. Other than that they’re not very impressive as far as “athletes” go…not compared to traditional-American-sport athletes. And that is why Americans don’t care for soccer. We’re just not that impressed.

 

[Hostile]

I get that Hos. I hate getting kicked in the pills as well, but I would not go posting that getting kicked in the pills sucks in every thread started by people that like getting kicked in the pills.

But that isn't what this thread is. Look at the title. It is a hate soccer thread. So we want people who hate soccer, like me, to chime in.

And I appreciate you holding off in posting in the World Cup thread, you must have been chomping at the bit to do that.

Naw, not really. I hated to even see it. Made me kind of nauseous.

Another thing, I know you hate soccer but here it goes. The US plays on friday at 9AM central, just turn your TV at about 20 to 9 and listen to the Star-Spangled Banner with the players on the field, I promise you will get goosebumps.

The 4th verse of the Star Spangled Banner gives me more goosebumps than the 1st verse, but the last 3 verses are seldom sung. Here are the lyrics...

Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thru the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore dimly seen through the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected, now shines on the stream:
Tis the star-spangled banner: O, long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion
A home and a country should leave us no more?
Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O, thus be it ever when freemen shall stand,
Between their loved home and the war's desolation!
Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause. it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust"
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

If you want to turn off the TV after that it's your call.

I would. Hearing that song would not change my tune about the game.

 

[tecolote]

You know what, who am I to step between a man and his hatred of soccer. Hate away Hos, have fun in this thread.

 

[SaltwaterServr]

Most popular = appealing to the lowest common idiotic denominator for the entire globe.

Two kids with a coconut husk and a line in the sand can play soccer. It's the least advanced sport in the world as far as requiring any kind of "technology". Even in baseball you need a stick to hit the coconut husk with.

The popularity springs from the simplicity and doesn't make it a "great" sport, only a sport that any two half starved third world morons can play at any given time.

More people saw Titanic than any other movie. That make it the best movie in history? No, it appealed to the lowest common denominator.

I read somewhere that Beringer White Zinfandel is one of the biggest selling wines in the world. Does that popularity change the fact that it's absolute garbage in a bottle as opposed to absolute garbage of a sport? Nope, appeals to the lowest common denominator.

I have to agree with everything BBGun posted. Our 5th best compete with the "best in the world." What a joke.

It the NFL wildcard round ended with a bunch of 7-3 or 6-3 scores, we'd say that those games really sucked and not that it was heavy duty defensive play. Even the best defenses in the NFL get scored on.

In the World Cup, the best offenses in the entire world are scoring twice. Twice. Score, Score, now sit around for 90 minutes and hope someone gets in a fight in the stands.

One of the reasons the World Cup is so popular is that it allows wholly insignificant nations such as Slovakia to actually be recognized for a few seconds. What would Slovakia rank as far as GDP of the individual States and territories of the United States? Dead last?

How about Argentina? Do they even make the news when they aren't invading the Faulklands?

Half-***** near backward countries get to compete at the only thing they'll be good at. History has passed them by. They are immaterial and irrelevant to international commerce, culture, or politics. Once every four years they can score a goal and be, for a moment, on par with the greatest nation in the world and we as Americans don't even care enough to notice. They're just fleas hanging on our **** before they fade back into obscurity.

For another matter, the soccer "athletes" aren't that great of athletes to begin with. They can run and kick. That doesn't require the dexterity of a jump shot, slap shot, saving a goal in hockey, or eluding a 245 pound linebacker before you put a football through a window with a 1/2 inch to spare between the WR and the CB.

Even their "pitch" can't hold up to our football. We tore up their field in one half of football when the Giants played in England. One single half. Destroyed the field. Soccer "athletes" are playing game after game on that field in South Africa with no real wear and tear on it, I assume. Put two of the worst NFL teams out there and it would look like it was ready for planting come the next day.

Soccer, give me a break and get back in the closet for the next four years. Nike and ESPN can cram it down our throats we care, but in watching the games on TV, the game flat out sucks in every regard.

 

[Rynie]

I hate soccer too, but I was in London in '02 when England played Brazil in the World Cup. As much as I hate soccer, I do appreciate how SERIOUS the fans are about their team.

The game was televised at 7:00 in the morning (London time). We were told by a local to go to Trafalgar Square. My buddy and I wake up at 7, buy a six-pack of Heineken, and hop on "the tube" toward the square.

We get there around 7:20ish. There are literally THOUSANDS of people crowding the square, even hanging on the statues. They played the game on a huge screen for the fans.

It's 7:00 AM and people are PISSED DRUNK. These people are CRAZY. I had more fun walking around. I could care less about the game. England looks like they're in trouble. I told by friend "let's get out of here."

Good thing we left early. We watched the news that night and there were riots in Trafalgar square because they ended up losing. It was a good experience.

 

[SaltwaterServr]

I hate soccer too, but I was in London in '02 when England played Brazil in the World Cup. As much as I hate soccer, I do appreciate how SERIOUS the fans are about their team.

The game was televised at 7:00 in the morning (London time). We were told by a local to go to Trafalgar Square. My buddy and I wake up at 7, buy a six-pack of Heineken, and hop on "the tube" toward the square.

We get there around 7:20ish. There are literally THOUSANDS of people crowding the square, even hanging on the statues. They played the game on a huge screen for the fans.

It's 7:00 AM and people are PISSED DRUNK. These people are CRAZY. I had more fun walking around. I could care less about the game. England looks like they're in trouble. I told by friend "let's get out of here."

Good thing we left early. We watched the news that night and there were riots in Trafalgar square because they ended up losing. It was a good experience.

That just makes my point, lowest common denominator appeal. Stab proof vests in your team colors aren't sold for the NBA, NFL, MLB, or NHL. They are sold for the World Cup. Soccer fans make Eagles fans look like tea-sipping sophisticates.

 

[ZeroClub]

I hate major league baseball more than I hate bussel sprouts.

I hate NASCAR as much as I hate major league baseball.

I hate the NBA about as much as I hate brussel sprouts.

I prefer the NFL to any other sport. SEC football is my second most favorite.

I enjoy World Cup games more than I enjoy watching the Summer Olympics, but not by a wide margin.

I don't mind cauliflower if it is steamed.

 

[Cythim]

Why are the Cowboys the most popular team in the most popular sport in America? Oh, it must be because they appeal to the lowest common denominator.

 

[daschoo]

Most popular = appealing to the lowest common idiotic denominator for the entire globe.

Two kids with a coconut husk and a line in the sand can play soccer. It's the least advanced sport in the world as far as requiring any kind of "technology". Even in baseball you need a stick to hit the coconut husk with.

The popularity springs from the simplicity and doesn't make it a "great" sport, only a sport that any two half starved third world morons can play at any given time.

More people saw Titanic than any other movie. That make it the best movie in history? No, it appealed to the lowest common denominator.

I read somewhere that Beringer White Zinfandel is one of the biggest selling wines in the world. Does that popularity change the fact that it's absolute garbage in a bottle as opposed to absolute garbage of a sport? Nope, appeals to the lowest common denominator.

I have to agree with everything BBGun posted. Our 5th best compete with the "best in the world." What a joke.

It the NFL wildcard round ended with a bunch of 7-3 or 6-3 scores, we'd say that those games really sucked and not that it was heavy duty defensive play. Even the best defenses in the NFL get scored on.

In the World Cup, the best offenses in the entire world are scoring twice. Twice. Score, Score, now sit around for 90 minutes and hope someone gets in a fight in the stands.

One of the reasons the World Cup is so popular is that it allows wholly insignificant nations such as Slovakia to actually be recognized for a few seconds. What would Slovakia rank as far as GDP of the individual States and territories of the United States? Dead last?

How about Argentina? Do they even make the news when they aren't invading the Faulklands?

Half-***** near backward countries get to compete at the only thing they'll be good at. History has passed them by. They are immaterial and irrelevant to international commerce, culture, or politics. Once every four years they can score a goal and be, for a moment, on par with the greatest nation in the world and we as Americans don't even care enough to notice. They're just fleas hanging on our **** before they fade back into obscurity.

For another matter, the soccer "athletes" aren't that great of athletes to begin with. They can run and kick. That doesn't require the dexterity of a jump shot, slap shot, saving a goal in hockey, or eluding a 245 pound linebacker before you put a football through a window with a 1/2 inch to spare between the WR and the CB.

Even their "pitch" can't hold up to our football. We tore up their field in one half of football when the Giants played in England. One single half. Destroyed the field. Soccer "athletes" are playing game after game on that field in South Africa with no real wear and tear on it, I assume. Put two of the worst NFL teams out there and it would look like it was ready for planting come the next day.

Soccer, give me a break and get back in the closet for the next four years. Nike and ESPN can cram it down our throats we care, but in watching the games on TV, the game flat out sucks in every regard.

not going to try and convert you to the sport, rather point out a few flaws in your post.

firstly if all i had was a cocunut i'd much rather get a makeshift game of american football going than football. have you ever tried kicking a cocunut? plus i'm assuming these kids are barefoot since they're so poor they're playing with a cocunut. if you're saying all you need is a makeshift ball then the same applies to american football.

your 5th best athletes don't compete with the best in the world. plus even if you want to use the odd result against top class opposition as an argument you do then compare the populations of the countries. even accounting for the nfl, nba, nhl you still have a bigger population to pull potential athletes from than countries like argentina, holland etc.

goals mean more because they're harder to come by. if you don't like that there isn't more scoring fair enough thats your opinion but i disagree. yes i enjoy watching high scoring games but i also enjoy watching the approach play.

the bit about insignificant countries just comes across as bitter and arrogant to be honest.

not being great athletes because its just kicking. you try threading a 30 yard pass between 3 defenders with the correct weight for your team mate to run onto and shoot without breaking his stride and then tell me theres no skill involved.

how would an american football pitch hold up if you played polo on it? would the horses not tear up the pitch? does that make american football an inferior sport?

 

[Maikeru-sama]

Why are the Cowboys the most popular team in the most popular sport in America? Oh, it must be because they appeal to the lowest common denominator.

Leave the Cowboys out of this :laugh2:

Personally, I am not a soccer fan but that mainly has to do with the fact that I grew up in America, which is a country where the sport is not popular beyond 6th grade. If I grew up in a country like Brazil or England, I would probably be a soccer fan.

Also, for those that say you don't have to be very athletic to play soccer and it requires no skill, I was just looking up some the salaries of soccer players and those guys get paid a ton of money, so maybe you should try out for one of the professional teams, if this is the case.

But some of the responses in this thread are just typical American arrogance. Saying that the sports sucks just because it is not popular in America :bang2: .

[/Cue the "Why do you hate America" responses :laugh2: ]

 

[Doomsday101]

well you were a colony, why don't you play soccer too?

Why do you think we kicked the British out, we wanted to play a real mans game not kick ball.

 

[tecolote]

Most popular = appealing to the lowest common idiotic denominator for the entire globe.

Two kids with a coconut husk and a line in the sand can play soccer. It's the least advanced sport in the world as far as requiring any kind of "technology". Even in baseball you need a stick to hit the coconut husk with.

It breaks my heart to think of the millions of kids in the streets of London, Paris and Madrid looking in vain for coconuts to play soccer with.

Your drivel was arrogant and uninformed at best, moronic and biased at worst, you should stop playing with your coconuts and get a clue.

 

[Cythim]

Stolen from a political site that I frequent:

I have a liberal friend who’s rabid about soccer. He even writes as a blog/journalist on some soccer web sites. So I gave him my rundown on why I don’t like soccer and it has nothing to do with politics or low scores. And I think the majority of Americans probably would agree with it.

Single-dimensional game. Most American sports require multi-dimensional skill sets…throwing, running, kicking, hitting, tackling, catching, dribbling, shooting, etc…Soccer is single-dimensional. Running and kicking. That’s it.

You named two dimensions. FAIL.

Luck or skill?

When only 1 out of 20 passes in front of the goal results in a legitimate shot on goal attempt, (score or no score), it starts to look more like luck than skill. With such a low percentage it gives the appearance (rightly or wrongly) that they just kick it around until somebody lucks into a shot. The “successful assist” percentage needs to be much higher. Imagine if only 1 in 20 basketball passes resulted in a shot. Hockey actually suffers from the same problem, but even their “assists” percentage is higher than soccer.

If the game were based on luck it would be impossible to win with any kind of consistancy. If you want to look back at the history of the best clubs and international teams you will find they consistantly win. It is possible to luck into a goal (US vs England) the way David Tyree lucked into his Super Bowl winning catch but most goals require the skill seen in Santonio Holmes' Super Bowl winning touchdown.

Kicking it away from the other team

. Any sport where you deliberately just kick it down to the opposite end as far as you can just to get it away from your end is suspect. Once again, Hockey pleads guilty to this as well. At least in football punts are caught and run back and can potentially result in one of the most exciting plays of the game.

This is just nitpicking. In the football they run down the clock and baseball intentionally walks batters while basketball has deliberate fouls. It is just a part of the culture of the game.

Athleticism

… in the USA the best athletes play 1) football 2) basketball 3) baseball 4) hockey 5) the rest (including soccer). Any sport where our 5th best athletes can match up on the world level with the best athletes from the other countries doesn’t say much for the athleticism and skill level of the game as a whole. Our 5th best athletes should rightly be getting their butts kicked. If they’re not, then the other guys aren’t that good either. Which takes you back to…luck or skill (see #2).

Our best athletes do not match up with the best athletes from the other countries. We are currently ranked 14th in the world amongst countries with a much smaller population. Brazil is the biggest with 2/3rds our population while the average population of the 13 teams in front of us is 1/5th the size of our own.

Celebrating a tie

….any sport where you celebrate a tie…especially when somebody else booted the ball to allow you to score…is suspect.

Ties are actually disappointing for most teams. An underdog (USA vs England) will be glad to come away with a tie when they are supposed to lose but for the superior team the tie is just as bad as a loss. Ties happen in just about every sport (just ask the Eagles) so this arguement really isn't that good.

I really think soccer athletes just don’t match up to football/basketball/baseball athletes. Yes, they run longer distances…but so do marathon runners. They’re not faster, stronger, quicker, higher jumpers, etc…they just have more stamina. Other than that they’re not very impressive as far as “athletes” go…not compared to traditional-American-sport athletes. And that is why Americans don’t care for soccer. We’re just not that impressed.

This statement is blantantly biased and wrong. Soccer players are all of those things, and moreso than baseball players and atleast half of all football players. You can watch a game for five minutes and figure this out.

 

[Yeagermeister]

It breaks my heart to think of the millions of kids in the streets of London, Paris and Madrid looking in vain for coconuts to play soccer with.

Your drivel was arrogant and uninformed at best, moronic and biased at worst, you should stop playing with your coconuts and get a clue.

Are you trying to tell me coconuts migrate? :laugh2:

 

[Hostile]

You know what, who am I to step between a man and his hatred of soccer. Hate away Hos, have fun in this thread.

This is why I sing songs about how great you are. You just get it.

Thanks. In your honor I will post my all time favorite soccer video. The only soccer video I actually enjoy.

[youtube]3lZDSud6HIs&[/youtube]


Okay, so I like this one too.

[youtube]IjynbUNlvWU[/youtube]

 

[Doomsday101]

This is why I sing songs about how great you are. You just get it.

Thanks. In your honor I will post my all time favorite soccer video. The only soccer video I actually enjoy.

[youtube]3lZDSud6HIs&[/youtube]


Okay, so I like this one too.

[youtube]IjynbUNlvWU[/youtube]

That is one physical sport.