Morning Pops and our two veg out planners which is so foreign to me. I am into spontaneous veggin'......since 2011.
Jan starts out with a veggin' plan and then wrecks it. And if I had a Mom confused about the barnyard and ending up with too many cat eggs, I'd help her out as well. I dunno, I am a city boy but if she has too many cats, that explains the cat egg surplus. I know what cats do. Never seen them but I've heard them and was afraid to look.
I am not going to tell you I am veggin' out, I am so into veggin', I drop the g like a good Southren boy. Not a typo, that's how we say it down here, down yonder to you yankees and midwesteners.
Y'all know how the midwest got it's name, dontchya? Well then, grab a corn crate and sit a spell. (I know, there's probably no such thing as a corn crate, I am not entirely blind to my ignorance) The Midwest was named by Ephraim Tunnel, one of the laziest pioneers in recorded, or in this case, unrecorded, history. He and his kin responded to Horace Greeley's declaration "Go West, young man, go West" and they headed out in a wagon train to establish themselves and a whole new life in the Wild, Wild West.
Ephraim liked the sound of the West, what he didn't like was the Wild, Wild part and talk of wild savages taking scalps, wild animals taking body parts and rattlesnakes. He was so lazy, he'd sit out in the afternoons, during one of the many rest stops (he was also the father of the rest stop but that's a story for another time) with a book open, waiting for a breeze to come along and turn the page. He sat the wrong way one time, fell asleep and had to start the book over.
So when they reached Iowa, like most Americans he didn't know the difference between that and Idaho, he announced that was as far as they were going. When Jebidiah said "but Ephraim, this ain't the West, there ain't no ocean". Ephraim responded "can you see across this here lake"? "No, I can't". "Then how the hell (Ephraim was a sinner) do you know that's not the ocean"? Point was well made and Ephraim named this new land the Midwest. He also forbade accents in the new land and instructed them to all speak the same. He exiled a family from Boston.
Well now, I've already lied, storytellin' ain't veggin', it's workin' so I'll just counter that by droppin' all the g's.
Have a great weekend, Popsadoodles.