I can't hug my dad

[kskboys]

This is awesome. So glad you got the chance to have that with your dad before passing. And you don’t have to carry that regret the rest of your life.

my moms last conversation with her brother was an argument. And he died unexpectedly.

that was 33 years ago and it still haunts her and she carries guilt to this day.

never want to be in that situation.

I had a friend die when I was in HS. It has always bothered me that I wasn't nicer to him.

 

[HungryLion]

I had a friend die when I was in HS. It has always bothered me that I wasn't nicer to him.

Try not to be hard on yourself my friend. I think
It’s normal to feel that guilt. Part of the grieving
Process. But we do have to also remember to
Forgive ourselves.


I feel guilty about my grandmothers death which happened last month. I visited her often prior
To covid and then didn’t since March because
Of covid. Then she died.

if I had known she was going to die. I
Would have went to see her and taken my newborn baby to see her..... which she only got to see pictures of and
Didn’t meet in person.

but we can’t be overly hard on ourselves..... it’s the one of the hard things
About life. We don’t always know
When the time will come.

 

[HotDog37]

Hug your Dad, he will act like you are doing something wrong but inside he will love it. Just do it.

 

[DallasEast]

@Ranching ? Does your father know Jiu Jitsu? If he does, sneak up behind him and give him a big ole bear hug. His flipping you over and slamming you face down into hard concrete will be his way of saying 'I love you' back.

 

[Ranching]

@Ranching ? Does your father know Jiu Jitsu? If he does, sneak up behind him and give him a big ole bear hug. His flipping you over and slamming you face down into hard concrete will be his way of saying 'I love you' back.

No, but he carries a pistol.....

 

[DallasEast]

No, but he carries a pistol.....

...consider it as a bullet of love.

 

[Runwildboys]

...consider it as a bullet of love.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! That's not what they mean by "Love Gun"!

 

[Cowboys_22]

I was raised to be tough and not show emotion. My dad is 85....he's 6'3" and 220lbs. I have seen him every day since March and he is the main reason I retired from coaching. I love him more than anything, but I cannot bring myself to tell him that or even hug him. Is that weird?

Amigo, I know the feeling. Just tell your dad, “ Jefe, haste pa quack!” and give him a big hug. The last time I hugged my dad was when he was in the coffin but I was glad I had given him many hugs while he was alive.

 

[Bigdog]

I can totally relate, but please take some friendly advice and hug him and tell him you love him before its too late. You'll feel so much better.

This. Men are sometimes brought up not to show emotion as people might perceive it to be weak. That is false. We human beings that have feelings and emotions.

 

[ClappingCarrot]

I can't hug my dad either, but for different reasons and both of us seem unwilling to change them.

At least you have a relationship and decades worth of time together. My dad and I are in a seemingly endless war to see who can out-petty the other and we are far too much alike to resolve any of our differences.

 

[CouchCoach]

When I was about 16, I made my Dad cry because I had driven him to the point that he could not handle it. He sat down on the edge of my bed and openly cried and at the time that had little effect on me. That has had a long lasting effect on me once I realized I was a problem. I was so antagonistic, if he'd suggested I eat, I would have died from hunger. My resentment was so deep, I was the one really being harmed by it. I was defiant and proud of it. I was also really immature.

I finally did resolve our differences before he passed away but I honestly mourned what could have been if he'd known or learned how to be a father more than his passing.

 

[HungryLion]

My dad’s urologist believes he may have prostate cancer.


He is scheduled for a biopsy in a few weeks.

I am trying to maintain level headedness, knowing that the results may come back negative, and if they don’t and it is cancer. I am hoping it’s in the very treatable stages.

I’m terrified though. It’s hard to even think about the possibility of losing him anytime soon.


@Ranching make sure you hug your dad when you get a chance buddy.

 

[Ranching]

My dad’s urologist believes he may have prostate cancer.


He is scheduled for a biopsy in a few weeks.

I am trying to maintain level headedness, knowing that the results may come back negative, and if they don’t and it is cancer. I am hoping it’s in the very treatable stages.

I’m terrified though. It’s hard to even think about the possibility of losing him anytime soon.


@Ranching make sure you hug your dad when you get a chance buddy.

Sorry to hear that. Prayers for your dad and your family. Thats scary. I took my dad to get his vaccine on Tuesday, we spent the entire day together. I've put my arm around him. We're getting there. Believe or not, it's been kinda cool after bringing it up here. I told him I loved him on Facebook and he told me he loved me too. I took a screenshot of it. Sounds cheesy, but I feel good about it.
Good luck to your dad, brother.

 

[JohnnyTheFox]

My dad’s urologist believes he may have prostate cancer.


He is scheduled for a biopsy in a few weeks.

I am trying to maintain level headedness, knowing that the results may come back negative, and if they don’t and it is cancer. I am hoping it’s in the very treatable stages.

I’m terrified though. It’s hard to even think about the possibility of losing him anytime soon.


@Ranching make sure you hug your dad when you get a chance buddy.

Healing prayers for you and your Father.

 

[CouchCoach]

My dad’s urologist believes he may have prostate cancer.


He is scheduled for a biopsy in a few weeks.

I am trying to maintain level headedness, knowing that the results may come back negative, and if they don’t and it is cancer. I am hoping it’s in the very treatable stages.

I’m terrified though. It’s hard to even think about the possibility of losing him anytime soon.


@Ranching make sure you hug your dad when you get a chance buddy.

DP, do everything you can to be positive for your Dad as well as yourself and your family. Even force yourself, if necessary.

I was a card carrying pessimist most of my life and proud to tell anyone "I am either right or pleasantly surprised" until my wife was diagnosed and I had to change, I had to become so positive that I hardly recognized myself.

That did not end well; however, I do not regret one second of that effect on that time and my life and for the first time in my life, I understood the true value of optimism. It carries it's own reward, it is not in the results.

That particular cancer is one they've made the most progress against and have come such a long way. Good thoughts your way.

 

[HungryLion]

DP, do everything you can to be positive for your Dad as well as yourself and your family. Even force yourself, if necessary.

I was a card carrying pessimist most of my life and proud to tell anyone "I am either right or pleasantly surprised" until my wife was diagnosed and I had to change, I had to become so positive that I hardly recognized myself.

That did not end well; however, I do not regret one second of that effect on that time and my life and for the first time in my life, I understood the true value of optimism. It carries it's own reward, it is not in the results.

That particular cancer is one they've made the most progress against and have come such a long way. Good thoughts your way.

Thank you for the kind words from you, from ranching, from Johnny. I appreciate it. It helps a lot.

I am going to hope for the best. My dad and mom said the urologist seemed pretty laid back and laissez faire about the whole thing. And was basically like “well if it is cancer we will just take the prostate out. Don’t worry about it”


We don’t know if that’s just his mentality as a person, or if it’s because he has seen this type of stuff so often, he is confident he can treat it and get it taken care of. I am going to hope that’s the case.


Thank you everyone for the emotional support.

 

[CouchCoach]

Thank you for the kind words from you, from ranching, from Johnny. I appreciate it. It helps a lot.

I am going to hope for the best. My dad and mom said the urologist seemed pretty laid back and laissez faire about the whole thing. And was basically like “well if it is cancer we will just take the prostate out. Don’t worry about it”


We don’t know if that’s just his mentality as a person, or if it’s because he has seen this type of stuff so often, he is confident he can treat it and get it taken care of. I am going to hope that’s the case.


Thank you everyone for the emotional support.

Thank you for sharing.

When something like this first happened on the old forum I was on, I was taken aback by the outpouring and support and that made the connection for me. It's not about the Cowboys or football, it's about the people on this site. That, is the magic.

 

[Runwildboys]

My dad’s urologist believes he may have prostate cancer.


He is scheduled for a biopsy in a few weeks.

I am trying to maintain level headedness, knowing that the results may come back negative, and if they don’t and it is cancer. I am hoping it’s in the very treatable stages.

I’m terrified though. It’s hard to even think about the possibility of losing him anytime soon.


@Ranching make sure you hug your dad when you get a chance buddy.

I get the feeling that if the urologist was very worried, your father's biopsy would be scheduled more immediately. Fingers crossed, no matter whether he has it or not, he'll come through with flying colors!

 

[HungryLion]

I get the feeling that if the urologist was very worried, your father's biopsy would be scheduled more immediately. Fingers crossed, no matter whether he has it or not, he'll come through with flying colors!

Thanks bro. I appreciate it the kind words!

 

[DallasDomination]

Absolutely hug and tell your dad you love him.

I have a rocky relationship with my dad; and I still tell him I love him. He’s your dad. And he won’t be around for ever.