OT: How long have you been married?

[LaTunaNostra]

thats why now i only get involved with rich women or those that make more money than me.:

Clever boy.

I make decent money, and can support myself well enough.

But that ain't the point.

The point would be you got "the best years of my life", and unless you can give age 25-40 back to me, I will have to settle for spending my golden years on the Rivieira.

 

[CowboyPrincess]

Clever boy.

I make decent money, and can support myself well enough.

But that ain't the point.

The point would be you got "the best years of my life", and unless you can give age 25-40 back to me, I will have to settle for spending my golden years on the Rivieira.

Can I join you on the Rivieira? I hear the men are really hot there...

 

[Juke99]

Make them an offer they can't refuse...

I will...I'll offer you for membership.

 

[Juke99]

Clever boy.

I make decent money, and can support myself well enough.

But that ain't the point.

The point would be you got "the best years of my life", and unless you can give age 25-40 back to me, I will have to settle for spending my golden years on the Rivieira.

I owned a Riviera...1980...white...it was lovely.

Does that make me qualify?

 

[Hoov]

Clever boy.

I make decent money, and can support myself well enough.

But that ain't the point.

The point would be you got "the best years of my life", and unless you can give age 25-40 back to me, I will have to settle for spending my golden years on the Rivieira.

But you got the best years of his life too, right ?

 

[CowboyPrincess]

I owned a Riviera...1980...white...it was lovely.

Does that make me qualify?

25 yrs old... I think that falls into the age range we'll be checking out at the Riviera...humm

 

[LaTunaNostra]

I could have taken the route that you suggested... very easily.. but I couldn't get rid of the feeling that alimony was payment for sleeping with me during the marriage... felt like a *****. Besides, I didn't want to have to ever see him or hear of him again... instead, I got a great story to tell boyfriends as a warning of things to come if you screw me over....

I've got an ex-boyfriend right now that is paying the price for recently screwing me over... and he is paying a hefty price

He even told me he would have preferred the super glue... LOL

I've yet to be "screwed over", so I can't comment from experience. However, I'd have no problem being 'tough' in such a case.

I think alimony is appropriate when a woman has sacrificed her career, to any extent, for a man's. I did get my doctorate while I was married, but l also saw my hubby thru an Ivy League education, and any decisions made have ALWAYS been made with his career in mind over mine.

The difference was I took a full time teaching job when I was ABD, and had to write my dissertation while teaching full time, (a nightmare) but I insisted when he did his grad work, he work just part-time to get it done fast.

I went the traditional route, putting him first, (for example, turning down my dream job because he would have to relocate) and now he makes considerably more than me. (OK , he's also a whole lot smarter, but so what?)

So my definition of whoredom wouldn't include the inability to maintain my prior standard of living because he did something wrong...ie, cheating. (He'd meet my def of one tho. I could be making more if I hadn't put him first.

Or if I got off this freaking board, LMAO.

In addition, in 1993 my guy had a serious car accident, and between 93 and 96 had no less than 21 operations. Most of them outpatient, but one as long as 17 hours on the operating table. It was three years of doctors, physical therapists, home aides, appointments, etc. Our insurance didn't cover some of the better rehabilitative services, so I took a second job to pay for them, as well as the best cranio-facial surgeon in the state.

Thru all of that, he never had to worry about my leaving him. And I know he wil never leave me, so the discussion is academic. I've been pretty lucky because I married the first man I fell in love with, and hopefully, the last. The only man in my life, really.

But in both theory and reality, if he did mess up, he'd have to pay the piper BIG TIME for cheating.

Just as I would if I cheated on him.

 

[LaTunaNostra]

I owned a Riviera...1980...white...it was lovely.

Does that make me qualify?

Those Buicks were bigger than the French or Italian Riviera combined.

My mom had one once, what a car.

 

[Hoov]

I've yet to be "screwed over", so I can't comment from experience. However, I'd have no problem being 'tough' in such a case.

I think alimony is appropriate when a woman has sacrificed her career, to any extent, for a man's. I did get my doctorate while I was married, but l also saw my hubby thru an Ivy League education, and any decisions made have ALWAYS been made with his career in mind over mine.

The difference was I took a full time teaching job when I was ABD, and had to write my dissertation while teaching full time, (a nightmare) but I insisted when he did his grad work, he work just part-time to get it done fast.

I went the traditional route, putting him first, (for example, turning down my dream job because he would have to relocate) and now he makes considerably more than me. (OK , he's also a whole lot smarter, but so what?)

So my definition of whoredom wouldn't include the inability to maintain my prior standard of living because he did something wrong...ie, cheating. (He'd meet my def of one tho. I could be making more if I hadn't put him first.

Or if I got off this freaking board, LMAO.

In addition, in 1993 my guy had a serious car accident, and between 93 and 96 had no less than 21 operations. Most of them outpatient, but one as long as 17 hours on the operating table. It was three years of doctors, physical therapists, home aides, appointments, etc. Our insurance didn't cover some of the better rehabilitative services, so I took a second job to pay for them, as well as the best cranio-facial surgeon in the state.

Thru all of that, he never had to worry about my leaving him. And I know he wil never leave me, so the discussion is academic. I've been pretty lucky because I married the first man I fell in love with, and hopefully, the last. The only man in my life, really.

But in both theory and reality, if he did mess up, he'd have to pay the piper BIG TIME for cheating.

Just as I would if I cheated on him.

I dont necessarily think a couple thats been together for a long time and are seemingly happy should split up because one cheated on the other. Its hard to find someone you can stand to be around every day, and then its even rarer if that same person enjoys your company enough to live with you day in and out. I mean, why is sex such a big deal, for most of us we werent virgins when we met our spouses so the idea that someone had sex with someone else, well to me its not the end of the world as long as they are willing to come clean and discuss everything and then you can move on from there.

Now if it turns out that the person is lying and manipulative and just a cheater by nature, well that is different than someone who loves you and just screwed up, i think.

 

[Yeagermeister]

I've yet to be "screwed over", so I can't comment from experience. However, I'd have no problem being 'tough' in such a case.

I think alimony is appropriate when a woman has sacrificed her career, to any extent, for a man's. I did get my doctorate while I was married, but l also saw my hubby thru an Ivy League education, and any decisions made have ALWAYS been made with his career in mind over mine.

The difference was I took a full time teaching job when I was ABD, and had to write my dissertation while teaching full time, (a nightmare) but I insisted when he did his grad work, he work just part-time to get it done fast.

I went the traditional route, putting him first, (for example, turning down my dream job because he would have to relocate) and now he makes considerably more than me. (OK , he's also a whole lot smarter, but so what?)

So my definition of whoredom wouldn't include the inability to maintain my prior standard of living because he did something wrong...ie, cheating. (He'd meet my def of one tho. I could be making more if I hadn't put him first.

Or if I got off this freaking board, LMAO.

In addition, in 1993 my guy had a serious car accident, and between 93 and 96 had no less than 21 operations. Most of them outpatient, but one as long as 17 hours on the operating table. It was three years of doctors, physical therapists, home aides, appointments, etc. Our insurance didn't cover some of the better rehabilitative services, so I took a second job to pay for them, as well as the best cranio-facial surgeon in the state.

Thru all of that, he never had to worry about my leaving him. And I know he wil never leave me, so the discussion is academic. I've been pretty lucky because I married the first man I fell in love with, and hopefully, the last. The only man in my life, really.

But in both theory and reality, if he did mess up, he'd have to pay the piper BIG TIME for cheating.

Just as I would if I cheated on him.

Until Terry Glenn comes knocking

 

[Hoov]

Also a side note, i dont know about texas but here in PA there is no such thing as alimony anymore. and spousal support is granted only in rare cases where one person did not work at all and the other has a high paying job.

So my advice in this day and age would be dont put your career on hold for your spouse unless you really dont want to work, or you are doing it for your kids. because if you just do it out of courtesy for your spouse you may be screwed later if you end up in divorce.

 

[LaTunaNostra]

Until Terry Glenn comes knocking

LOL, Yeager.

Hey, I've met Terry Glenn. He's hooked up with a lovely girl who was a student at the school I used to teach summers in..where the Pats trained for over 20 years.

Terry is adorable, but nowhere near the hunk I married, who has higher echelon brains as well as looks. Next to my guy, who is super masculine, and both handsome and beautiful, Terry Glenn is a girl. And not even a pretty one.

The only player I would look twice at in the real world (if I were ten years younger and single, that is) is Lawyer Milloy.

That man has the goods.

And he's almost as sexy as my husband.

 

[Yeagermeister]

LOL, Yeager.

Hey, I've met Terry Glenn. He's hooked up with a lovely girl who was a student at the school I used to teach summers in..where the Pats trained for over 20 years.

Terry is adorable, but nowhere near the hunk I married, who has higher echelon brains as well as looks. Next to my guy, who is super masculine, and both handsome and beautiful, Terry Glenn is a girl. And not even a pretty one.

The only player I would look twice at in the real world (if I were ten years younger and single, that is) is Lawyer Milloy.

That man has the goods.

And he's almost as sexy as my husband.

So Parcells was right when he called Terry she

 

[Juke99]

25 yrs old... I think that falls into the age range we'll be checking out at the Riviera...humm

Well then, I am double the man you are looking for.

 

[LaTunaNostra]

Also a side note, i dont know about texas but here in PA there is no such thing as alimony anymore. and spousal support is granted only in rare cases where one person did not work at all and the other has a high paying job.

So my advice in this day and age would be dont put your career on hold for your spouse unless you really dont want to work, or you are doing it for your kids. because if you just do it out of courtesy for your spouse you may be screwed later if you end up in divorce.

Well, it isn't putting it on "hold" for most couples.

It's just putting one career first. It's impossible to be totally 'equal' in that regrad.

Sometimes what is good for one's career is not good for another. That could be something as ordinary as working hours, and sometimes as important as relocation.

For a man to really get ahead, he needs support, not competition in the home.
I'm a traditionalist about that...and never had a problem putting him first professionally.

At the same time, he always puts me first. What I want, what I need, what I think, what I feel.

That decision has provided me with a nice lifestyle and obviously too much leisure time, (I don't have to work at all anymore if I don't want to..but I'd been told if do "retire", I'd better find a more productive way to spend time then here, lmao), but it's never about the lifestyle as much as that when you love some one so much, you always put him or her before yourself.

It's as natural as breathing to do so. You automatically think 'him' first.

Marriage is the greatest institution ever invented, imo...because it brings out the best in us, our most loving, unselfish, generous selves. When two people are both thinking of the other one first, how can it go wrong?

It only backfires when one is a giver, one a taker.

For two givers, it really can be heaven on earth.

 

[LaTunaNostra]

So Parcells was right when he called Terry she

I wouldn't go that far.

And I think Bill has a crush on her myself.

 

[LaTunaNostra]

I dont necessarily think a couple thats been together for a long time and are seemingly happy should split up because one cheated on the other. Its hard to find someone you can stand to be around every day, and then its even rarer if that same person enjoys your company enough to live with you day in and out. I mean, why is sex such a big deal, for most of us we werent virgins when we met our spouses so the idea that someone had sex with someone else, well to me its not the end of the world as long as they are willing to come clean and discuss everything and then you can move on from there.

Now if it turns out that the person is lying and manipulative and just a cheater by nature, well that is different than someone who loves you and just screwed up, i think.

Well, different strokes for different folks, Hoov.

I am a Roman Catholic (my entire schooling was Jesuit), married to a Muslim (not a practicing one per se, but the cultural values sure sunk in good).

"Cheating" in our relationship wouldn't be what it is to most couples, as it would signify loss of love, faith in each other, trust, commitment.

No one knows if their marriage could survive infidelity until it 'happens'.

I just hope I never have to find out, and I hope neither does anyone else here.

 

[Hoov]

Well, different strokes for different folks, Hoov.

I am a Roman Catholic (my entire schooling was Jesuit), married to a Muslim (not a practicing one per se, but the cultural values sure sunk in good).

"Cheating" in our relationship wouldn't be what it is to most couples, as it would signify loss of love, faith in each other, trust, commitment.

No one knows if their marriage could survive infidelity until it 'happens'.

I just hope I never have to find out, and I hope neither does anyone else here.

I dont think you will have to find out, im sure you and hubby are fine. and i think that is wonderful because you are happy, which is really the point of life anyway.

I really wouldn't have guessed roman catholic for you, thought you were a deadhead, hippie type LOL, guess cause you commented bout the band once.

 

[CowboyPrincess]

Well, different strokes for different folks, Hoov.


No one knows if their marriage could survive infidelity until it 'happens'.

Now days, it isn't just if the marriage will survive, but if you will physically survive. AIDS has changed the whole infidelity thing. Not only are you disrespecting the person you choose to love, honor and cherrish until death you do part.. but you are also putting them in risk of contracting a deadly virus for your little fling. The ol standbys are still there.. herpes and the other STD's.

So, for me it is buh bye... or as I like to say..

I've counted to three and said my piece.. no changing my mind about it after I've done that

 

[MapleLeaf]

I'm a widow. Wanna here something funny... I picked Veteran's Day because I knew how bad men can be about remembering dates. He could forget my Birthday, but he would never forget Veterans Day cuz he was a veteran... Worked like a charm.. LMAO

...my condolences on your loss. As a humurous aside I have that particular problem also - the one with remembering dates. I can't remember the birthdays of my three children or the day I got married with the exception of my second son who ruined our Christmas by popping out the chute on Christmas Eve.

In honour of the situation his middle name is Emmanuel. The majority of my time is spent at work with this site being my only hobby. Family doesn't come second, but there's a fine line between home and work and I seem to lose sight of it.

For my wife this wasn't alot of fun so I made a deal with her. I asked her to stay home with the children as a way to support my career ambitions. To sweeten this deal I decided to pass my paycheck over to her as an appreciation of her work at home.

As I said earlier our marriage gets better each and every year, alot of this may be due to the fact that I have had a raise the past five years in excess of 15% of my salary. It might not be me, but rather the paycheck.