All she has be doing for last few months is to try and hurt me. I'm not giving her the satisfaction. I also wonder if hearing me say the marriage was over was not what she really wanted to hear...anyways her loss.
And eventually another, more deserving, woman's gain. You are willing to work at marriage and that is exactly what it is, work. Can be the hardest work we ever do.
My wife worked at about 70% of our marriage and I pulled my 30% until I began to realize what she was doing and I kicked myself in the butt and got into gear.
I've read a couple of posts in this thread about guys that have given up after some rocky relationships which only serves to remind me how great I had it and how lucky I was. I can relate to T-RO and Calico because I am a loner and being alone isn't bad, being lonely is. I gave up on finding another even close to my wife after I lost her but I am probably a lot older that they are and can handle this but there are times my heart hurts to have a woman to talk with and share laughter, which is what my wife and I did. I miss that more than anything else but to find another like her seems to be an impossible task. When people ask me about us, I always tell them the same thing and they look at me for a minute and it dawns on them what that means. "We could sit in each other's presence and not have to fill the silence". We were not alone together.
Ya know there are worse things than being lonely, being lonely when you are with someone is far worse and that's why I don't even bother. And I am in a target rich environment, the ratio of women to men here is at 5 to 1 and I've been hit on at the freakin' HEB. I can't give them what they're looking for and they can't give me what I need. My family and friends finally stopped their "urging" me to at least see what's out there but I don't have the energy to search for that pearl in a sea of oysters.
When you get older, there is something we all have to do, become resigned to where we are in life. That may sound like giving up, but it is not. It's the conscious decision not to swim against the current.
