Boys bully a 68 year old bus monitor

[AbeBeta]

1) Claims that spanking teaches aggression seem unfounded.
2) Other factors mediate the link. Maybe not culture, in this case.

You could say that about any correlational research study. Also, mediate is not the correct term for what you are talking about.

3) based on the literature review, detrimental outcomes were primarily due to overly frequent use of physical punishment (insert abuse here). But wait, there is more, detrimental outcomes have been found for every alternative disciplinary tactic when investigated with similar analyses.

No, based on the literature review detrimental outcomes were more strongly associated with great abuse. What the study does do is provide a very narrow set of conditions under which spanking does not appear to produce negative outcomes. The idea that all of those conditions are met by parents who spank is ludicrous. What this article does suggest is that someone who used spanking should have to take a parenting course to understand the situations under which it could be applied without harmful outcomes.

4) The burgeoning field of cultural neuroscience is finding that culture influences brain development,

You can read the articles any way you want to. But there is enough evidence to suggest that the link you are desperately to is not direct and definitive as you are claiming it to be.

You again fail to understand that the fact the culture influences brain development in no way is evidence that culture MODERATES (that was the word you used incorrectly before) the influence of physical abuse on brain development.

BTW, from the article that you claim that i miss understood.

You mean from the entirely speculative conclusion? You mean where they make clear that physical discipline was related to adjustment problems across the board?

Caution must be exercised in applying these findings, however, because despite the attenuated link, more frequent use of physical discipline was associated with more adjustment problems, even when it was perceived as being normative.

I don't know how much more clarity you need than that.

I'm really done with this. It's been fun having a somewhat cordial discussion with you.

Yes, as I have had fun reading all of your mistaken interpretations and misuse of terminology.

 

[ethiostar]

Yes, as I have had fun reading all of your mistaken interpretations and misuse of terminology.

Wow.....that's what I get for trying to end the discussion in a diplomatic and somewhat positive way.

Great job showing your colors until the end.

Thanks for the myopic, conceited, arrogant, and pompous, load of BS.

 

[TellerMorrow34]

Ahhh the ignore function.

Greatest internet invention of all time.



As for spankings to each their own. I have no problem with parents who spank and I have no problem with parents who don't spank.

Everyone has their own way that they believe is the best and that's all parents can be asked to do is to be the best parent they can be.


I rarely ever spank my children. Of course I'm pretty dang lucky in that I have two wonderful children who are extremely well behaved and I don't have to spank them. It's been more than 10 years since I've had to spank my daughter and a long, long, long time since I had to spank my son.



It's pretty rare that I do it, or have to do it, but I know this. I got my butt ***** the hell out when I was a kid when I behaved poorly.


I got spanked with belts, wood paddles, switches, wood spoons, fly swatters, whatever was handy.


And here's the really crazy thing about all that. I've never been an overly aggressive person because of it. I don't go around 'beating' people because I think beating people is the way to go. I don't have authority issues or problems in my life.


Funny how I got spanked for being a brat at times as a child and yet didn't turn into some raging idiot because of it like so many folks try and tell you absolutely will happen.


And on the flip side of that coin I've got family, and friends, who never got spanked for being in trouble. They got time outs and grounded and they're *GASP* well adjusted and good people and good parents as well.


Interesting how life works that way with more than one way working.

 

[ethiostar]

Ahhh the ignore function.

Greatest internet invention of all time.



As for spankings to each their own. I have no problem with parents who spank and I have no problem with parents who don't spank.

Everyone has their own way that they believe is the best and that's all parents can be asked to do is to be the best parent they can be.


I rarely ever spank my children. Of course I'm pretty dang lucky in that I have two wonderful children who are extremely well behaved and I don't have to spank them. It's been more than 10 years since I've had to spank my daughter and a long, long, long time since I had to spank my son.



It's pretty rare that I do it, or have to do it, but I know this. I got my butt ***** the hell out when I was a kid when I behaved poorly.


I got spanked with belts, wood paddles, switches, wood spoons, fly swatters, whatever was handy.


And here's the really crazy thing about all that. I've never been an overly aggressive person because of it. I don't go around 'beating' people because I think beating people is the way to go. I don't have authority issues or problems in my life.


Funny how I got spanked for being a brat at times as a child and yet didn't turn into some raging idiot because of it like so many folks try and tell you absolutely will happen.


And on the flip side of that coin I've got family, and friends, who never got spanked for being in trouble. They got time outs and grounded and they're *GASP* well adjusted and good people and good parents as well.


Interesting how life works that way with more than one way working.

It just goes to show you there are many factors that come in to play.

Parents that I know, including myself, have many tools that we utilize. Most are not against a quick pop on the butt when everything else doesn't seem to work. To be honest, I personally have found "timeout" works well most of the time for most things.

My nieces and nephews were raised the same way. The majority of those who are out of high school finished on the honor roll and have moved on to college on academic scholarships. They are all, those in college and those still in HS, very loving and well adjusted kids.

 

[AbeBeta]

Wow.....that's what I get for trying to end the discussion in a diplomatic and somewhat positive way.

Great job showing your colors until the end.

Thanks for the myopic, conceited, arrogant, and pompous, load of BS.

So you don't like being called out for using terms that you clearly do not understand fully?

 

[Idgit]

It just goes to show you there are many factors that come in to play.

Parents that I know, including myself, have many tools that we utilize. Most are not against a quick pop on the butt when everything else doesn't seem to work. To be honest, I personally have found "timeout" works well most of the time for most things.

My nieces and nephews were raised the same way. The majority of those who are out of high school finished on the honor roll and have moved on to college on academic scholarships. They are all, those in college and those still in HS, very loving and well adjusted kids.

If I do say so myself, we're outstanding parents. Strangers stop us in stores to tell us how polite and confident our boys are. Other parents come to us regularly for help when they're thrown up their hands completely. My boys are probably the biggest source of pride in my life. They're happy, respectful, diligent, funny, and hard-working. They stick up for people who are getting treated poorly and for themselves when they have to.

Both of them were spanked regularly early in situations where safety or blatant parental disrespect were at issue. Neither of them have been spanked in years. We hand out pushups now, to enforce proper behavior or when one or both shows significant disrespect to the other. Our house is peaceful, loving, and quiet.

People who are against spanking are either not doing it properly, or they aren't parents so they don't know what they're talking about. I don't care what books say on the topic, one way or another. Kids need love, structure, respect and discipline. And it needs to be consistent. The rest is talking about different means to the same end.

 

[AbeBeta]

If I do say so myself, we're outstanding parents. ....

People who are against spanking are either not doing it properly, or they aren't parents so they don't know what they're talking about. I don't care what books say on the topic, one way or another. Kids need love, structure, respect and discipline. And it needs to be consistent. The rest is talking about different means to the same end.

Any person who thinks of themselves as an outstanding parent is obviously not a parent. Any good parent knows that if you think of yourself as "outstanding" then you are shutting yourself off to any of improvement. Any parent can be better. Thinking that you are great at it is more about ignorance than reality.

The idea that discipline must come in a physical form is just plain misguided. I see how you earned your name.

 

[Trendnet]

Ahhh the ignore function.

Greatest internet invention of all time.



As for spankings to each their own. I have no problem with parents who spank and I have no problem with parents who don't spank.

Everyone has their own way that they believe is the best and that's all parents can be asked to do is to be the best parent they can be.


I rarely ever spank my children. Of course I'm pretty dang lucky in that I have two wonderful children who are extremely well behaved and I don't have to spank them. It's been more than 10 years since I've had to spank my daughter and a long, long, long time since I had to spank my son.



It's pretty rare that I do it, or have to do it, but I know this. I got my butt ***** the hell out when I was a kid when I behaved poorly.


I got spanked with belts, wood paddles, switches, wood spoons, fly swatters, whatever was handy.


And here's the really crazy thing about all that. I've never been an overly aggressive person because of it. I don't go around 'beating' people because I think beating people is the way to go. I don't have authority issues or problems in my life.


Funny how I got spanked for being a brat at times as a child and yet didn't turn into some raging idiot because of it like so many folks try and tell you absolutely will happen.


And on the flip side of that coin I've got family, and friends, who never got spanked for being in trouble. They got time outs and grounded and they're *GASP* well adjusted and good people and good parents as well.


Interesting how life works that way with more than one way working.

Awesome... your purely antecdotal evidence is all I need!

 

[YosemiteSam]

Any person who thinks of themselves as an outstanding parent is obviously not a parent. Any good parent knows that if you think of yourself as "outstanding" then you are shutting yourself off to any of improvement. Any parent can be better. Thinking that you are great at it is more about ignorance than reality.

The idea that discipline must come in a physical form is just plain misguided. I see how you earned your name.

You are being a bit too argumentative here. It seems you just want to bicker rather than debate. Your statement above was pointless and incorrect. Just because someone thinks they do an outstanding job of something, doesn't mean they don't think they can improve. He did say "outstanding" and not "perfect". Perfect would imply that there is no room for improvement.

 

[AbeBeta]

You are being a bit too argumentative here. It seems you just want to bicker rather than debate. Your statement above was pointless and incorrect. Just because someone thinks they do an outstanding job of something, doesn't mean they don't think they can improve. He did say "outstanding" and not "perfect". Perfect would imply that there is no room for improvement.

The poster implied that if you don't spank that you know nothing about parenting.

That is straight up BS.

 

[rocboy22]

You are being a bit too argumentative here. It seems you just want to bicker rather than debate. Your statement above was pointless and incorrect. Just because someone thinks they do an outstanding job of something, doesn't mean they don't think they can improve. He did say "outstanding" and not "perfect". Perfect would imply that there is no room for improvement.

this....

 

[rocboy22]

The poster implied that if you don't spank that you know nothing about parenting.

That is straight up BS.

yes, that part was BS

 

[JBond]

Wow.....that's what I get for trying to end the discussion in a diplomatic and somewhat positive way.

Great job showing your colors until the end.

Thanks for the myopic, conceited, arrogant, and pompous, load of BS.

I left the conversation back on the first day when ABE went nuts saying we do more than a occasional lite tap to the rear and he knew for a fact we were lying and abusing our children. His comments were flat out stupid. Clearly he is trying to overcompensate...who knows for what.

 

[AbeBeta]

I left the conversation back on the first day when ABE went nuts saying we do more than a occasional lite tap to the rear and he knew for a fact we were lying and abusing our children. His comments were flat out stupid. Clearly he is trying to overcompensate...who knows for what.

Me thinks you protest too much

 

[WV Cowboy]

Me thinks you protest too much

He hasn't posted in this thread in 3 days !:laugh2:

 

[AbeBeta]

He hasn't posted in this thread in 3 days !:laugh2:

That was about the suggest that I'm over compensating. The idea that someone who feels it is ok to hit a three year old feels that someone else is over compensating is what I found laughable.

 

[WV Cowboy]

That was about the suggest that I'm over compensating. The idea that someone who feels it is ok to hit a three year old feels that someone else is over compensating is what I found laughable.

OK, I gotcha.

 

[ScipioCowboy]

If I do say so myself, we're outstanding parents. Strangers stop us in stores to tell us how polite and confident our boys are. Other parents come to us regularly for help when they're thrown up their hands completely. My boys are probably the biggest source of pride in my life. They're happy, respectful, diligent, funny, and hard-working. They stick up for people who are getting treated poorly and for themselves when they have to.

Both of them were spanked regularly early in situations where safety or blatant parental disrespect were at issue. Neither of them have been spanked in years. We hand out pushups now, to enforce proper behavior or when one or both shows significant disrespect to the other. Our house is peaceful, loving, and quiet.

People who are against spanking are either not doing it properly, or they aren't parents so they don't know what they're talking about. I don't care what books say on the topic, one way or another. Kids need love, structure, respect and discipline. And it needs to be consistent. The rest is talking about different means to the same end.

I've never met your children, but I don't doubt for a moment that you are outstanding parents. Truly outstanding.

Because, like all good parents, you understand that it's a process. You have to keep stacking good instances of parenting on top of good instances parenting. Because that's part of the process. Parenting is about stacking...and processes.

I venture you also set boundaries and deadlines for your children. They understand that their chores must be done by 3:15, Sunday afternoon. That's 3:15, Sunday afternoon.

You also videotape your interactions with your children. That way, you can go back and watch the tape and see if there's anything you can improve upon. If someone has a specific question, you go back and watch the tape so you can give them the best possible answer and so you can improve as a parent. And you keep the tapes stacked on top of each other for easier access.

It's all part of the process.

 

[ethiostar]

I've never met your children, but I don't doubt for a moment that you are outstanding parents. Truly outstanding.

Because, like all good parents, you understand that it's a process. You have to keep stacking good instances of parenting on top of good instances parenting. Because that's part of the process. Parenting is about stacking...and processes.

I venture you also set boundaries and deadlines for your children. They understand that their chores must be done by 3:15, Sunday afternoon. That's 3:15, Sunday afternoon.

You also videotape your interactions with your children. That way, you can go back and watch the tape and see if there's anything you can improve upon. If someone has a specific question, you go back and watch the tape so you can give them the best possible answer and so you can improve as a parent. And you keep the tapes stacked on top of each other for easier access.

It's all part of the process.

:laugh2:

 

[JBond]

He hasn't posted in this thread in 3 days !:laugh2:

Nothing worse than an intellectually lazy do-gooder that resorts to mind reading to support his position. There is little point in discussing things with people like that.

We all make mistakes, so hopefully he will come to his senses and realize how stupid his accusation sounded.