Morning Pops!

Discussion in 'Members Zone' started by Sarge, Aug 14, 2009.

  1. GrammaJan

    GrammaJan Well-Known Member

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    I am familiar with that quote, and that’s kind of where I am.

    My whole family is in my geographical area (except my daughter’s family). Mom, son’s family, siblings… you get the idea. Feel like I’m here for when they need something from me (sitter, money/loans, legal ‘advice’ (more looking for guidance because I am not a lawyer, and I don’t play one on tv, but I do work in a law office). I’m certainly USED, and have allowed it because I LOVE helping and taking care of people. That’s on me, and I’m finding family generally takes advantage of that.

    Currently doing training modules for a volunteer position with a very respectable organization and will do orientation next week. Hoping it helps. Right now it’s like I’m a lone crab trying to crawl out of a bucket of negative crabs… that inevitably keep grabbing me and pulling me back down into the bucket.
     
  2. CouchCoach

    CouchCoach Moderator

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    Be the smart crab. Hang back while they exclaim "hey, look, a hot tub. C'mon everybody".
     
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  3. Xelda

    Xelda Well-Known Member

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    Yes, and the mess is sitting in my living room waiting to be unboxed. Crazy ksk, we love you.
     
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  4. Runwildboys

    Runwildboys Well-Known Member

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    You can view it as being "used", or you can view it as being "needed". If that's the only time you hear from them, cut 'em off and see how they react...or tell them you'd like to hear from them when they don't just want something from you, and see how they react.
     
  5. CouchCoach

    CouchCoach Moderator

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    I'd bet they do not know how Jan feels because she hasn't told them.

    We all get taken for granted sometimes and take others for granted as well. And most of the time it is out of ignorance of how they are feeling, it's not intentional. Because we/they do not tell others enough about how we are feeling.

    I do not know why that is but when I was in a dark place I finally called on others to walk me out of it. I kept telling people I was OK and lying.

    Hell, we don't live in the world, we live in an abundance of worlds and we each have our own little world and several that circle out of that. We need to allow others to come into ours and venture into theirs.

    Best example of this for me was when Mike lost his wife to the same monster that took mine. I had been languishing in my world half the time in a zombie state of mind. He needed my help and through my helping him, I helped myself. And he got real needy but I found that I really liked being needed. And the only really important thing is how I feel about myself, not what others think.

    Jan is feeling what a lot of us feel with our families "they think I exist for them". Is that what I am? A reflection of them?

    I hope she realizes that they care and feel a lot more for her than she's feeling right now. If they knew how she felt, she might be surprised at their response.
     
  6. Runwildboys

    Runwildboys Well-Known Member

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    My thoughts exactly... except for the whole "Mike" thing. I've never met the man...but I believe you!

    I do my best to make sure I'm not taking advantage of anyone. I'm pretty sure I could ask for help with things that would just be a little easier with their assistance, but if I don't absolutely need it, I'm not going to risk making any family or friends feel like a means to an end. I think that's what happens when you grow up watching someone take advantage at every opportunity, so it's a blessing and a curse.
     
  7. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

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    Don't let the kids near it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
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  8. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

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    Try permethrin instead of crab attractant.
     
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  9. Xelda

    Xelda Well-Known Member

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    I'm so glad you like to feel needed, Coachadoodles. Because we need you. :grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin:
     
  10. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

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    I cried a tear. You wiped it dry.
    I was confused. You cleared my mind.
    I sold my soul. You bought it back for me.
    You held me up. And gave me dignity.
     
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  11. Runwildboys

    Runwildboys Well-Known Member

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    Liar
     
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  12. Xelda

    Xelda Well-Known Member

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    How was I to know you were a poet, ksk? That was beautiful, but I believe it belongs to a much higher power.
     
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  13. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

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    That was from an Ann Murray song.
     
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  14. kskboys

    kskboys Well-Known Member

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    I was drunk. But, I might have done those things!!!
     
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  15. Bobhaze

    Bobhaze Moderator

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    I’m a little behind on catching up with my friends here…Jan first of all, I understand. Sometimes life isn’t what we signed up for or what a lot of TV shows act like it should be. Some days the only good part of it is an ice cream cone. In fact, I recommend one for you sometime soon!
     
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2022
  16. Montanalo

    Montanalo Well-Known Member

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    Good Thursday morning Pops and Friends,

    I failed to share earlier that I spent the previous week in Belize diving. Not only was the diving spectacular, but the remoteness meant no cell or internet for a week. It was a bit unsettling at first, but I think I benefitted from less social media and news.

    The point is, we all need time to get away and recharge... hope you make the time to do so this summer.
     
  17. GrammaJan

    GrammaJan Well-Known Member

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    Lol, the irony in that is I don't really do dairy because of health issues, but do allow myself the occasional cheat. I'll bank that one.
     
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  18. GrammaJan

    GrammaJan Well-Known Member

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    Wish I could afford to even take the lessons to go diving...
     
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  19. Runwildboys

    Runwildboys Well-Known Member

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    Lessons? Who needs lessons? Going deep underwater for long periods of time, breathing through a rubber tube is the most natural thing you can do!
     
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  20. GrammaJan

    GrammaJan Well-Known Member

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    you’d think… I mean, I saw them do that countless times on Gilligan’s Island with a bamboo tube…
     
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