Morning Pops and all y’all.
Well, I guess it’s time for an update and I just passed the 18 month mark last Wednesday and 12 months past my expiration date. Not to be confused with my best used by date, which I am sure is in the rear view mirror now.
Saw the oncologist last Thursday to go over labs and as soon as I got home the bilirubin monster struck accompanied by the worst rigors I’ve had to date.
They got me back in for new labs and all the liver function numbers were high with the bilirubin leading the parade and my skin and eyes yellowing rapidly and the incessant and maddening itching already in rare form.
But just like what happened the last two times, this began clearing itself Saturday morning and the next labs revealed the bilirubin had dropped from 6.1 to 1.0. My body had once again began fixing the problem but high is considered above .2 so some of the itching is still present.
I assume some of you might be curious about what’s going on because I am not here near as much as I used to be and I want to give you permission to ask anytime. I don’t bring it up as much as I used to because I don’t want to turn Pop’s thread into that but this thread is more about the people of this site than any other for me.
I am still possessing a positive mind and spirit, which I am certain got me through this last episode but have begun to believe I’ve always had the positive spirit but tried to control that with my mind.
I wonder how many more like me are there? I think there are many with too much emphasis on the need to know and not enough on the need to just feel.
The main thing I celebrate and lament about is that I can no longer remember me before all of this started in June, 2021. I lament taking all of that for granted, no speculative expiration date except for the insurance company’s and IRS.
However, I celebrate the release from the comfortably numbness I had settled into and that not caring whether I lived or died. The irony is someone had to tell me I was going to die for me to care about living.
I miss you guys, we need to get the Morning Pops band back together.