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Xelda

Xelda

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Xelda

Xelda

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Good afternoon Pops, Coachadoodles and all my rowdy Popsadoodles. I've had one of those mornings. You know the one. It's when someone has the audacity to knock on my door at the crack of dawn. I get up and there's no one there. I know I wasn't dreaming! Any who, I got back to sleep after a late, late, late night to have the plumber's office call and ask me if the plumbers can come over in 15 minutes. I mean, I'm exhausted, got beat with a dumass stick most of the night and need to bathe. I set up an appointment for afternoon but they're wanting to catch me before I can think. I'm two large doses of caffeine in and just now wondering what happened. I guess that's awake in some people's book.

I don't think I've regaled y'all with my epic plumber saga. I ordered two toilets off Home Depot. It was an arduous task of choosing the right and asthetically pleasing toilets. I wanted exactly what mine were not. I was sorely tempted to order a high end one with a remote control, seat warmer, heated water for the bohinney and then blow it dry. I just didn't want to risk an electrician walking through the door and ripping my head off, so I kept it pretty simple. Just two nice toilets. Come to find out, these are magic commodes. The first plumber was in the next room secretly cursing my existence. Second toilet was broken, so installation was delayed.

Plumber two comes out and spends an hour looking at the new potty and talking to his boss. The universal consensus was this pot is the one that says "you must have a Masters Degree in throne installation" to touch me. So, I've got the black belts of plumbing running around avoiding me right now. KATO? Third trip's the charm, right? I need a nap.
 
Runwildboys

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Xelda said:
Good afternoon Pops, Coachadoodles and all my rowdy Popsadoodles. I've had one of those mornings. You know the one. It's when someone has the audacity to knock on my door at the crack of dawn. I get up and there's no one there. I know I wasn't dreaming! Any who, I got back to sleep after a late, late, late night to have the plumber's office call and ask me if the plumbers can come over in 15 minutes. I mean, I'm exhausted, got beat with a dumass stick most of the night and need to bathe. I set up an appointment for afternoon but they're wanting to catch me before I can think. I'm two large doses of caffeine in and just now wondering what happened. I guess that's awake in some people's book.

I don't think I've regaled y'all with my epic plumber saga. I ordered two toilets off Home Depot. It was an arduous task of choosing the right and asthetically pleasing toilets. I wanted exactly what mine were not. I was sorely tempted to order a high end one with a remote control, seat warmer, heated water for the bohinney and then blow it dry. I just didn't want to risk an electrician walking through the door and ripping my head off, so I kept it pretty simple. Just two nice toilets. Come to find out, these are magic commodes. The first plumber was in the next room secretly cursing my existence. Second toilet was broken, so installation was delayed.

Plumber two comes out and spends an hour looking at the new potty and talking to his boss. The universal consensus was this pot is the one that says "you must have a Masters Degree in throne installation" to touch me. So, I've got the black belts of plumbing running around avoiding me right now. KATO? Third trip's the charm, right? I need a nap.
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Tell me they're not being installed by Home Depot employees!
 
Xelda

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The job is finally finished and I've caught up on my lost sleep. I do have an amusing story to follow up this adventure. I thought I'd go uptown and had a bidet installed on my magic toilet. I've never met one before, so the curiosity was cranked to high. After they left, I sashayed back to said bidet and decided to play with it. I turned the button one way and a rod came out to spray me. I panicked and turned it too far the other way. This rod receded and another rod came out to greet me with equal fervor. I turned it too hard and that rod receded only to have the first come back to get me again. It took a little while to get things straight, but I ended up soaked and laughing at myself.
 
Runwildboys

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Xelda said:
The job is finally finished and I've caught up on my lost sleep. I do have an amusing story to follow up this adventure. I thought I'd go uptown and had a bidet installed on my magic toilet. I've never met one before, so the curiosity was cranked to high. After they left, I sashayed back to said bidet and decided to play with it. I turned the button one way and a rod came out to spray me. I panicked and turned it too far the other way. This rod receded and another rod came out to greet me with equal fervor. I turned it too hard and that rod receded only to have the first come back to get me again. It took a little while to get things straight, but I ended up soaked and laughing at myself.
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Okay, I typed out something a little graphic, involving a balloon, but that may be over the line, so...enjoy your bidet!
 
Xelda

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Montanalo said:
"you must have a Masters Degree in throne installation"

I know the feeling.
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I told those plumbers to come get me if they needed bossing around. They didn't seek me out, but left my home looking thoroughly worn out. It's very satisfying when you've worked someone half to death at the end of the day.
 
Runwildboys

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Xelda said:
I told those plumbers to come get me if they needed bossing around. They didn't seek me out, but left my home looking thoroughly worn out. It's very satisfying when you've worked someone half to death at the end of the day.
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Especially someone you don't have to tip!
 
Xelda

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Good afternoon Pops, Coachadoodles and Popsadoodles! Not much going on until my next plumber's episode.

My hair continues to grow out and, outside of the roots, is allergic to my scalp. Garfunkel beat Simon off my head and planted his flag somewhere in the back of my head. I can feel the curls going separate directions back there. I want that exquisite voice, but noooooo... just the hair. Bummer.
 
Runwildboys

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Xelda said:
Good afternoon Pops, Coachadoodles and Popsadoodles! Not much going on until my next plumber's episode.

My hair continues to grow out and, outside of the roots, is allergic to my scalp. Garfunkel beat Simon off my head and planted his flag somewhere in the back of my head. I can feel the curls going separate directions back there. I want that exquisite voice, but noooooo... just the hair. Bummer.
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Hey, hair is hair! At least, being a woman, you can have it styled however you want.
 
Xelda

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I got one for y'all. My brother got a passport last year. He went on a cruise that put him in Canada. He was so excited to get a stamp in his passport. They did it electronically, but.he kept asking for a stamp, so they told him where the post office is. He also said Canada looks like Louisiana. Disappointing, eh?
 
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