Opposite Sex Friends

[rkell87]

Whether you trust your spouse in a particular situation doesn't make that situation socially normal or acceptable.

I trust my wife to sit in a room full of naked men. Do I want her sitting in that situation? Is it acceptable for her to want to sit in that situation? No.

so what? you aren't talking about the subject at hand, once again. yes it is socially normal and acceptable for Platonic friends to to hang out with or without there spouse(don't go on a tangent on whether people can be Platonic, they aren't doing it, they aren't pursuing it, its Platonic).

sitting in a room full of naked men has nothing to do with close friends of the opposite sex.

 

[Cowboyslife]

so what? you aren't talking about the subject at hand, once again. yes it is socially normal and acceptable for Platonic friends to to hang out with or without there spouse(don't go on a tangent on whether people can be Platonic, they aren't doing it, they aren't pursuing it, its Platonic).

sitting in a room full of naked men has nothing to do with close friends of the opposite sex.

Unless they're swingers.

 

[rkell87]

Unless they're swingers.

touche

 

[theogt]

so what? you aren't talking about the subject at hand, once again. yes it is socially normal and acceptable for Platonic friends to to hang out with or without there spouse(don't go on a tangent on whether people can be Platonic, they aren't doing it, they aren't pursuing it, its Platonic).

sitting in a room full of naked men has nothing to do with close friends of the opposite sex.

You kept making a point about trust. And I was showing that trust was largely irrelevant.

 

[rkell87]

You kept making a point about trust. And I was showing that trust was largely irrelevant.

imo you failed. and are wrong

 

[theogt]

Bottomline, you can admit that someone is attractive and have no inkling of trying to hook up with them.

You have no "inkling" because you lack the means and opportunity.

 

[theogt]

imo you failed. and are wrong

No, I showed that trust was irrelevant. That much is certain. Whether you choose to ignore it, is another question. Feel free to do so.

 

[Cowboyslife]

You have no "inkling" because you lack the means and opportunity.

What the hell is your deal?

 

[rkell87]

No, I showed that trust was irrelevant. That much is certain. Whether you choose to ignore it, is another question. Feel free to do so.

ok lets go with the naked men thing, i trust that my GF wouldnt be in that situation, and trust that she wouldnt want to be. so trust is relevant.

 

[Dallas]

What the hell is your deal?

Umm do you see the nightmare of a carousel ride you just paid for? I get my shots in and get out. Once vindicated, the rest is just spin to save face.

If you can't dazzle them w/ brilliance......well.....baffle them with BS, right?

 

[Cowboyslife]

Umm do you see the nightmare of a carousel ride you just paid for? I get my shots in and get out. Once vindicated, the rest is just spin to save face.

If you can't dazzle them w/ brilliance......well.....baffle them with BS, right?

Disagreement is one thing, but right now I feel like I'm taking jabs below the belt from a midget in the ring.

 

[SaltwaterServr]

http://i36.***BLOCKED***/albums/e42/MihoshiK/spacebattles/74100-grandpa-simpson.gif

 

[DallasCowboysRule!]

If you weren't the one wanting it to be more, the other person was. Guaranteed.

Fact. I've never had a female friend when one or the other didn't want it to go further. There have even been situations where I was interested in only friendship and seriously believed she felt the same way only to find out some time later that she did in fact want more than just friendship.

 

[Teren_Kanan]

ok lets go with the naked men thing, i trust that my GF wouldnt be in that situation, and trust that she wouldnt want to be. so trust is relevant.

Can someone put the room of naked me into context for me? Is your GF just going to be sitting in the middle looking around? Or is it orgy time?
When I read it I put it into the context of like a male strip club. Lots of naked men. And I would have no problem with my GF being in one, and no problem with her wanting to be.

 

[Teren_Kanan]

Fact. I've never had a female friend when one or the other didn't want it to go further. There have even been situations where I was interested in only friendship and seriously believed she felt the same way only to find out some time later that she did in fact want more than just friendship.

Yes but wanting something doesn't necessarily mean intent to get it. I "want" to sleep with several of my female friends, but I wouldn't do it.

I'm not saying you're incorrect, I'm saying that you being right shouldn't matter or stop 2 people from having a platonic relationship, regardless of whether or not they want more.

 

[Go Big D!]

Yes it is possible. Some of my best friends are guys.
I even sleep with them every 3rd night and have never had sex with any of them :laugh2:

 

[kristie]

It is entirely possible but you have to have two very understanding people. My wife and I discussed this early on in our marriage. In all honesty we agreed to even allow the other to be attracted to someone of the opposite sex. In other words, if I say Kate Beckinsale is gorgeous it does not mean I want a divorce and to jump into bed with her. It means I am not blind. Same thing if she says that of a man. We allow ourselves to look at the opposite sex as long as it is not by braille. In a very short time we learned to trust each other and not to believe attraction means lust.

In other words, yes it can be accomplished but you nor she can secretly be calculating how to cheat, not get cheated on, and not get caught. As soon as you start making moves on the friend of the opposite sex you have sanctified the very essence of this question.

Most of my friends are sports freaks, but I do have some friends that are female. My wife knows I will never cheat on her. Not with them or anyone. I earned that trust. That is the key.

my husband & i are the same way.

 

[casmith07]

Alright this thread has devolved...I'm going to get it back on track once I get to my laptop.

 

[JohnnyHopkins]

Fact. I've never had a female friend when one or the other didn't want it to go further. There have even been situations where I was interested in only friendship and seriously believed she felt the same way only to find out some time later that she did in fact want more than just friendship.

This is actually a testiment to why I see no reason to give up my two female friends. I have known them for over twenty years since we were in Grade-School. Both friendships span five years longer than my relationship with my wife. We have been friends while being single and during relationships. They have seen me at my best and worst. We just aren't into each other in that way. One of them flew up after our first child was born to visit and we had her stay over at our rental house the last time we were in Orlando. She is like family to me.

I can understand where people that have no such relationships can be skeptical, but that is only their opinion. Twenty-plus years is long enough for me to feel that I have made the right decision.

 

[ABQCOWBOY]

Well, I can honestly say that in my entire life, from the time I was a young kid, up to now, I have never been in any sort of relationship, be it girl friend or wife, where putting the Friendship of a female before or even on par with that of my partner, didn't cause trouble. Perhaps I just pick the wrong type. I don't know but it's never failed to create issues. In the past, I have made decisions not to put my relationship before personal friendships and those relationships pretty much ended.

Just how it is for me.