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GrammaJan

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I feel I need to respond if, for no other reason than I have been in your shoes. A good friend of mine - who is therapist - told me a long time ago that it is alright to be angry, it is alright to vent... provided it is focused, provided you know why your angry. And, above all, there is no need to be apologetic.

Wish I could offer you more words of wisdom and comfort.
Thank you
 

Cowboys_22

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Evening Pops and everyone.

Been an interesting couple of days. I'm going to vent here, not for sympathy, but out of shear anger and distress. Thursday starts with news that my close friend with the cancer in his sinus cavity (neuro blastoma) (this is my main battle buddy) had possibly fallen and been disoriented the night before and has slurred speech. The decision was made by Noon on Thursday to place him in hospice care being told he likely had less than 30 days (my heart starts breaking...). Wife is told to get the kids in to see him while he's still able to respond to them. Friday comes and he is totally unresponsive (my heart is now coming apart in pieces...). I know what's coming and it's coming fast. This morning I'm getting food ready for this weekend's get together with the daughter and getting ready to leave fur the airport to pick her and the beau up and I get the message my friend (his name is Mark, by the way... only fitting he has a name) has passed away (heart. shattered.) I can't even begin to tell you how important we were to each other in this journey. It wasn't supposed to end this way. Damned doctors know how to cure this monster and for the sake of the almighty $ they and the pharmaceutical companies just won't let it happen. There's too much money to be made and I'm so angry about being used as a guinea pig and countless lives being lost while others get rich. We were supposed to finish this fight together. Now I stand alone. EVERYONE I know with cancer has died but for myself and one other friend that just got her diagnosis. I don't mind saying the survivor's guilt is tough to bear and I don't know how to handle this. I think I need to talk to my doctor. I'm losing my mind.

I have to try to focus on tomorrow.

Sorry for the long vent. I needed to.

Goodnight all.

I give you a ‘like’. Not for the bad news but in support. 8 years ago my wife lost a sister to the dreaded disease. She left behind a husband and 2 young children. The youngest graduated from high school this year and is now attending college studying medicine. Family and friends came through in their hour of need.
In times like these we need someone to lean on. Nothing wrong with asking for help or venting. We all have needed it a time or two in our lives. Just don’t lose hope. Sometimes that’s all we have. You don’t stand alone, as much as possible we stand together. Prayers for you Jan
 

GrammaJan

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I give you a ‘like’. Not for the bad news but in support. 8 years ago my wife lost a sister to the dreaded disease. She left behind a husband and 2 young children. The youngest graduated from high school this year and is now attending college studying medicine. Family and friends came through in their hour of need.
In times like these we need someone to lean on. Nothing wrong with asking for help or venting. We all have needed it a time or two in our lives. Just don’t lose hope. Sometimes that’s all we have. You don’t stand alone, as much as possible we stand together. Prayers for you Jan
Thank you. I failed to mention Mark's daughter got married two weeks ago. He was able to attend with the help of a 'happy pill'. Also, two sons. One a freshman in high school and the other due to be married next year. Just so sad.
 

Xelda

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Ooh kay that's horrible, Jan. A gut punch and I'm so sorry to hear it. On the bright side of which we need to look, you've got family to keep you company as you cope with this news. It could be a Heavenly intervention for your sake. You need them right now. One of the problems with cancer and chemo is meeting and becoming friends with others in the same boat. Walking the hallways as people try to come to terms with the news. I agree 100% that the cures are out there and in my heart, I believe those fund raisers are designed to line some one's pocket over finding a cure. Pharmaceutical companies are the devil, himself. Take care of yourself as you walk this out.
 

GrammaJan

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Ooh kay that's horrible, Jan. A gut punch and I'm so sorry to hear it. On the bright side of which we need to look, you've got family to keep you company as you cope with this news. It could be a Heavenly intervention for your sake. You need them right now. One of the problems with cancer and chemo is meeting and becoming friends with others in the same boat. Walking the hallways as people try to come to terms with the news. I agree 100% that the cures are out there and in my heart, I believe those fund raisers are designed to line some one's pocket over finding a cure. Pharmaceutical companies are the devil, himself. Take care of yourself as you walk this out.
Yes ma'am
 

Xelda

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Yes ma'am
If only the rest were as well behaved as you.
giphy.gif

You are getting very sleepy. You will mind Xelda now.
 

Runwildboys

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Evening Pops and everyone.

Been an interesting couple of days. I'm going to vent here, not for sympathy, but out of shear anger and distress. Thursday starts with news that my close friend with the cancer in his sinus cavity (neuro blastoma) (this is my main battle buddy) had possibly fallen and been disoriented the night before and has slurred speech. The decision was made by Noon on Thursday to place him in hospice care being told he likely had less than 30 days (my heart starts breaking...). Wife is told to get the kids in to see him while he's still able to respond to them. Friday comes and he is totally unresponsive (my heart is now coming apart in pieces...). I know what's coming and it's coming fast. This morning I'm getting food ready for this weekend's get together with the daughter and getting ready to leave fur the airport to pick her and the beau up and I get the message my friend (his name is Mark, by the way... only fitting he has a name) has passed away (heart. shattered.) I can't even begin to tell you how important we were to each other in this journey. It wasn't supposed to end this way. Damned doctors know how to cure this monster and for the sake of the almighty $ they and the pharmaceutical companies just won't let it happen. There's too much money to be made and I'm so angry about being used as a guinea pig and countless lives being lost while others get rich. We were supposed to finish this fight together. Now I stand alone. EVERYONE I know with cancer has died but for myself and one other friend that just got her diagnosis. I don't mind saying the survivor's guilt is tough to bear and I don't know how to handle this. I think I need to talk to my doctor. I'm losing my mind.

I have to try to focus on tomorrow.

Sorry for the long vent. I needed to.

Goodnight all.
Jan, this is the place, and we're the people. I know I can speak for everyone when I say we're so sorry for your loss, and we're all here whenever you need us.

I hope you can somehow allow yourself to enjoy your family time, and give yourself permission to wait to grieve.
 

LeonDixson

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Morning, Pops and pen pals. It's game day and it's going to be interesting to see us go up against a competitive team in a hostile environment. It should be an exciting game. May you all be blessed on this day.

EDIT: I just saw a post from Cowboy_Ron in the thread "The Superdome is a Dump". I thought someone said he had passed away???????????
 
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Cowboys_22

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Good morning Pops and friends. Wife and I are hitting the road in a couple of hours. Going back home for 3 or 4 weeks.
Weather lady says our highs today will be in mid to upper 90s. Hard to imagine snow is already falling on folks up north.
Have a good day everyone and Go Cowboys!
 

CouchCoach

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Good morning Pops and please excuse me while I reprimand Jan. My dear lady, after all we've shared here, you feel the need to apologize for anger, dismay, frustration, pain and venting to us? There is no judgment here, only support. Pain and joy are both shared here and we share in both with each other. Even something as terrible as the loss of a loved one to being happy for Runny and his days off.

Xelda is right, as she often is but I wouldn't admit it we were married, you have the ones closest to you there to help you grieve and share in the unfairness of life. It is that unfairness that causes me to question what this is all about. I try not to dwell on these questions without answers as that just leads to more questions.

Not knowing Mark and his family isn't necessary for me to feel and share your pain for who among us is untouched by this heartless monster? I do have questions for you. Since you and Mark fought the monster side by side, how would he want you to feel? How would he want you to think about him, his life in victory or his death in defeat in this life? Grief and mourning are expected but so is admiration and pride in how he lived, not sorrow for how he died. That's what the monster wants, collateral damage, broken hearts and to celebrate another victory and supremacy over us. Keep healthy and victorious Mark foremost in your thoughts, as you know he would want, because you defeated the monster once and it's a very sore loser and uses stress to it's advantage. You stay strong and to hell with survivor guilt, you are a bona fide warrior that kicked the monster's ***. And I don't need to know Mark to know he would say that as well.
 

Runwildboys

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Morning, Pops and pen pals. It's game day and it's going to be interesting to see us go up against a competitive team in a hostile environment. It should be an exciting game. May you all be blessed on this day.

EDIT: I just saw a post from Cowboy_Ron in the thread "The Superdome is a Dump". I thought someone said he had passed away???????????
No, he hasn't passed. He's not doing well, and talks as if he doesn't expect to be around much longer, but for now, we still have him.
 

GrammaJan

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Good morning Pops and please excuse me while I reprimand Jan. My dear lady, after all we've shared here, you feel the need to apologize for anger, dismay, frustration, pain and venting to us? There is no judgment here, only support. Pain and joy are both shared here and we share in both with each other. Even something as terrible as the loss of a loved one to being happy for Runny and his days off.

Xelda is right, as she often is but I wouldn't admit it we were married, you have the ones closest to you there to help you grieve and share in the unfairness of life. It is that unfairness that causes me to question what this is all about. I try not to dwell on these questions without answers as that just leads to more questions.

Not knowing Mark and his family isn't necessary for me to feel and share your pain for who among us is untouched by this heartless monster? I do have questions for you. Since you and Mark fought the monster side by side, how would he want you to feel? How would he want you to think about him, his life in victory or his death in defeat in this life? Grief and mourning are expected but so is admiration and pride in how he lived, not sorrow for how he died. That's what the monster wants, collateral damage, broken hearts and to celebrate another victory and supremacy over us. Keep healthy and victorious Mark foremost in your thoughts, as you know he would want, because you defeated the monster once and it's a very sore loser and uses stress to it's advantage. You stay strong and to hell with survivor guilt, you are a bona fide warrior that kicked the monster's ***. And I don't need to know Mark to know he would say that as well.
Thank you Coach. Very well spoken and you hit it head on. I'll mourn losing Mark, but yes, after the grief will remember the good and press on as he would have wanted.
 

Xelda

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I'm so sorry Pops and friends. I wasted all my good football juju on worthless teams earlier today. I didn't mean to, but it happened anyway. The devil tried to kill me tonight! With 30 seconds left in the game my TV went black. I kept trying and trying to get it back on and had no luck until :02 seconds left. The cable company has massive amounts of bad juju thoughts headed their way. I saw where Dish has removed FOX from it's line up. That's huge at this time of year.

Hey Leon, Ron is very much alive and posting. We won't let him die. He's our Precious... well, one of them. He's in the CZ Ring of Honor with all of you.

I would like to close with saying that I hate late night games. They disrupt my sleep schedule something fierce.

Be safe on your trip Colo, have a good evening everyone and see y'all tomorrow.
 

cowboy_ron

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Morning, Pops and pen pals. It's game day and it's going to be interesting to see us go up against a competitive team in a hostile environment. It should be an exciting game. May you all be blessed on this day.

EDIT: I just saw a post from Cowboy_Ron in the thread "The Superdome is a Dump". I thought someone said he had passed away???????????
Yo, Leon........:flagwave:..........not yet my friend.
 

LeonDixson

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Morning, Pops and pen pals. It was a disappointing game last night, but it's not going to ruin my day. I may have a buyer for my season tickets and seat licenses. I will use the money to improve my condo if I can sell them. Y'all have a great day.
 
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