Good morning Pops and everyone else going to their last day of PT. Today is re-evaluation day, which I could never convince any of my teachers to consider.
Tell ya what I am re-evaluating, my choice of where to live. However, I have this dilemma. I moved here, mostly for emotional reasons and not well thought out reasoning, to be close to family but I am not happy where I live. However, I do not know if I would be happy living somewhere else and how do I explain this to my older son, the one with my grandchildren, if I did decide to move back to the Northwest? Pack up some more guilt and head out?
That old saying you can't make others happy until you are happy has me examining exactly what happiness is and if a change of climate and scenery would really have any effect on that. I've been thinking about this for quite some time and doing a little self-analysis and find that I am a better doctor than cooperative patient. The best definition of happiness for myself is nothing more than the absence of unhappiness. So I do what I can for fleeting moments of the lack of unhappiness. I do that here a lot. I really think that's why I come here.
That's a weird way to look at happiness and life in general but I am coming to believe that's just as good as it's going to get for me and I have to be accepting of that. The real challenge of finding true happiness is first defining that for myself and I don't know what that looks like or if it's hiding in another location. I do not know if I have ever been truly happy and that really saddens me. I took those gifts of happiness for granted while I searched for happiness.
Anyway, when you are happy, my friends, stop and drink that in. Freeze that moment and imprint that into your memory bank because that vault needs to be full.